(no subject)
you all know that i dont post very often...only when somethings going on...when i really need to purge something thats weighing on me:
i promised myself - after sarah, after nicole - that i would NEVER open myself up to anyone. i was convinced that becomming that vulnerable for a sense of elation was stupid. after all, theyre not infinate. the people who claimed to care for me just didnt one day. i didnt want anything to do with love.
i thought i was in love with both of them. but i concluded, after mulling it over for a few months, that was not. i was happy. i wasnt that vulnerable to them, after all. i still did not want anything to do with it. but then she came along and just took my breath away. she had a wonderful son. she was amazing too...she told me she loved me and i fell for it. she had me hook, line and sinker. she took that away. and now i am broken.
...and i still love her more than anything in this world.
i promised myself - after sarah, after nicole - that i would NEVER open myself up to anyone. i was convinced that becomming that vulnerable for a sense of elation was stupid. after all, theyre not infinate. the people who claimed to care for me just didnt one day. i didnt want anything to do with love.
i thought i was in love with both of them. but i concluded, after mulling it over for a few months, that was not. i was happy. i wasnt that vulnerable to them, after all. i still did not want anything to do with it. but then she came along and just took my breath away. she had a wonderful son. she was amazing too...she told me she loved me and i fell for it. she had me hook, line and sinker. she took that away. and now i am broken.
...and i still love her more than anything in this world.