(no subject)
It's been awhile since I updated. It's funny how when i'm sad or confused this is the first place i turn to to spit out my feelings. One of my friends said recently she liked being able to almost have a discussion with herself and i agree. this journal has nothing to do with reads it or comments on it, but how after i sit here and spew my heart and soul, i feel better.
though i do like the comments :-)
But anyways i went to the movies tonight and realized just... a bunch of stuff. love, life andrew... i really loved him, and he lied so much to me. and me being the young naive girl i was didn't see it. but how different am i from that little naive girl? i'm really not. if i were to redo the relationship knowing everything except what i learned tonight i would do it all exactly the same. nothing would change. i would still fuck myself over once again.
anyways i'm off to cry some more. i should be over this. it's been almost a year and half. but i gave so much of myself to him, how am i ever supposed to get that back?
though i do like the comments :-)
But anyways i went to the movies tonight and realized just... a bunch of stuff. love, life andrew... i really loved him, and he lied so much to me. and me being the young naive girl i was didn't see it. but how different am i from that little naive girl? i'm really not. if i were to redo the relationship knowing everything except what i learned tonight i would do it all exactly the same. nothing would change. i would still fuck myself over once again.
anyways i'm off to cry some more. i should be over this. it's been almost a year and half. but i gave so much of myself to him, how am i ever supposed to get that back?