It seems to me like your major problem is in judging. You're good at not judging others on appearance, but you judge yourself on them. And then you seem at least a little less ready to judge yourself on personality and character, but you judge others harshly on them.
I think also, some of the things you are judging others on, are things that are hard to do when you're less social. When you start getting out more (and I barely left my room either when I was 19, also due to social anxiety, so I think you have a good chance of developing past that over time), you may find yourself behaving in similar ways. (Though staying away from hard drugs is usually a good idea!)
I'm tired and have a cold (which I'm medded up for) so I feel like I may be putting this less tactfully than I usually would. If it came out sounding like something other than trying to help you address some of what you're struggling with, sorry.
You also might want to look for anxiety and depression support groups here on LJ, as well as general mental health ones, and any social groups (book groups, pet groups, etc) that seem like they match your interests. The internet can be a great place to start getting more social, I know some people wouldn't recommend that, but it was my internet socialization that got me ready to start real life social settings and eventually college after becoming more or less a shut-in in my first year of high school. (Just graduated from college last week!)
I think also, some of the things you are judging others on, are things that are hard to do when you're less social. When you start getting out more (and I barely left my room either when I was 19, also due to social anxiety, so I think you have a good chance of developing past that over time), you may find yourself behaving in similar ways. (Though staying away from hard drugs is usually a good idea!)
I'm tired and have a cold (which I'm medded up for) so I feel like I may be putting this less tactfully than I usually would. If it came out sounding like something other than trying to help you address some of what you're struggling with, sorry.
You also might want to look for anxiety and depression support groups here on LJ, as well as general mental health ones, and any social groups (book groups, pet groups, etc) that seem like they match your interests. The internet can be a great place to start getting more social, I know some people wouldn't recommend that, but it was my internet socialization that got me ready to start real life social settings and eventually college after becoming more or less a shut-in in my first year of high school. (Just graduated from college last week!)
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