ah...i'm listening to brahm's german requiem as i'm reading and writing this. your grandpa will go on in more ways than you realize. you'll remember him. you'll make your own stories with him and your grandma.
and trust me...i know about the inability to talk to my friends and secluding myself from my friends. it's not your fault and it's not their fault. holy cow, i am so confused right now, too. and it's ok. we're all at confusing times in our lives...we just left our home, our high school. some of us will reinvent ourselves, some of us will lose ourselves, some of us will carry on like we were made for it. but don't run from the change. you have to take it as a grain of salt because we're all growing now... and as for the inability to talk to my friends. well. that's a can of worms that i don't know how to deal with. half the time it feels like no one cares what i have to say and the other half it feels like i really just don't want people to know what how i feel about things.
i don't think there's anything wrong with how you're feeling. i don't wish it to stop. i believe that you can overcome it and become stronger. i won't get angry with you, i won't ignore your until you get past your little "mood swing" as my mother likes to pretend that they are...i won't belittle you or it, and i won't regret anything that you do or say. this is an important time of your life. jon would want you to live in it, but i want to you look a little through it. think about the kind of person you want to be. yes. i love you nicole.
i sent you a really meaningless letter, and here is my post-script:
and then they all got drunk and none of them are who i thought they were. good times. laura de st. croix and i were the only sober ones and the small gathering of like 11 people. sobriety power!
your grandpa will go on in more ways than you realize. you'll remember him. you'll make your own stories with him and your grandma.
and trust me...i know about the inability to talk to my friends and secluding myself from my friends. it's not your fault and it's not their fault. holy cow, i am so confused right now, too. and it's ok. we're all at confusing times in our lives...we just left our home, our high school. some of us will reinvent ourselves, some of us will lose ourselves, some of us will carry on like we were made for it.
but don't run from the change. you have to take it as a grain of salt because we're all growing now...
and as for the inability to talk to my friends. well. that's a can of worms that i don't know how to deal with. half the time it feels like no one cares what i have to say and the other half it feels like i really just don't want people to know what how i feel about things.
i don't think there's anything wrong with how you're feeling. i don't wish it to stop. i believe that you can overcome it and become stronger. i won't get angry with you, i won't ignore your until you get past your little "mood swing" as my mother likes to pretend that they are...i won't belittle you or it, and i won't regret anything that you do or say. this is an important time of your life. jon would want you to live in it, but i want to you look a little through it. think about the kind of person you want to be. yes. i love you nicole.
i sent you a really meaningless letter, and here is my post-script:
and then they all got drunk and none of them are who i thought they were. good times. laura de st. croix and i were the only sober ones and the small gathering of like 11 people. sobriety power!
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