The song of the shadow of a firebird in winter
Okay, introductions...
...well myself and
gondolinchick01 are, like all good nerds, devourers of literature. (Her especially. There are supercomputers that can't take in data as quickly as she manages to.) as such I often end up getting book recommendations from her and one of the first books she ever told me to get was Winter Rose by Patricia A Mckillip. Say what you want about cliche and overly romantic novels, I was simply hooked on the extremely intricate prose and vivid descriptions the book created.
Three years on and I've just finished reading the first part of the Cygnet duology and, again, whilst being delighted with some shamelessly prosaic and obscenely magical fantasy to relax with I couldn't help but notice there's a very distinct theme to a lot of her works... almost a formula. A certain amount of extremely scientific research later I was able to compile the complete checklist for making your own Patricia A Mckillip story. See what you come up with:
Our story begins in the isolated [big commercial city / small rurual village / large puddle of mud] that is completely removed from any greater sence of a world or nation. Don't even try to do some world building, that's it. In this [city / village / mud] lives a [young / young / very young] [hero / heroine] who is completely removed from the rest of their community. Because of the big void outside the key locations in this story inbreeding is rife and our [hero / heroine] stands out for being the only one with [blond hair / brown hair] and listless eyes, not to mention an even number of toes. They are also blessed with the power of [awesome Garrett-like stealth / potent magical abillities / being dangerously happy] but nobody realises or appreciates this so they are [written off as useless / exploited]. They have one senior [family member / guardian / talking horse] that looks after them and rather inconveniently refuses to tell them about that moment in their heratige that broke hundreds of years of incest.
The author embarks on a tangent involving her strange foot fetish where someone feels uncomfortable with shoes or sustains an injury to their feet. These passages are semi-frequent.
Ignorant of their fate they live an idilic life of [poverty / servitude] is disrupted by the machinations of an [old woman / very old woman / extremely old woman / potential rapist with a small hut] that happens to be [an evil bondage queen / a personified natural pheonomenon with a grudge / a mouldy sandwich someone forgot about ].This draws them in to a confusing and lonely nightmare world by [taking away their family / stripping them of their innocence / making them wear shoes]. This evildoer is of unexplained (and it'll stay that way) origin and is out to satisfy their lust for [power / revenge / souls / making people wear shoes] by means of [duress / hypnotism / LSD] and our protagonist is forced to ally themself with someone of questionable virtue,. (possibly another old woman) whilst trying to find a way to defeat said evil.
At some point in the first or last third they will encounter someone who happens to look a fair bit like them except of the opposite gender. This person changes their perspective on life almost instantly by making them [question their own nature / question the state of morality / extremely horny]. This will cause turmoil in their [family / quest / pants] and there will be at least one other young female of virtue caught up in this web of magic and corruption.
Around here we'll get another foot fetish aside.
In an attempt to combat the evil that threatens the [city / woods / mud] the [hero / heroine] decides the best course of action is to keep wandering blindly in to dangerous places until something happens, and such they do succesfully between 3 and 4 times leaving them [battered / delierious / sexually frustrated]. At some point in this sequence of events either their mysterious counterpart or a third old person who is evil will attempt to betray them. Understandably this leaves our [hero / heroine] horribly depressed and having made things progressively worse for themselves after running through hoops in a strange non-euclidian [house / sewer / woodland] of magic that would make great Cthulhu dizzy both our [hero / heroin] and their counterpart will be [trapped / nearly killed] by the evildoer. Finally, ultimately, [willpower / love / rage] turn up and start kicking some arse leaving the evil vanquished in about as much time as it takes for you to turn a page.
There follows a strange mystical sequence where an attempt to tie up the loose ends of the plot involving some form of romance involving one or both of our strange misfits that leaves the reader that little bit more in the dark than they were before and everyone is upgraded from idilic to portrait status.
