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Whenever I start to write on this thing, I start to feel like I've forgotten how to express myself and all I can talk about are problems I'm having that probably everybody else is.
I think I'm going to make a list of people I want to call this summer and that can be my goal. There are so many people I have been thinking about. I'm wondering what is the root of this laziness I feel when it comes to keeping up with friendships or even making new friends. I think I'm afraid of my social awkwardness and not having anything to talk about. It may also have something to do with waking up in the morning and feeling very dull-knowing that if I go out with someone who doesn't know me well enough I'll have to try and be likable and clever-I honestly never feel up to pulling that off. I really am neither of those things unless I'm with someone who brings them out in me.
I think I'm going to make a list of people I want to call this summer and that can be my goal. There are so many people I have been thinking about. I'm wondering what is the root of this laziness I feel when it comes to keeping up with friendships or even making new friends. I think I'm afraid of my social awkwardness and not having anything to talk about. It may also have something to do with waking up in the morning and feeling very dull-knowing that if I go out with someone who doesn't know me well enough I'll have to try and be likable and clever-I honestly never feel up to pulling that off. I really am neither of those things unless I'm with someone who brings them out in me.