meh.
UPDATE:
Almost as a testament to the unstableness of my family's calender that I mentioned in my last post, I have been forbidden from returning home this weekend. WHAT THE FUCK FAMILY? [excuse the language].
Necessarily, the plans have reverted to their previous state [I mean, what would be the fun if something actually remained STABLE, right?] and I am left, alone, for the weekend. I was REALLY looking forward to going home, even more so because I originally wasn't going to be able to go, but no. My sister wants to spend the night up here, and I have to accommodate her; my father wants somebody to spend time with at my brothers' games, and I have to accommodate him. Nevermind that I've got a huge project due in my Sem class on Tuesday and need the whole weekend to work on it. Nevermind that I have an essay due for HPS od Science on Tuesday, or the similar essay in MicroBio on Thursday! Never you mind, family I love, that I want to see my friends again, and this time all together because Mattie is going down for the weekend. I'll just sit here like a nice boy and watch the game while I think about how I'm going to get all my shit (pardon) done without the tools, workspace, or materials I need to finish all the things I have to do because of the SCHOOL you HELPED PAY FOR. It's not as if I didn't want to go to school but felt obligated to by my parents, my society and every other influence; it's not as if this is something I was forced into by my environment: I WANTED to spend seven years of my life walking miles to classes I am only taking so my future family won't have anything to worry about.
In other news:
I am living in the past. Of late, this has started to worry me:
I have come to the realization that I rely on others to live in the past with me.
I have also realized that relying on another person to live in the past is dangerous-
What happens if they stop living in the past? It sounds selfish, but what happens
to me?
If I'm spending my present in a life of the past, what happens to my present life if
the life that's present loses all the things I love about the past I live it by?
becomes void of the people I live it with?
How soon will people realize that living in the past will inhibit their future ambitions?
How soon will they vacate the stagnancy of the past and work for their future?
When there's one person left living their past with mine, when do they get bored
and leave?
What happens when you live for something you loved so much, but it doesn't exist anymore?
It was going to be a poem... but ended up as a series of questions. Hmm.
Almost as a testament to the unstableness of my family's calender that I mentioned in my last post, I have been forbidden from returning home this weekend. WHAT THE FUCK FAMILY? [excuse the language].
Necessarily, the plans have reverted to their previous state [I mean, what would be the fun if something actually remained STABLE, right?] and I am left, alone, for the weekend. I was REALLY looking forward to going home, even more so because I originally wasn't going to be able to go, but no. My sister wants to spend the night up here, and I have to accommodate her; my father wants somebody to spend time with at my brothers' games, and I have to accommodate him. Nevermind that I've got a huge project due in my Sem class on Tuesday and need the whole weekend to work on it. Nevermind that I have an essay due for HPS od Science on Tuesday, or the similar essay in MicroBio on Thursday! Never you mind, family I love, that I want to see my friends again, and this time all together because Mattie is going down for the weekend. I'll just sit here like a nice boy and watch the game while I think about how I'm going to get all my shit (pardon) done without the tools, workspace, or materials I need to finish all the things I have to do because of the SCHOOL you HELPED PAY FOR. It's not as if I didn't want to go to school but felt obligated to by my parents, my society and every other influence; it's not as if this is something I was forced into by my environment: I WANTED to spend seven years of my life walking miles to classes I am only taking so my future family won't have anything to worry about.
In other news:
I am living in the past. Of late, this has started to worry me:
I have come to the realization that I rely on others to live in the past with me.
I have also realized that relying on another person to live in the past is dangerous-
What happens if they stop living in the past? It sounds selfish, but what happens
to me?
If I'm spending my present in a life of the past, what happens to my present life if
the life that's present loses all the things I love about the past I live it by?
becomes void of the people I live it with?
How soon will people realize that living in the past will inhibit their future ambitions?
How soon will they vacate the stagnancy of the past and work for their future?
When there's one person left living their past with mine, when do they get bored
and leave?
What happens when you live for something you loved so much, but it doesn't exist anymore?
It was going to be a poem... but ended up as a series of questions. Hmm.