Hmm
What the hell, I don't know much anymore, things are looking up, but I'm trying not to get too happy or get my hopes up... I'm beginning to like someone a fucking shitload, and while she says she likes me, I don't know... sometimes I see it, sometimes I don't.. bah, I think too fucking much. I felt loved today though got a call that started "You're so fucking special, I wish I was special..." made my fucking day, especially since who it came from. Thought it was the sweetest thing ever. My luck is I'll find the girl of my dreams, and I'll be her nightmare, the bane of her existence... Oh well, with love I look negatively, works better for me, the whole being neutral thing doesn't work for that, I can only be negative about it until I have it, and then I'm only positive about it... damn, I hope I'm not being played with, not that it would matter, I'd let myself be strung along if I was being played with. Fuck, like I said, I think too much... I'm tired, its 4:30 really, I hate how the time is when you started this, what if it took me 50 days to write it, it would be extremely off... why, I'm surprising someone I'm sure with making an actual post... I haven't done anything but work.. My friend is moving, my only friend in the area... fuck, thats going to suck, but since I drive her every fucking where I'll have some free time for once... thats nice... I think I've rambled enough.