(no subject)

Aug 08, 2005 23:38


I'm not trying to be all deep in the following, Im just talking. blah blah blah.

Do you ever have something happen to you, big or small, and start questioning the meaning of your life? Not 'life' in general, but just your life, your purpose.

Like. When Im doing anything involved with theatre or film, or when Im applying make-up I think "yes. this is life. this is ME." Thats not only on a career level, but on the passion level, making something your completely passionate about a big part of your life.

Sometimes, Itll just be when Im out with my friends. Even when I was younger..
I was once body-surfing at a Finger 11 concert (haha shutup) when I was 12 or 13.. and I remember having this great feeling and this smile that just wouldnt leave my face.. and I was thinking "wow. moments like this are what life is all about." But that kind of feeling is very temporary. I like thats just called 'fun'. haha.

But today.
I went and visited the dogs at the pound. Now I am uneasy with the thought that all those beautiful and loving dogs are sleeping alone in cold cells tonight while we are all warm in our beds. THEN my mind goes even further and I thinks about the HUMANS who are living like that and worse. People with hearts, and minds, and souls, like us. Dying. Like I said, Im not trying to be deep. Most of the time, I try not to even think about these things. But then when stuff like today happens, I think "Is my purpose to help others?"

Here is my conclusion.
These thoughts I am having are stupid.
Because there is no reason why I cant go through life doing ALL these things. My life will have dual-meaning.

a - Fulfilling one's passions, career aspirations, LOVING what you're getting paid for.
b - Happiness, fun, experiencing different things, making memorable moments, feelings, sensations.
c - Helping others. Love & care. Doing your best to give others the fair chance to experience A and B.

aaaand done.
goodnight all,
- Jess
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