That feeling
Remember that feeling when you were a kid and you discovered something that you really liked, and it affected the way you thought and felt for a while, as in days and sometimes weeks? It could've been anything from cartoon characters you really wanted to be friends with, a type of monster, to an alternate social environment that you wished you could belong to. You remember that, right?
I find that one of my possible faults (or quirks, in other people's eyes) is that I'm always looking for the things that will make me feel this way again, at least temporarily. Because they're so far and few in my adult life, I tend to seek out those things that give me that tingly childhood "I'm so in love with this" feeling, and let me tell you it's not easy. I like it when something affects me, when it has an impact, and little seems to do that any more.
But I found something recently. Can't get certain thoughts of it out of my head. It forces me to oogle cute fanart or find possible fanfiction; to daydream and fantasize like a naive youth. Sure, it's just a fictional alien species that I'm swooning over, but who cares? It gives me that long lost feeling and I always like that, even if half of me wants it to sort of go away at the same time. I won't say what it is (too embarrassing), but hey, I thought I'd at least mention it.
I find that one of my possible faults (or quirks, in other people's eyes) is that I'm always looking for the things that will make me feel this way again, at least temporarily. Because they're so far and few in my adult life, I tend to seek out those things that give me that tingly childhood "I'm so in love with this" feeling, and let me tell you it's not easy. I like it when something affects me, when it has an impact, and little seems to do that any more.
But I found something recently. Can't get certain thoughts of it out of my head. It forces me to oogle cute fanart or find possible fanfiction; to daydream and fantasize like a naive youth. Sure, it's just a fictional alien species that I'm swooning over, but who cares? It gives me that long lost feeling and I always like that, even if half of me wants it to sort of go away at the same time. I won't say what it is (too embarrassing), but hey, I thought I'd at least mention it.