Why You Should Give in and Love the Bruins: A Primer for Sylvie
OK, so. I am working on dragging the lovely rufflefeather into the world of hockey. And for totally selfish reasons, I want her to cheer for the Bruins. BECAUSE THEY ARE THE BEST, SYLVIE, DON'T LISTEN TO ANYONE ELSE. Ahem.
So, here is a brief introduction that I hope will win you over. Or at least teach you a little more about hockey, anyway.
PART I: Background Info
(I'm taking this part pretty much directly from wikipedia, I'll try to stick to things you might actually find interesting)
Nicknames: The Black and Gold, Spoked B, The B's
Founded in: 1924 (Original Six, what whaaaat)
Conference: Eastern
Division: Atlantic
Home Arena: TD Garden
Minor League Affiliate: Providence Bruins (AHL)
Rival: Montreal Canadiens (THE HABS, WE HATE THEM, DEEPLY AND IRRATIONALLY)
Stanley Cup Wins: 6 (most recent being 2011)
Head Coach: Claude Julien
Captain: Zdeno Chara
Uniforms:
BLACK AND GOLD, SYLVIE. Not yellow. The bear is our alternate logo, I love him. Look at that sassy bitch face.
Mascot: Blades the Bear
He is hilarious, and features in a number of not-always-nice ads known as the Bruins Hockey Rules:
PART II: PLAYERS
ok, this part could be 4 posts long in itself, so I'll try not to gush too much about every single player. But I could, Sylvie. Oh, I could.
Let's start with the big man:
Zdeno Chara
Nicknames: Big Z, Z, Mama Bear
Age: 36
Position: Defense
With the team since: 2006
The first thing you need to know about Z is that he is a GIANT. Seriously. He's 6'9" and swings a 109mph slapshot, the fastest on record. The man is a beast, in the best possible way. He doesn't fight as often as some of the other guys, mostly because, well, no one really wants to pick a fight with a behemoth. He has a very protective streak, and if someone hurts one of his guys, he'll kick the everloving shit out of them. It's why we call him Mama Bear.
Here's some evidence of how angry he gets when you mess with his cubs:
There is a famous saying about the Bruins: 'Don't poke the Bear.' This is why. He rocks those crazy eyes. He's also one of our top guys on both the power play and the penalty kill (oh god, I haven't explained that yet, have I? I'll get to it. Basically: he's clutch in all situations)
Patrice Bergeron
Nicknames: Bergy, Perfect Patrice
Age: 28
Position: Center
With the team since: 2003
Bergy is one of our alternate captains. He is actually, legitimately perfect (in an interview he once disputed this fact by pointing out that he can't be perfect because he's messy. SO PERFECT.) He's definitely one of the best and most egregiously underrated forwards in the NHL. He's one of our biggest goal scorers, especially when it matters most. He scored the game winning goal that won the Cup in 2011. He scored most of the big goals that got us through the playoffs last season. He is the definition of clutch.
In last season's Stanley Cup Final versus Chicago, he played several games with crazy injuries, like broken ribs, a punctured lung, a separated shoulder. But he cared so much about his team that he played through it. Hockey players are badass.
Unlike most of the other Bruins, he almost never fights. He's more of a skill guy than a brute force kind of player. He's also a big philanthropist, and just about the classiest person on the planet. Last season he won the NHL's leadership award, and rightly so.
Also, he's just so damn pretty:
Milan Lucic
Nicknames: Looch, Hulk
Age: 25
Position: left wing
With the team since: 2007
Looch is a giant as well, but where Chara is tall, Looch is just broad and massive. He's what we call a power forward, meaning he's an offensive player who is very defensively minded, with a very physical style. Meaning: he lays on the big hits. In fact, He's got so much strength in that giant frame, he once checked a guy through the glass. No, seriously:
He's also a big fighter, though, like Chara, few guys wanna tangle with him.
What is hilarious, though, is that off the ice he's just a giant teddy bear. He never stops smiling and laughing, it's too cute.
He never stops smiling!
(Taking his daughter to her first Sox game. You're never too young.)
I think Looch is a fan favorite because he sort of embodies how Bostonians like to think of ourselves: tough, dedicated, loyal, speaks his mind, never backs down. He's one badass teddy bear.
Brad Marchand
Nicknames: Marchy (marshy), Little Ball of Hate, Honey Badger
Age: 25
Position: left wing
With the team since: 2008
He's called Little Ball of Hate for a reason: he's small (by hockey standards), and he's full of rage. He's a scrappy little guy who loves scoring pretty goals and starting shit with anyone who comes within shouting distance. It's sort of endearing, like a tiny bulldog.
He has a reputation for partying, mostly with his bro Tyler Seguin, who got traded in the offseason. They have matching Stanley Cup tattoos. On their ribs. Oh, boys.
