we're all dumb and jaded
He just ...
Spike just...
Before I could even say anything, before I could even say goodbye, Spike was gone. Through the wall. There was nothing to even suggest that he’d been there in the first place, nothing but the dull ache of my heart.
I shoved my hands into my pockets and began to walk in the opposite direction, without any real clue concerning exits in this maze of offices. It didn’t help that every corridor looked the same, just like all the people. They were just a mass of suits in drab colors, briefcase in one hand, cell phone in other. I glanced around me.
Whatever happened to the glory days of the big neon exit sign? And why wasn’t sense of direction included in my slayer power pack?
Eventually I ended up in an elevator and that elevator led me to a parking garage, but my car was parked in Angel’s fancy motor pool and I wasn’t going back in there just to avoid walking home. Walking I was good at. Expert, really. Practiced pro.
I took a long time navigating the streets of L.A. back to my dad’s house. It wasn’t really far, but if you walked around every block before turning a corner, intentionally avoiding cemeteries, a twenty minute walk was suddenly two hours and counting. By the time I got home it was pitch black outside and I just sat on the front steps for a little while, not wanting to go inside just yet. Not wanting to explain my whereabouts for a bad father who couldn’t accept that I wasn’t fifteen anymore.
I sighed, resting my chin on my hands. Coming back to L.A. was definitely not my best idea ever. I mean, I could’ve gone anywhere. America was a fairly good sized country and I’m sure there were lots of other places full of creatures of the night just waiting for me to kill them. Could’ve moved to Salem. I’m sure Willow would’ve been all over it, I mean Witch Capital U.S.A. In one of my friendlier moments with Faith, she confessed that it was also Pirate Capital U.S.A., so Xander would’ve fit right in, too. And Giles would’ve approved, cause a place like that? It’s gotta get all the touristy demons.
And of course there’s the rest of the world, but I had to come here because three months ago I told Angel I was cookie dough and he seemed to buy it. And then Spike died and the cookies were ready and metaphors were never my strong point. And something inside of me was convinced - no, still is convinced that Angel’s the love of my life.
I stood up and took a deep breath before walking into the house. Dad was snoozing on the couch, probably waiting up for me. I tiptoed past him and he kept snoring. On the way to my room, I stopped in front of Dawn’s door. I looked it for several seconds before creaking it open gently. She was sleeping too, her breathing slow and steady.
I shut the door gently and went back to my room. Dawn and Dad had the right idea. Sleep.
Spike just...
Before I could even say anything, before I could even say goodbye, Spike was gone. Through the wall. There was nothing to even suggest that he’d been there in the first place, nothing but the dull ache of my heart.
I shoved my hands into my pockets and began to walk in the opposite direction, without any real clue concerning exits in this maze of offices. It didn’t help that every corridor looked the same, just like all the people. They were just a mass of suits in drab colors, briefcase in one hand, cell phone in other. I glanced around me.
Whatever happened to the glory days of the big neon exit sign? And why wasn’t sense of direction included in my slayer power pack?
Eventually I ended up in an elevator and that elevator led me to a parking garage, but my car was parked in Angel’s fancy motor pool and I wasn’t going back in there just to avoid walking home. Walking I was good at. Expert, really. Practiced pro.
I took a long time navigating the streets of L.A. back to my dad’s house. It wasn’t really far, but if you walked around every block before turning a corner, intentionally avoiding cemeteries, a twenty minute walk was suddenly two hours and counting. By the time I got home it was pitch black outside and I just sat on the front steps for a little while, not wanting to go inside just yet. Not wanting to explain my whereabouts for a bad father who couldn’t accept that I wasn’t fifteen anymore.
I sighed, resting my chin on my hands. Coming back to L.A. was definitely not my best idea ever. I mean, I could’ve gone anywhere. America was a fairly good sized country and I’m sure there were lots of other places full of creatures of the night just waiting for me to kill them. Could’ve moved to Salem. I’m sure Willow would’ve been all over it, I mean Witch Capital U.S.A. In one of my friendlier moments with Faith, she confessed that it was also Pirate Capital U.S.A., so Xander would’ve fit right in, too. And Giles would’ve approved, cause a place like that? It’s gotta get all the touristy demons.
And of course there’s the rest of the world, but I had to come here because three months ago I told Angel I was cookie dough and he seemed to buy it. And then Spike died and the cookies were ready and metaphors were never my strong point. And something inside of me was convinced - no, still is convinced that Angel’s the love of my life.
I stood up and took a deep breath before walking into the house. Dad was snoozing on the couch, probably waiting up for me. I tiptoed past him and he kept snoring. On the way to my room, I stopped in front of Dawn’s door. I looked it for several seconds before creaking it open gently. She was sleeping too, her breathing slow and steady.
I shut the door gently and went back to my room. Dawn and Dad had the right idea. Sleep.