Anti-drug urinal cake and fetal vampire sandwich!
Hiya dbroussa
Pro Anti-drug Urinal cakes (those little cakes in the public urinals that extole "Just say No to drugs").
Piss Cakes Inc. has combined urinal cakes with the ability to control the masses. Their first slogan "Don't Use Drugs" was widely accepted. Piss Cakes CEO Robert Pubes states "we're not only making your urinal smell nice, we're washing the threat of drugs down the drain."
Pissing on piss cakes is fun. They bubble and sometimes steam. Now they can even send messages to the mindless masses far too stupid to think for themselves. We should be thankful for Piss Cakes Inc. having thought of it first. Imagine the horror of the tobacco industry having thought of it.
When you are pissing or pooping, you are alone with your thoughts. This is a perfect time to introduce a message for you to mull over in your brain. Piss Cakes wants to send moral messages. They started with anti-drug slogans and intend to move on to slogans like "Call your Mom" and other sweet ideas. Piss cakes may actually make us better as a people... Go piss cakes!
If other companies had thought of it, we may be constantly bombarded with ads swaying us to buy things we don't need or want. The ignorant masses lacking mental fortitude would soon find themselves buying cigarettes and condoms and pepto-dysmal in bulk with no real clue as to why... People are DUMB. Many of them need to be told what to do. Dumb people should not do drugs. They never know when to stop or how much they can handle or how not to get caught or how to make sure they have a source that isnt cutting their coke with sugar or detergent. Urinal cake messages may reach their subconscious and save the lives of those whom would normally be wiped out by darwinism.
Some of my good friends are stupid people, and I am glad that Piss Cakes is doing its part to protect them. On a different note, did you guys catch the last name of the CEO of Piss Cakes? I bet he got picked on in school...
Hiya caydor
Why is the concept of a vampire fetus funny and not sad? Or vice/versa.
Picture this...
A woman is pushing a stroller. The vampiric prince of the city is curious as to how this woman wandered into a very private gathering of the city's most damned citizens. This confident stalker of the night growls at the woman to leave, but she says that she has to stay, her master says so and then she looks towards her stroller. Believing himself untouchable, but conscious of traps, he peers carefully into her stroller, excpecting a bomb, but instead a tiny finger touches his hand. His face twists a bit with confusion as a plump healthy baby with a rattle gurgles up at him and says, "stoo pud."
Too late to realize his mistake, this former master of the undead feels his body ripped from his control. The last thing he sees is the baby shrivel and wither to a half formed shadow of a real child. His mind is closed away and now the evil denizens of the night will now bow before a creature they would normally call an abomination and destroy, as they will believe it to be their leader.
How is that not funny?
That was the character concept I had created for the Cam games before the rules ever specified a minimum age to be turned into a vampy. I had a long and intricate background explaining how the creature was embraced in the womb of a 8 months pregnant woman during an infernalist ritual that was interrupted by the Camarilla vamps. Using malkavian vampiric powers that could alter the way it looked superficially, it would appear as a healthy baby (and Malkies still used the dominate powers back then too). It would have spent a hundred years developing its IQ to normal adult standards because its brain was smaller than a normal adult's, but it was enhanced by vamp blood. It was going to be raised secretly by the vamp that found it. It would eventually ghoul some softhearted woman who would make the mistake of fretting over a lost and dying baby... It would have been amusing.
I can't believe I got shut down because of the fear that the character would offend people. Please. The game is for adults only, 18 or over. People need to grow up and realize tha being attacked by a hungry fetus with two fangs but no other teeth is funny! It's comedy gold in the cheesey B movie industry! I didn't even get a chance to tell people that I was going to occasionally have the vamp fetus hide in the bodies of women that it had ghouled so they would look pregnant, and they could smuggle him anywhere and provide him with shelter all day long. How does he get in them? Reverse C-section, they are ghouled woman so they can heal it afterwards. How does he get out? Ever see Alien? Heh heh heh! The look on people's faces when the storyteller tells them that a fetus leaps out of a pregnant woman's stomach and hops to the floor and then greets them would make it all worthwhile. COMEDY GOLD, I tell you! GOLD!