Best bros for life.
Jarome Iginla
Nicknames: Iggy
Age: 36
Position: Right Wing
With the team since: 2013
There was a big controversy last season that boils down to this: Iggy wanted to leave his old team (Calgary), because he was tired of never winning anything. It was announced that he had agreed to a contract with the Bruins, and all of Boston was beside itself with joy.
But then. The next day he pulled an 'oh, jk, I'm actually going to Pittsburgh, screw you, Boston' (ok, he didn't actually use those words, but he's admitted that he thought Pittsburgh had a better chance than Boston in the playoffs. Which is hilarious and ironic, because we ended up sweeping them in the conference finals).
So, in the offseason he signed with Boston for real this time, and fans were a little torn. On the one hand, he's a great player, but on the other, he snubbed us, and we're a prideful bunch.
LOL JK.
But he's making it up to us by scoring goals and getting in pretty awesome fights, so. We've (I've) mostly forgiven him. If he helps us to another Cup, we may even forget.
David Krejci
Nicknames: Krej, That Shit Krej, Krejciface
Age: 27
Position: Center
With the team since: 2007
Krejciface is our other resident Czech. He's a reliable goal scorer, and pulls out the big goals when we need them (he had a hat trick in round two of the playoffs last season). He centers our second line with Looch and Iggy, right now. He and Chara are both going to be playing for the Czech Olympic team this winter. Off the ice, he's very quiet and polite and pretty much stays out of the spotlight.
Torey Krug
Nicknames: Krugs, Kruger, Freddy
Age: 22
Position: Defense
With the team since: 2013
Krug was playing for our Providence affiliate last season, until we had a bunch of injuries in the playoffs, and he was called up. He scored 4 goals in 5 games (which is crazy for a defenseman, in the playoffs, nevermind a rookie who'd only played 2 previous NHL games). All of Boston fell in love with him. He started this year on the main roster, and he's picked right up where he left off.
Also, his goal celebrations (cellies), are the cutest:
Dougie Hamilton
Nicknames: Dougie, Muppet Baby, Teach me how to Dougie
Age: 20
Position: Defense
With the team since: 2013
Dougie was our rookie last season. I love him like a little brother. Last year was pretty much a learning and adjustment year for him. This year he's stepping it up. He did a lot of growing up over the summer (and got disturbingly hot all of a sudden), and now he's bulkier and hitting harder, playing a more physical game. He won the fan award last year for the player who goes above and beyond. We have high expectations for our little ginger baby.
Also, he makes hilarious muppet faces:
Tuukka Rask
Nicknames: Tuuk, Fear the Rask
Age: 26
Position: Goalie
With the team since: 2007
TUUUUUUUUUUUUUK. That is a chant you hear a lot at games, because the crowd does it every time he makes an amazing save. Which is pretty much all the time. He stepped up as our main goaltender last season, and he had an amazing season. He led most of the goalie statistics league-wide all season, and totally dominated in the playoffs. They renewed his contract for another 8 years, and he's now one of the top paid goalie in the world. Deservedly so.
Also, his steely goalie glare looks totally out of place on his adorable baby face:
AND. He has the coolest mask in the entire league:
RAWR. Also, he has an awful temper. Sometimes he throws fits and hits things when he doesn't do well. We call them Tuukka tantrums. They're kind of hilarious. He also snarks at the press and swears in interviews. I adore the crap out of him.
Arrrgh I could talk about so many more, but I don't want to overwhelm you. Yet.
I just wanna sum up by saying: I love the Bruins because we have a lot of star players, and yet it really is about the team as a whole. We have one of the best team mentalities and team dynamics out there. We're all about depth, not just stars. It's why I love them so much.
PART III: Visual Evidence of Awesomeness
Because the best way to start understanding hockey is to just watch as much as you can. So have some super awesome highlight reels, plus some vids of the boys being awesome/adorable/badass.
Tuukka's top saves:
Krug's beauty goals from the playoffs:
The ceremony after the bombings last March. It still makes me cry.
This one is a year recap of last season. It takes you through most of the biggest moments. It makes me cry for a lot of reasons you won't understand yet.
I didn't include Gregory Campbell above, but this is the moment that made him a Boston hero in the playoffs last season, when he broke his leg blocking a shot and kept playing. Jack Edwards is a little dramatic, but he's not wrong.
(The Dropkick Murphys are a Boston sports anthem staple)
An event at Harvard where Andrew Ference (who left the team this year and took my heart with him) pokes fun at Big Z.
(every time Chara scores, my sister and I shout REJOICE, TINY SUBJECTS!)
And if you wanna watch something longer and more behind the scenes, the NHL network featured Bergy on NHL 36, a show that follows players around for 36 hours and films their lives.
