why all the madness? How does it stop?
** JUST IGNORE ITS JUST RAMBLES!!!**
Many people want to know how to help stop my crazy self destructiveness...? How do you help a cutter? Why do I cut? what drives me? where are my emotions coming from? I don't know how to stop... If I knew that I could do it!!! I dont like the scars I dont like the pain I put my friends through when I do it. I would like to stop! If there is somthing that someone out there has tried LET ME KNOW! I am wide open to suggestions! I will try anything! I feel like I have tried everything! All that you can do as a friend is just listen and give out hugs when NEEDED... I dont have anymore answers. I know that you all care and I know you all worry... I wish that I cared and worried about my self like you do... I have never tought of my self as a real person I never do anything for myself! I dont buy my self stuff. I would rather spend the money on other people. I have no self esteem. this is all from past things that have happpened. I cut because I am Angry, frustrated, sad, depressed, I can't feel, I just feel those things. Never happiness, or good things. I just feel like a worthless peice of shit! I dont think my zoloft is working... I know that you can say that I am not and i hear you I just dont believe you. Not that I dont think you are sencer (sp?) or that you are lying. Its just I dont believe in me. I am so lonely all the time! I just want out of this life this town this house everything!! I hate my self for telling you all my problems because I feel like a burden. I just feel like a complainer. I am so sorry I am not trying to complain. I just need help and I am glad I have people like you aroung! I love you all OH SOOO MUCH I would jump infront of a bus for any of you!!! I feel like all I have is problems and I am on this downward sprial of shit! I do NOT want to drag any of you into my bull shit! I just cut because I am a worthless, ugly, peice of shit that will die and old maid! Anyway just igore what I say its all crap!
Many people want to know how to help stop my crazy self destructiveness...? How do you help a cutter? Why do I cut? what drives me? where are my emotions coming from? I don't know how to stop... If I knew that I could do it!!! I dont like the scars I dont like the pain I put my friends through when I do it. I would like to stop! If there is somthing that someone out there has tried LET ME KNOW! I am wide open to suggestions! I will try anything! I feel like I have tried everything! All that you can do as a friend is just listen and give out hugs when NEEDED... I dont have anymore answers. I know that you all care and I know you all worry... I wish that I cared and worried about my self like you do... I have never tought of my self as a real person I never do anything for myself! I dont buy my self stuff. I would rather spend the money on other people. I have no self esteem. this is all from past things that have happpened. I cut because I am Angry, frustrated, sad, depressed, I can't feel, I just feel those things. Never happiness, or good things. I just feel like a worthless peice of shit! I dont think my zoloft is working... I know that you can say that I am not and i hear you I just dont believe you. Not that I dont think you are sencer (sp?) or that you are lying. Its just I dont believe in me. I am so lonely all the time! I just want out of this life this town this house everything!! I hate my self for telling you all my problems because I feel like a burden. I just feel like a complainer. I am so sorry I am not trying to complain. I just need help and I am glad I have people like you aroung! I love you all OH SOOO MUCH I would jump infront of a bus for any of you!!! I feel like all I have is problems and I am on this downward sprial of shit! I do NOT want to drag any of you into my bull shit! I just cut because I am a worthless, ugly, peice of shit that will die and old maid! Anyway just igore what I say its all crap!