Now for the task of translation. As I am a devotee of the great assembler with my computer nerd ways I decided I would serve the powers that can't divide by zero by translating in to binary:
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...well myself and
gondolinchick01 are, like all good nerds, devourers of literature. (Her especially. There are supercomputers that can't take in data as quickly as she manages to.) as such I often end up getting book recommendations from her and one of the first books she ever told me to get was Winter Rose by Patricia A Mckillip. Say what you want about cliche and overly romantic novels, I was simply hooked on the extremely intricate prose and vivid descriptions the book created.
Three years on and I've just finished reading the first part of the Cygnet duology and, again, whilst being delighted with some shamelessly prosaic and obscenely magical fantasy to relax with I couldn't help but notice there's a very distinct theme to a lot of her works... almost a formula. A certain amount of extremely scientific research later I was able to compile the complete checklist for making your own Patricia A Mckillip story. See what you come up with:
Our story begins in the isolated [big commercial city / small rurual village / large puddle of mud] that is completely removed from any greater sence of a world or nation. Don't even try to do some world building, that's it. In this [city / village / mud] lives a [young / young / very young] [hero / heroine] who is completely removed from the rest of their community. Because of the big void outside the key locations in this story inbreeding is rife and our [hero / heroine] stands out for being the only one with [blond hair / brown hair] and listless eyes, not to mention an even number of toes. They are also blessed with the power of [awesome Garrett-like stealth / potent magical abillities / being dangerously happy] but nobody realises or appreciates this so they are [written off as useless / exploited]. They have one senior [family member / guardian / talking horse] that looks after them and rather inconveniently refuses to tell them about that moment in their heratige that broke hundreds of years of incest.
The author embarks on a tangent involving her strange foot fetish where someone feels uncomfortable with shoes or sustains an injury to their feet. These passages are semi-frequent.
Ignorant of their fate they live an idilic life of [poverty / servitude] is disrupted by the machinations of an [old woman / very old woman / extremely old woman / potential rapist with a small hut] that happens to be [an evil bondage queen / a personified natural pheonomenon with a grudge / a mouldy sandwich someone forgot about ].This draws them in to a confusing and lonely nightmare world by [taking away their family / stripping them of their innocence / making them wear shoes]. This evildoer is of unexplained (and it'll stay that way) origin and is out to satisfy their lust for [power / revenge / souls / making people wear shoes] by means of [duress / hypnotism / LSD] and our protagonist is forced to ally themself with someone of questionable virtue,. (possibly another old woman) whilst trying to find a way to defeat said evil.
At some point in the first or last third they will encounter someone who happens to look a fair bit like them except of the opposite gender. This person changes their perspective on life almost instantly by making them [question their own nature / question the state of morality / extremely horny]. This will cause turmoil in their [family / quest / pants] and there will be at least one other young female of virtue caught up in this web of magic and corruption.
Around here we'll get another foot fetish aside.
In an attempt to combat the evil that threatens the [city / woods / mud] the [hero / heroine] decides the best course of action is to keep wandering blindly in to dangerous places until something happens, and such they do succesfully between 3 and 4 times leaving them [battered / delierious / sexually frustrated]. At some point in this sequence of events either their mysterious counterpart or a third old person who is evil will attempt to betray them. Understandably this leaves our [hero / heroine] horribly depressed and having made things progressively worse for themselves after running through hoops in a strange non-euclidian [house / sewer / woodland] of magic that would make great Cthulhu dizzy both our [hero / heroin] and their counterpart will be [trapped / nearly killed] by the evildoer. Finally, ultimately, [willpower / love / rage] turn up and start kicking some arse leaving the evil vanquished in about as much time as it takes for you to turn a page.
There follows a strange mystical sequence where an attempt to tie up the loose ends of the plot involving some form of romance involving one or both of our strange misfits that leaves the reader that little bit more in the dark than they were before and everyone is upgraded from idilic to portrait status.
Now for the task of translation. As I am a devotee of the great assembler with my computer nerd ways I decided I would serve the powers that can't divide by zero by translating in to binary:
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