back again?
Since my last entry i have entered a world completely unknown to the person i once was. i have climbed the highest level of experience and fallen so hard that my existence almost became clear. i have moved out picked up other jobs and started college. i have fallen into a sea of love hate drugs and memories that seem as though they are not even there. im coming out on top now and im ready to re ground myself. over this summer i have grown up and regressed intensely all in one. i have lost friends made new ones and forgot that i could be one to myself. i have gone from dancing in the moonlight to sitting in hospital beds. i have forgot at one point that hearts could be healed or broken. i have had one small romance that gripped me so fucking hard then shattered. i have fallen in love with a best friend and realized that karma is a fucking bitch and have been so stung by it that i felt if i didnt get the outcome i wanted my heart was going to disinegrate right inside of my own chest. now i am back to being bitter towards the male race and getting by on memories of a boy i barely knew but he somehow made me feeeeeeeel so real. i am crazy and everyday i see more of the mystery we call life. the only thing about it is the more you see the more of a mystery it becomes. i am spiritual but not morally sound. i am ready to be saved. not by some higher power but by someone who can ground me right now and here. i never knew families could get along. but i do love mine. alottt. thats the only love that i think stays forever. i believe families share pieces of the same soul so they have to care somewhere deep inside. i have seen alot of shit over the past five months alot of shit that humans arent naturally capable of seeing and i have felt so damn high but for every up there is a down so lets balance our lives....
if there is such thing as a balance.
im not ready for full time school but its coming quick.....
and in life there is always so much pressure.
i really might run far away soon but youll just have to wait and see/
if there is such thing as a balance.
im not ready for full time school but its coming quick.....
and in life there is always so much pressure.
i really might run far away soon but youll just have to wait and see/