OK, SO. What do you think? Sold? I don't know much about the Red Wings, but how could they be this fun, eh?
Maybe next I'll actually give you a rundown of some of the rules of the game...
So, here is a brief introduction that I hope will win you over. Or at least teach you a little more about hockey, anyway.
PART I: Background Info
(I'm taking this part pretty much directly from wikipedia, I'll try to stick to things you might actually find interesting)
Nicknames: The Black and Gold, Spoked B, The B's
Founded in: 1924 (Original Six, what whaaaat)
Conference: Eastern
Division: Atlantic
Home Arena: TD Garden
Minor League Affiliate: Providence Bruins (AHL)
Rival: Montreal Canadiens (THE HABS, WE HATE THEM, DEEPLY AND IRRATIONALLY)
Stanley Cup Wins: 6 (most recent being 2011)
Head Coach: Claude Julien
Captain: Zdeno Chara
Uniforms:
BLACK AND GOLD, SYLVIE. Not yellow. The bear is our alternate logo, I love him. Look at that sassy bitch face.
Mascot: Blades the Bear
He is hilarious, and features in a number of not-always-nice ads known as the Bruins Hockey Rules:
Click to viewPART II: PLAYERS
ok, this part could be 4 posts long in itself, so I'll try not to gush too much about every single player. But I could, Sylvie. Oh, I could.
Let's start with the big man:
Zdeno Chara
Nicknames: Big Z, Z, Mama Bear
Age: 36
Position: Defense
With the team since: 2006
The first thing you need to know about Z is that he is a GIANT. Seriously. He's 6'9" and swings a 109mph slapshot, the fastest on record. The man is a beast, in the best possible way. He doesn't fight as often as some of the other guys, mostly because, well, no one really wants to pick a fight with a behemoth. He has a very protective streak, and if someone hurts one of his guys, he'll kick the everloving shit out of them. It's why we call him Mama Bear.
Here's some evidence of how angry he gets when you mess with his cubs:
There is a famous saying about the Bruins: 'Don't poke the Bear.' This is why. He rocks those crazy eyes. He's also one of our top guys on both the power play and the penalty kill (oh god, I haven't explained that yet, have I? I'll get to it. Basically: he's clutch in all situations)
Patrice Bergeron
Nicknames: Bergy, Perfect Patrice
Age: 28
Position: Center
With the team since: 2003
Bergy is one of our alternate captains. He is actually, legitimately perfect (in an interview he once disputed this fact by pointing out that he can't be perfect because he's messy. SO PERFECT.) He's definitely one of the best and most egregiously underrated forwards in the NHL. He's one of our biggest goal scorers, especially when it matters most. He scored the game winning goal that won the Cup in 2011. He scored most of the big goals that got us through the playoffs last season. He is the definition of clutch.
In last season's Stanley Cup Final versus Chicago, he played several games with crazy injuries, like broken ribs, a punctured lung, a separated shoulder. But he cared so much about his team that he played through it. Hockey players are badass.
Unlike most of the other Bruins, he almost never fights. He's more of a skill guy than a brute force kind of player. He's also a big philanthropist, and just about the classiest person on the planet. Last season he won the NHL's leadership award, and rightly so.
Also, he's just so damn pretty:
Milan Lucic
Nicknames: Looch, Hulk
Age: 25
Position: left wing
With the team since: 2007
Looch is a giant as well, but where Chara is tall, Looch is just broad and massive. He's what we call a power forward, meaning he's an offensive player who is very defensively minded, with a very physical style. Meaning: he lays on the big hits. In fact, He's got so much strength in that giant frame, he once checked a guy through the glass. No, seriously:
He's also a big fighter, though, like Chara, few guys wanna tangle with him.
What is hilarious, though, is that off the ice he's just a giant teddy bear. He never stops smiling and laughing, it's too cute.
He never stops smiling!
(Taking his daughter to her first Sox game. You're never too young.)
I think Looch is a fan favorite because he sort of embodies how Bostonians like to think of ourselves: tough, dedicated, loyal, speaks his mind, never backs down. He's one badass teddy bear.
Brad Marchand
Nicknames: Marchy (marshy), Little Ball of Hate, Honey Badger
Age: 25
Position: left wing
With the team since: 2008
He's called Little Ball of Hate for a reason: he's small (by hockey standards), and he's full of rage. He's a scrappy little guy who loves scoring pretty goals and starting shit with anyone who comes within shouting distance. It's sort of endearing, like a tiny bulldog.
He has a reputation for partying, mostly with his bro Tyler Seguin, who got traded in the offseason. They have matching Stanley Cup tattoos. On their ribs. Oh, boys.
Best bros for life.
