Carving the slut
My buddy across the LJ board brought up the huge lovely permanently seeping into her flesh words her Owner has on her tits, and what they make her feel like, and it struck me as one of those awesome things like yourfirst orgasm or wearing a wedding ring or cutting your floor length hair.
i know that when Master does it, it's a passionate, heat filled moment that He both desires and fears- He fears slicing me open forever, putting a mark on me that disfigures badly, doing something we both want that someday one of us might regret.
NOT gonna happen at this end.
i don't CARE what He did in former relationships.
i don't CARE if He dies and i live with that forever on my ass.
i don't CARE if He has to leave and i move on, die, or retire from public life.
It's been like almost four years.
i NEED that shit on me now. It's something that i can't get around, i can't get under. It's not some fucking WANT that will go away, it's not something that i desire like a diet coke or a orgasm.
Deeper. Primal. Permanently marked as property, carved into with His name, His intials, His mark.
Last year, at Folsom, He and i did a scene Saturday afternoon (He played with eleven people that day/night- it might well be the hottest convention we have ever been to!) that ended in cum and sweat and tears and spit and blood and semen everywhere- and He used the knife in that last moment before He thrust into me and forced Himself over the edge-
The mark was long and jagged and bleeding and so perfectly wonderful.
It was His need etched on my skin.
It was the power He and i exchange put into steele against FLESH for Gods sake! i broke out in a sweat inside every time i looked at that mark of passion and heat and fucking need and animal TAKING of me.
Better than anything was that feeling. Better for months.
So how do i convey to Him that this is not a want?
It's like the collar thing (more on that another time), except it has no bad scar in my heart to heal first..... it's like the collar feeling was *back in the beginning*.
Slave in me needs this more than air i think. i hope His Beast needs it just as much.
i know that when Master does it, it's a passionate, heat filled moment that He both desires and fears- He fears slicing me open forever, putting a mark on me that disfigures badly, doing something we both want that someday one of us might regret.
NOT gonna happen at this end.
i don't CARE what He did in former relationships.
i don't CARE if He dies and i live with that forever on my ass.
i don't CARE if He has to leave and i move on, die, or retire from public life.
It's been like almost four years.
i NEED that shit on me now. It's something that i can't get around, i can't get under. It's not some fucking WANT that will go away, it's not something that i desire like a diet coke or a orgasm.
Deeper. Primal. Permanently marked as property, carved into with His name, His intials, His mark.
Last year, at Folsom, He and i did a scene Saturday afternoon (He played with eleven people that day/night- it might well be the hottest convention we have ever been to!) that ended in cum and sweat and tears and spit and blood and semen everywhere- and He used the knife in that last moment before He thrust into me and forced Himself over the edge-
The mark was long and jagged and bleeding and so perfectly wonderful.
It was His need etched on my skin.
It was the power He and i exchange put into steele against FLESH for Gods sake! i broke out in a sweat inside every time i looked at that mark of passion and heat and fucking need and animal TAKING of me.
Better than anything was that feeling. Better for months.
So how do i convey to Him that this is not a want?
It's like the collar thing (more on that another time), except it has no bad scar in my heart to heal first..... it's like the collar feeling was *back in the beginning*.
Slave in me needs this more than air i think. i hope His Beast needs it just as much.