Forever Changed
My life will be forever changed.
Sunday night, Chris and i were lounging around as usual, and we were watching a movie, i really wanted to watch the new willy wonka so we stayed up all hours of the night watching it, all a sudden my phone starts ringing, "cool" by Gwen s. It's Clare's set ringtone on my phone! I didnt answer, again he calls i thought it must be important, it was 2 am for christ sake.
He was drunk and who knows what else, and wanted to talk about things, i guess.. well we all know why he called, any how Chris was so pissed he called him back and was like, why you callen my lady n shit!He was pissed and i was pissed.
Clare is my only really good guy friend and no matter what time of night it is, he shouldnt feel scared to call me, more so when he is drunk! Chris and i fought till almost 5 o clock in the morning about fucking Clare, and then Chris asked if i thought we were falling apart? It has been turning in my mind that he might view our relationship that way! Why else would he say it? I told him that Clare and i will always be friends and he needs to stop, i put up with it already with my ex, i wont do it again, boys come and go, but friends last forever, even if he is male! IT pisses me off there is no rule saying that males and females cant be friends, that we cant hang out, and talk, but no if we hang out it is becuase were having sex and shit... he pisses me off... I dont know what will happen, When andrew started doing this things fell apart and i would hate to see it happen again, but i value my friendships and i will always be there for anyone, no matter what time of day or night it is.... my friends shouldnt be afraid to call, more so when i am with Chris!
So, I've hit a bump in the rd.
Im 19, and i think that I've already rushed my life away, i need time.. my brain fells like a parking lot, always comming and parking for a while, and then leaving.. but alas... Im so afriad that the reason i feel this way is b/c of my history, and well we all know Im not miss innocent..
What to do!?
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