This is for you Marybeth
I just wish you could read this.
Dear friend,
I am sorry for all that I did to you. I am sorry for hurting you. I realize now that I was concerned only about myself and doing what I wanted..which usually was boys and things not good for my health. I realized it then but I was to much of a coward to say anything about it. I really don't know what got into my head that day but it was stupid. I should have never done that. You were really one of the few people that I felt I could be myself around. I went throught this whole freak out stage and messed a lot of things up with alot of people, but mainly with you. I don't think telling you I'm sorry is going to fix anything or change how you feel about me. I think it will just give me some since of...I don't know, closer. You should hate me, I treated you like poo. I think about what I did almost everyday and I wish that I had never done it. There are so many things I regret. I miss you and I would love to just come to Alabama and chill with you, see where you are in life. I keep up with you on Lj, but I'd like to see you too. Not to mention Josh would like to see you. Again we hit a sore point. I know how you felt about him, but I don't know what else to say. I just want you to know that I am sorry and I have truly lost a great friend. I will miss you and never listen to music the same. I hope that I'll get enought courage to email this to you soon.
I'm sorry.
I miss you.
~Jana
Dear friend,
I am sorry for all that I did to you. I am sorry for hurting you. I realize now that I was concerned only about myself and doing what I wanted..which usually was boys and things not good for my health. I realized it then but I was to much of a coward to say anything about it. I really don't know what got into my head that day but it was stupid. I should have never done that. You were really one of the few people that I felt I could be myself around. I went throught this whole freak out stage and messed a lot of things up with alot of people, but mainly with you. I don't think telling you I'm sorry is going to fix anything or change how you feel about me. I think it will just give me some since of...I don't know, closer. You should hate me, I treated you like poo. I think about what I did almost everyday and I wish that I had never done it. There are so many things I regret. I miss you and I would love to just come to Alabama and chill with you, see where you are in life. I keep up with you on Lj, but I'd like to see you too. Not to mention Josh would like to see you. Again we hit a sore point. I know how you felt about him, but I don't know what else to say. I just want you to know that I am sorry and I have truly lost a great friend. I will miss you and never listen to music the same. I hope that I'll get enought courage to email this to you soon.
I'm sorry.
I miss you.
~Jana