(no subject)

[i_am_kilroy]

well, the outsiders sure had it right.
nothing gold can stay, pony boy.
i crave that this void be filled so badly,
i choose to ignore what's really happening
and only see what i need to see
in order to make my hopes a reality.
and when the delusion doesn't survive,
it doesn't hurt. 
at least not like it would were it real.

i'm not mad at you.
and i must be really thick...
because i still don't totally get it.
it would almost be easier to take if you just weren't into me.
i don't understand what i'm feeling right now.
maybe... empty. definitely lonely...
absolutely wishing we could go back to being naked again soon.

i think when one goes from having nothing,
to the exposure of something new and exciting,
the urge to overindulge is not uncommon...
but i grow weary of such routine.
and other facets of my life need attention.
i just got myself back...

i'm just so tired of sleeping alone.