Jarome Iginla
Nicknames: Iggy
Age: 36
Position: Right Wing
With the team since: 2013
There was a big controversy last season that boils down to this: Iggy wanted to leave his old team (Calgary), because he was tired of never winning anything. It was announced that he had agreed to a contract with the Bruins, and all of Boston was beside itself with joy.
But then. The next day he pulled an 'oh, jk, I'm actually going to Pittsburgh, screw you, Boston' (ok, he didn't actually use those words, but he's admitted that he thought Pittsburgh had a better chance than Boston in the playoffs. Which is hilarious and ironic, because we ended up sweeping them in the conference finals).
So, in the offseason he signed with Boston for real this time, and fans were a little torn. On the one hand, he's a great player, but on the other, he snubbed us, and we're a prideful bunch.
LOL JK.
But he's making it up to us by scoring goals and getting in pretty awesome fights, so. We've (I've) mostly forgiven him. If he helps us to another Cup, we may even forget.
David Krejci
Nicknames: Krej, That Shit Krej, Krejciface
Age: 27
Position: Center
With the team since: 2007
Krejciface is our other resident Czech. He's a reliable goal scorer, and pulls out the big goals when we need them (he had a hat trick in round two of the playoffs last season). He centers our second line with Looch and Iggy, right now. He and Chara are both going to be playing for the Czech Olympic team this winter. Off the ice, he's very quiet and polite and pretty much stays out of the spotlight.
Torey Krug
Nicknames: Krugs, Kruger, Freddy
Age: 22
Position: Defense
With the team since: 2013
Krug was playing for our Providence affiliate last season, until we had a bunch of injuries in the playoffs, and he was called up. He scored 4 goals in 5 games (which is crazy for a defenseman, in the playoffs, nevermind a rookie who'd only played 2 previous NHL games). All of Boston fell in love with him. He started this year on the main roster, and he's picked right up where he left off.
Also, his goal celebrations (cellies), are the cutest:
Dougie Hamilton
Nicknames: Dougie, Muppet Baby, Teach me how to Dougie
Age: 20
Position: Defense
With the team since: 2013
Dougie was our rookie last season. I love him like a little brother. Last year was pretty much a learning and adjustment year for him. This year he's stepping it up. He did a lot of growing up over the summer (and got disturbingly hot all of a sudden), and now he's bulkier and hitting harder, playing a more physical game. He won the fan award last year for the player who goes above and beyond. We have high expectations for our little ginger baby.
Also, he makes hilarious muppet faces:
Tuukka Rask
Nicknames: Tuuk, Fear the Rask
Age: 26
Position: Goalie
With the team since: 2007
TUUUUUUUUUUUUUK. That is a chant you hear a lot at games, because the crowd does it every time he makes an amazing save. Which is pretty much all the time. He stepped up as our main goaltender last season, and he had an amazing season. He led most of the goalie statistics league-wide all season, and totally dominated in the playoffs. They renewed his contract for another 8 years, and he's now one of the top paid goalie in the world. Deservedly so.
Also, his steely goalie glare looks totally out of place on his adorable baby face:
AND. He has the coolest mask in the entire league:
RAWR. Also, he has an awful temper. Sometimes he throws fits and hits things when he doesn't do well. We call them Tuukka tantrums. They're kind of hilarious. He also snarks at the press and swears in interviews. I adore the crap out of him.
Arrrgh I could talk about so many more, but I don't want to overwhelm you. Yet.
I just wanna sum up by saying: I love the Bruins because we have a lot of star players, and yet it really is about the team as a whole. We have one of the best team mentalities and team dynamics out there. We're all about depth, not just stars. It's why I love them so much.
PART III: Visual Evidence of Awesomeness
Because the best way to start understanding hockey is to just watch as much as you can. So have some super awesome highlight reels, plus some vids of the boys being awesome/adorable/badass.
Tuukka's top saves:
Krug's beauty goals from the playoffs:
The ceremony after the bombings last March. It still makes me cry.
This one is a year recap of last season. It takes you through most of the biggest moments. It makes me cry for a lot of reasons you won't understand yet.
I didn't include Gregory Campbell above, but this is the moment that made him a Boston hero in the playoffs last season, when he broke his leg blocking a shot and kept playing. Jack Edwards is a little dramatic, but he's not wrong.
(The Dropkick Murphys are a Boston sports anthem staple)
An event at Harvard where Andrew Ference (who left the team this year and took my heart with him) pokes fun at Big Z.
(every time Chara scores, my sister and I shout REJOICE, TINY SUBJECTS!)
And if you wanna watch something longer and more behind the scenes, the NHL network featured Bergy on NHL 36, a show that follows players around for 36 hours and films their lives.
OK, SO. What do you think? Sold? I don't know much about the Red Wings, but how could they be this fun, eh?
Maybe next I'll actually give you a rundown of some of the rules of the game...