I tend to take it all in good fun. But part of the reason it's not creepy is that I know it's not serious. It's obviously joking.
Most of the time, 'creepy' flirting comes from one of two types of guys:
1. Guys I really don't know well at all who are overly familiar. Touching me, strong sexual innuendo, really suggestive leers, or outright propositions from people I don't know well squick me right the fuck out. The things you say, coming from a *stranger*, would be cause for a little discomfort, but coming as a joke they're harmless.
2. Guys I do know, who know I'm not interested, who continue to hit on me and preface it with statements like, "Oh, if only you were attracted to me," or "Oh, it's just too bad you're not interested, because..." and who mean it. That's the important part on that one, that they're genuinely saying to me, "I know you're not interested in me but *I* think you should be so I'm going to keep pointing out that I like you despite your lack of interest." That makes me decidedly uncomfortable, because it's a disregard of my stated position and it speaks to an underlying, "What you want is less important to me than what I want, and I want to remind you that I think what you want is unfair/unreasonable/irrational as often as possible."
You, as you are and talking to women you have established friendships with, aren't being creepy. You are doing some of the same things 'creepy' guys do, but the intent and the relationship make a lot of difference.
Most of the time, 'creepy' flirting comes from one of two types of guys:
1. Guys I really don't know well at all who are overly familiar. Touching me, strong sexual innuendo, really suggestive leers, or outright propositions from people I don't know well squick me right the fuck out. The things you say, coming from a *stranger*, would be cause for a little discomfort, but coming as a joke they're harmless.
2. Guys I do know, who know I'm not interested, who continue to hit on me and preface it with statements like, "Oh, if only you were attracted to me," or "Oh, it's just too bad you're not interested, because..." and who mean it. That's the important part on that one, that they're genuinely saying to me, "I know you're not interested in me but *I* think you should be so I'm going to keep pointing out that I like you despite your lack of interest." That makes me decidedly uncomfortable, because it's a disregard of my stated position and it speaks to an underlying, "What you want is less important to me than what I want, and I want to remind you that I think what you want is unfair/unreasonable/irrational as often as possible."
You, as you are and talking to women you have established friendships with, aren't being creepy. You are doing some of the same things 'creepy' guys do, but the intent and the relationship make a lot of difference.
Much love,
Rowan
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