Pro Anti-drug Urinal cakes (those little cakes in the public urinals that extole "Just say No to drugs").
Piss Cakes Inc. has combined urinal cakes with the ability to control the masses. Their first slogan "Don't Use Drugs" was widely accepted. Piss Cakes CEO Robert Pubes states "we're not only making your urinal smell nice, we're washing the threat of drugs down the drain."
Pissing on piss cakes is fun. They bubble and sometimes steam. Now they can even send messages to the mindless masses far too stupid to think for themselves. We should be thankful for Piss Cakes Inc. having thought of it first. Imagine the horror of the tobacco industry having thought of it.
When you are pissing or pooping, you are alone with your thoughts. This is a perfect time to introduce a message for you to mull over in your brain. Piss Cakes wants to send moral messages. They started with anti-drug slogans and intend to move on to slogans like "Call your Mom" and other sweet ideas. Piss cakes may actually make us better as a people... Go piss cakes!
If other companies had thought of it, we may be constantly bombarded with ads swaying us to buy things we don't need or want. The ignorant masses lacking mental fortitude would soon find themselves buying cigarettes and condoms and pepto-dysmal in bulk with no real clue as to why... People are DUMB. Many of them need to be told what to do. Dumb people should not do drugs. They never know when to stop or how much they can handle or how not to get caught or how to make sure they have a source that isnt cutting their coke with sugar or detergent. Urinal cake messages may reach their subconscious and save the lives of those whom would normally be wiped out by darwinism.
Some of my good friends are stupid people, and I am glad that Piss Cakes is doing its part to protect them. On a different note, did you guys catch the last name of the CEO of Piss Cakes? I bet he got picked on in school...
Hiya caydor
Why is the concept of a vampire fetus funny and not sad? Or vice/versa.
Picture this...
A woman is pushing a stroller. The vampiric prince of the city is curious as to how this woman wandered into a very private gathering of the city's most damned citizens. This confident stalker of the night growls at the woman to leave, but she says that she has to stay, her master says so and then she looks towards her stroller. Believing himself untouchable, but conscious of traps, he peers carefully into her stroller, excpecting a bomb, but instead a tiny finger touches his hand. His face twists a bit with confusion as a plump healthy baby with a rattle gurgles up at him and says, "stoo pud."
Too late to realize his mistake, this former master of the undead feels his body ripped from his control. The last thing he sees is the baby shrivel and wither to a half formed shadow of a real child. His mind is closed away and now the evil denizens of the night will now bow before a creature they would normally call an abomination and destroy, as they will believe it to be their leader.
How is that not funny?
That was the character concept I had created for the Cam games before the rules ever specified a minimum age to be turned into a vampy. I had a long and intricate background explaining how the creature was embraced in the womb of a 8 months pregnant woman during an infernalist ritual that was interrupted by the Camarilla vamps. Using malkavian vampiric powers that could alter the way it looked superficially, it would appear as a healthy baby (and Malkies still used the dominate powers back then too). It would have spent a hundred years developing its IQ to normal adult standards because its brain was smaller than a normal adult's, but it was enhanced by vamp blood. It was going to be raised secretly by the vamp that found it. It would eventually ghoul some softhearted woman who would make the mistake of fretting over a lost and dying baby... It would have been amusing.
I can't believe I got shut down because of the fear that the character would offend people. Please. The game is for adults only, 18 or over. People need to grow up and realize tha being attacked by a hungry fetus with two fangs but no other teeth is funny! It's comedy gold in the cheesey B movie industry! I didn't even get a chance to tell people that I was going to occasionally have the vamp fetus hide in the bodies of women that it had ghouled so they would look pregnant, and they could smuggle him anywhere and provide him with shelter all day long. How does he get in them? Reverse C-section, they are ghouled woman so they can heal it afterwards. How does he get out? Ever see Alien? Heh heh heh! The look on people's faces when the storyteller tells them that a fetus leaps out of a pregnant woman's stomach and hops to the floor and then greets them would make it all worthwhile. COMEDY GOLD, I tell you! GOLD!