i need guy friends that get along with boyfriends...
seriously...random thought. i decided to start writing here again. mainly so i can keep up with therapy. its kinda draining and about to get a whole lot worse.
anyhow, been in the hospital a lot...that sucked 1100$ for 4 visits in 1.5 weeks. and the 34 doctor visits...atleast therapy is free.
not that it makes a lotta difference.
the show at krafbrau was really good. we got Ryan hatcher and his family about 850$ to help out. they really need it. john said when he told his lady, she started to cry. i feel so bad for them i really do. gah, even i cried. we made about a grand but of course kraftbrau gets their share etc..
i miss kalamazoo. i really do. i really need more friends i kinda wish i could drive but ill be a bum the rest of my life. i need to et my car back from my father so i can sell it. its starting to get kinda old and wanna get rid of it before it takes a dump and is worth nothing. but he is stubborn and lazy and quit his job so he can play warcraft 24/7 lol. gah i love that game.
my belly hurts.:(
its been hurting and seems to be hurting worse ont he new medicine they gave me. but atleast the constant pannick attack seems to be subsiding a lil. i was hoping to get reliefe of feeling crappy this week but i went horse riding almost fell off that bitch made me elbow myself in the ribs cos she was being a stubborn cunt and so now not only do i have a sinus infection from allergies but my liver feels like it was thrown on a breakfast fryer at a mens club.
*sigh*
i need to stop being lazy...i have no inspiration for art or anythign anymore. im really sad too my friend matt is going to school up north. hes my youngest friend. but hes a really good kid and im gonna miss him. i hate how busy he is and i never see/talk to him for months at a time. and i could swear he wasnt graduating yet haha but i guess things slip when your out of the loop. god daMN I THINK MY EARS ARE INFECTED AGAIN! lets hope they dont puss blood and make me deaf for a week this time...shit.
i guess i gotta go anyhow i have to go to the ssi office god damn i hate being poor. i wish i was able to work but i cant because i suck. eh, oh well. i miss living. i miss life. i miss my friends. i miss feeling invincible.
i wish i could fly again.
not that anyone reads...but ciao!
ps, i was supposed to rant about how craig changed his number and i needed to talk to him cos i need help with stuff only he can help with but he changed his number moved away and hates me for life. *MY FAULT* big suprise. damn it. he needs to tell people he changed it cos i feel bad for the kid i called 3 times that laughed at me haha....yea*
anyhow, been in the hospital a lot...that sucked 1100$ for 4 visits in 1.5 weeks. and the 34 doctor visits...atleast therapy is free.
not that it makes a lotta difference.
the show at krafbrau was really good. we got Ryan hatcher and his family about 850$ to help out. they really need it. john said when he told his lady, she started to cry. i feel so bad for them i really do. gah, even i cried. we made about a grand but of course kraftbrau gets their share etc..
i miss kalamazoo. i really do. i really need more friends i kinda wish i could drive but ill be a bum the rest of my life. i need to et my car back from my father so i can sell it. its starting to get kinda old and wanna get rid of it before it takes a dump and is worth nothing. but he is stubborn and lazy and quit his job so he can play warcraft 24/7 lol. gah i love that game.
my belly hurts.:(
its been hurting and seems to be hurting worse ont he new medicine they gave me. but atleast the constant pannick attack seems to be subsiding a lil. i was hoping to get reliefe of feeling crappy this week but i went horse riding almost fell off that bitch made me elbow myself in the ribs cos she was being a stubborn cunt and so now not only do i have a sinus infection from allergies but my liver feels like it was thrown on a breakfast fryer at a mens club.
*sigh*
i need to stop being lazy...i have no inspiration for art or anythign anymore. im really sad too my friend matt is going to school up north. hes my youngest friend. but hes a really good kid and im gonna miss him. i hate how busy he is and i never see/talk to him for months at a time. and i could swear he wasnt graduating yet haha but i guess things slip when your out of the loop. god daMN I THINK MY EARS ARE INFECTED AGAIN! lets hope they dont puss blood and make me deaf for a week this time...shit.
i guess i gotta go anyhow i have to go to the ssi office god damn i hate being poor. i wish i was able to work but i cant because i suck. eh, oh well. i miss living. i miss life. i miss my friends. i miss feeling invincible.
i wish i could fly again.
not that anyone reads...but ciao!
ps, i was supposed to rant about how craig changed his number and i needed to talk to him cos i need help with stuff only he can help with but he changed his number moved away and hates me for life. *MY FAULT* big suprise. damn it. he needs to tell people he changed it cos i feel bad for the kid i called 3 times that laughed at me haha....yea*