Final Resolution in a nutshell
PRESHOW MATCHES WHICH I DIDN'T WATCH.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gen. Next vs. Bentley, Sabin, Dutt.
Sabin looks like he was in a three way with clippers and bleach, and totally lost. Alex Shelley's hair isn't looking so hot either. Wait, Shelley ALWAYS looks hot. Silly me. And Bentley's hair is SHINY. Guess it runs in his family.
A winner is: Gen. Next, bitch. Okay, so they aren't called that, but it's still real to me, dammit.
The James Gang vs. Diamonds In The Rough.
Just call the the NAO and get sued already, you fools.
A winner is: The James Age Ganglaws. You didn't think Diamonds in the Rough were going to WIN, did you?
AJ Styles vs. Tanahashi.
CATCH THAT SHANNON, DAMMIT!!!! GRAB HIM BY THE MOEHAWK!!!
Raven vs. Waltman
Raven is winning.
Ref gets knocked out.
Zbyscamofo becomes crooked ref.
Waltmam wins but he really doesn't.
Cassidy Riley cries because TNA management has stolen his boyfriend.
I'm telling you, Raven's GAY!
A winner is: Waltman
The Troof vs. Bobby Roode.
Troof is winning.
Konnan out.
Troof no longer winning.
A winner is: Bobby Roode.
Abyss vs. Rhino
ABYSS = RATINGS, DAMMIT!! RATINGS RATINGS RATINGS!!!
A winner is: Abyss. TAKE THAT RHINO!!!
AMW vs. Team 3-D
Alright, who let Dusty back on TNA's booking team? POWDER IN THE EYES! SWITCH OF THE PIN COVERS!!
A winner is: AMW
Samoa Joe vs. Daniels
Samoa Joe: JOE SMASH!!!
Daniels: Must... save.. boyfriend.. *throws in towel, literally*
DING DING DING.
A winner is: Joe
Sting & Christian vs Shiny Shirt and El Asso Whipo.
You marked for Sting. ADMIT IT.
A winner is: Sting and Christian.
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gen. Next vs. Bentley, Sabin, Dutt.
Sabin looks like he was in a three way with clippers and bleach, and totally lost. Alex Shelley's hair isn't looking so hot either. Wait, Shelley ALWAYS looks hot. Silly me. And Bentley's hair is SHINY. Guess it runs in his family.
A winner is: Gen. Next, bitch. Okay, so they aren't called that, but it's still real to me, dammit.
The James Gang vs. Diamonds In The Rough.
Just call the the NAO and get sued already, you fools.
A winner is: The James Age Ganglaws. You didn't think Diamonds in the Rough were going to WIN, did you?
AJ Styles vs. Tanahashi.
CATCH THAT SHANNON, DAMMIT!!!! GRAB HIM BY THE MOEHAWK!!!
Raven vs. Waltman
Raven is winning.
Ref gets knocked out.
Zbyscamofo becomes crooked ref.
Waltmam wins but he really doesn't.
Cassidy Riley cries because TNA management has stolen his boyfriend.
I'm telling you, Raven's GAY!
A winner is: Waltman
The Troof vs. Bobby Roode.
Troof is winning.
Konnan out.
Troof no longer winning.
A winner is: Bobby Roode.
Abyss vs. Rhino
ABYSS = RATINGS, DAMMIT!! RATINGS RATINGS RATINGS!!!
A winner is: Abyss. TAKE THAT RHINO!!!
AMW vs. Team 3-D
Alright, who let Dusty back on TNA's booking team? POWDER IN THE EYES! SWITCH OF THE PIN COVERS!!
A winner is: AMW
Samoa Joe vs. Daniels
Samoa Joe: JOE SMASH!!!
Daniels: Must... save.. boyfriend.. *throws in towel, literally*
DING DING DING.
A winner is: Joe
Sting & Christian vs Shiny Shirt and El Asso Whipo.
You marked for Sting. ADMIT IT.
A winner is: Sting and Christian.
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!!