i hate throwing parties
this party was better, but i still felt like all i did was be a bitch all night, take care of drunken people, yell at everyone, feel bad that one of the people it was for was upset the whole night nothing was making their mood improve... and then i got to clean up everyones fucking cigarette butts off of the floor in the morning.
WHOEVER PUT THEIR CIGARETTE OUT IN MY CHAIR CAN DIE. there were ashtrays everywhere, you could have even put it out on the floor like everyone else did... but in the seat of the chair?? THANKS, ASSHOLE.
also, levi burned the bottom of his foot on a cigarette butt.
definitely no more smoking in the house at these things. i'm not having a party again for a LONG TIME. like, until i can drink again. i always get stuck cleaning them up by myself the next day. it's cool though cause since i clean up all the cans, i take back all the cans and i keep all the moneys. haha... that almost looks like monkeys.. but it's not! yay.
i love my kitties. they are going to the vet this week for shots and to see wtf is wrong with the grey one. i need to name them.
i wanna name the white one Tigra.. and the grey one can be... Memphis. yes. that will be their names wether i ever call them that or not. haha.. they need names for the vet accounts. lol.
i'm hungry.
we're supposed to go out to 26 and vandyke and clean and paint and shampoo the carpets of my parent's neighbor's mom's condo (she doesn't live there).. but idk. my mom thinks my nana is going to die soon.. like, in the next couple days and she's worried we're going to start it and then have to come home and be at the funeral home and stuff. whatever... i guess i just have to go on with the plans i have and then accomodate accordingly.
i sound so numb to her death... but it's like, i'm tired of seeing her suffer and be so out of it and everything.. i know she's ready for the end.. and knowing she's ready makes me ready. does this make sense or do i just sound like an asshole? when my parents told my brother he totally broke down and cried and cried... why is he reacting this way and i'm not? i know why my dad is so emotional.. that's his MOM. alex and i have the same relationship with nana, pretty much, so it really surprised me when my mom told me that's how he reacted. it made me feel so uncaring.. but i know the more tears doesn't mean you care more. blah.. idk what i'm saying. i jjst really wish she was going to be here for the baby... but i know she'll see him anyway.
i have a doctors appointment at 8:20 in the morning... i think i will die tomorrow. die means fall asleep in the back room at work.. and get fired. pam hates me again.. i didn't go to the meeting on sunday so she's being a bitch to me and she only gave me 8 hours next week. whatever... her back room will look like shit and she'll ask me if i can come in more days. haha i am sweet and i win at life.
omgtired.
i can feel it, this week is gonna be a long one.
Summer has come and pass,
the innocent can never last.
Wake me up when September ends.
WHOEVER PUT THEIR CIGARETTE OUT IN MY CHAIR CAN DIE. there were ashtrays everywhere, you could have even put it out on the floor like everyone else did... but in the seat of the chair?? THANKS, ASSHOLE.
also, levi burned the bottom of his foot on a cigarette butt.
definitely no more smoking in the house at these things. i'm not having a party again for a LONG TIME. like, until i can drink again. i always get stuck cleaning them up by myself the next day. it's cool though cause since i clean up all the cans, i take back all the cans and i keep all the moneys. haha... that almost looks like monkeys.. but it's not! yay.
i love my kitties. they are going to the vet this week for shots and to see wtf is wrong with the grey one. i need to name them.
i wanna name the white one Tigra.. and the grey one can be... Memphis. yes. that will be their names wether i ever call them that or not. haha.. they need names for the vet accounts. lol.
i'm hungry.
we're supposed to go out to 26 and vandyke and clean and paint and shampoo the carpets of my parent's neighbor's mom's condo (she doesn't live there).. but idk. my mom thinks my nana is going to die soon.. like, in the next couple days and she's worried we're going to start it and then have to come home and be at the funeral home and stuff. whatever... i guess i just have to go on with the plans i have and then accomodate accordingly.
i sound so numb to her death... but it's like, i'm tired of seeing her suffer and be so out of it and everything.. i know she's ready for the end.. and knowing she's ready makes me ready. does this make sense or do i just sound like an asshole? when my parents told my brother he totally broke down and cried and cried... why is he reacting this way and i'm not? i know why my dad is so emotional.. that's his MOM. alex and i have the same relationship with nana, pretty much, so it really surprised me when my mom told me that's how he reacted. it made me feel so uncaring.. but i know the more tears doesn't mean you care more. blah.. idk what i'm saying. i jjst really wish she was going to be here for the baby... but i know she'll see him anyway.
i have a doctors appointment at 8:20 in the morning... i think i will die tomorrow. die means fall asleep in the back room at work.. and get fired. pam hates me again.. i didn't go to the meeting on sunday so she's being a bitch to me and she only gave me 8 hours next week. whatever... her back room will look like shit and she'll ask me if i can come in more days. haha i am sweet and i win at life.
omgtired.
i can feel it, this week is gonna be a long one.
Summer has come and pass,
the innocent can never last.
Wake me up when September ends.