My eldritch stalker is...
Fairy Godstepfather
5 Danger, 3 Reality, 10 Controllability, and 1 Obsessiveness
Benevolent, Unreal, Controllable, and Random. The Fairy Godstepfather has your best interests at heart, pretty much, but he can't work up quite the same level of concern as his wife. So yeah, he'll grant your stupid wish, but he'll damn well finish his cigar first.
"In my day, we didn't have goddamn fancy-dress parties."
My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
You scored higher than 99% on Danger
You scored higher than 99% on Reality
You scored higher than 99% on Control
You scored higher than 99% on Obsessiveness
Link: The Eldritch Stalker Test written by fnordite on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the 32-Type Dating Test