Just Because You Don't Want It (Doesn't Mean You Don't Need It); Merlin Modern AU
Title: Just Because You Don't Want It (Doesn't Mean You Don't Need It)
Authors: mydoctortennant
Pairings/Characters: Arthur/Gwen, Gwen/Lance (o.O), Merlin, Morgana and introducing music sensation Caerleon (Members: Leon on Guitar, Gwaine on Bass and Percy on drums)
Warnings: Illusions of a sexual nature and language.
Disclaimer: Not real. Despite birthday wishes and night time prayers to Santa (all Hail Amy Pond!) Merlin still isn't mine!
Rating: MA15
Summary: Sometimes help comes from the most unexpected of places, even when you don't want it.
Author Notes: Written for ella_rose88 and beta'd by sgmajorshipper. Yes, Caerleon are inspired by my boys (for those that don't follow my obsessions that would be McFly) and I'm not ashamed to admit it XD
My Merlin Prompt Table 2010 :: 2011
Part One
A month later and Arthur was at behind his desk at the label offices. The studio was in the basement with his office above it on the ground floor; all of it soundproofed so he couldn’t hear anything. He leant back in his seat on two legs of his chair and put his feet on his desk. He was reading through a new proposal Morgana had presented him with that morning.
She was busy downstairs, working with Gwen of all people.
Over the last few weeks he had slowly worn her down; he kept going until she gave in just so he would shut up and stop giving her a nightly headache.
Morgana had come to the conclusion over the last couple of days that Gwen was good, but she did need a few other members to make up the rest of her ‘band’. They wanted her to adopt a set line-up. That way they could bond. They could write together, perform together. They’d have to get along well to travel so closely. It would have to be well planned. They already had a list of potentials they could use.
That was what they were working on now. Together they were talking to the ‘maybes’ whittling out those who Gwen instantly clicked with and those who she didn’t.
Arthur’s phone rang on his desk, making him jump out of his skin. He nearly fell backwards out of his chair, he flailed and grabbed out for the wooden top. He grabbed out for the phone quickly, his heart pounding in his chest, “Arthur,” he answered.
”We’re done.” Morgana announced and hung up.
Arthur abandoned his papers on his desk and left. He had people to hire and contracts to send out, but he needed to meet with Morgana first. Then Merlin.
Merlin needed in on this too.
X
There was something about having a roommate that made Arthur neater; after Gwen had moved in, his room had suddenly become immaculate. He washed up, he piled magazines, he put his books back on the shelves and didn’t leave towels in the middle of the bathroom floor.
He’d even started eating properly. He couldn’t look like he lived on Chinese take-out every night now, he had a substantial meal that he occasionally cooked for himself; much like now.
“How is everything going?” Arthur asked; he knew perfectly well that they had started laying tracks down left, right and centre. She got along well with her new musicians and everything seemed to be going well; or so Morgana said, but Arthur had learnt over the years to take what she said with a pinch of salt.
“So far so good. They’ve picked up the songs, made them better with their suggestions. We’ve got a good few tracks recorded now, so hopefully it’ll work. Merlin’s been giving us new ideas all over the place, which has been amazing.”
“So I was right, you should be with us.”
Gwen looked at him with a raised eyebrow but a smile soon broke out on her face, “If that’s what you want to hear, Arthur, yes, you were right.”
He smiled down at her. Slowly it disappeared, but he was still looking at her, studying her face as she too looked at him. The silence became awkward and Arthur cleared his throat. Gwen looked away down to the pots and pans he had on the hob bubbling away.
“What are we having?”
“Wondrous delight called ‘spagbol’ but we were out of ‘spag’ so it’s more of a ‘pasbol’.”
Gwen laughed, “I’m sure it’ll be just as good.”
“It will be better.”
X
Swivel chairs were invented by the gods for days like this. The type of day that moved so slowly, giving you all the time in the world when you just couldn’t get anything done. A lanky man in his twenties was sat in one, now spinning around aimlessly. Gwen was off on her lunch and Morgana was in a meeting with Arthur.
Merlin should have been doing his work. He should have been mixing tracks like he had been all morning, but it had gotten to the point now where he was fed up of hearing the same verse, over and over.
Freya was sat in the studio still. She was plucking away at her bass strings, practising for the song she was meant to record in the afternoon. She was quiet, ridiculously so, but talented. Merlin wasn’t sure how she was fair when it came to touring, but for now she was a perfect arrangement. She added a lot to a song by simply playing around with the conventions of a bass line.
She looked up from her bass and caught Merlin’s eye from where he had stopped spinning and was watching her play. She smiled at him meekly, a pink dusting over her cheek creeping over her ears as well. He offered her a thumbs-up and she laughed and mouthed a thank you.
X
The second time Arthur stood in an audience watching Gwen perform it was in a much better venue. She’d recorded part of her album now and was testing the songs out on an audience that was interested in her and some that weren’t. They were the ones they aimed to impress; if they left the venue speaking her name they knew they’d done it.
So far so good. The crowd had been receptive to the three songs she had played already and all eyes were on the stage waiting for more.
Gwen looked across to Arthur who was sat by the bar. He nodded at her and raised his glass. She grinned and plucked at her guitar strings to begin her fourth song.
X
At the bar at the end of the show, before Gwen could reach Arthur to get the low-down she was intercepted by another man. He was of a similar height to Arthur but was in every way different. His hair was dark, black in the lack of light in the club. He was unshaven and darker skinned.
“You were amazing tonight,” he greeted with a polite smile.
“Thank you,” she didn’t try to push past him. His eyes were kind, his body language wasn’t imposing and he seemed like a nice guy.
“Lance,” he introduced and held out his hand, she took it and shook it firmly.
“Gwen,” she said out of common courtesy. It was still a foreign concept to her that anybody might know her name.
“It’s nice to meet you.”
“You too.”
From his seat beside the bar Arthur watched the exchange as the DJ started his set in the background, the thumping music grating through his mind. He’d never liked clubs over pubs for that precise reason. Still, it didn’t seem to bother Gwen as she accepted a dance from the dark and moderately handsome stranger who had approached her.
Arthur clenched his jaw. He downed the rest of his drink and slammed his glass down on the bar, “’Nother?” the barman enquired. Arthur declined with a shake of his head. He threw down a twenty pound note and left
He didn’t need to watch this hurrah and he had a bottle of wine at home in the fridge.
X
Despite the threat of a heavy hang over, Arthur forced himself out of bed at the usual time. He had a meeting with Morgana about a potential new solo artist that she wanted to sign to the label. Apparently it was some young kid who had ‘one hell of a voice’. It was typical Morgana. Anything she could market as a poster boy and she would do it. Half the time she was right though, so he would see it through.
He walked into the kitchen only wearing a pair of grey jogging bottoms. He stopped in his tracks when he realised he wasn’t alone. Before him stood a black haired, olive skinned man with a spattering of designer fuzz on his chin, “Who the hell are you?” Arthur asked reaching for a spare t-shirt that he had abandoned on the back of the sofa.
“I could ask you the same thing,” the bloke answered calmly. Arthur already wanted to punch him. The urge to do so heightened when he noticed that he was only wearing his boxers and last night’s too-tight t-shirt.
“This is my flat,” Arthur stated, and crossed his arms across his cheat and glared at him.
An acute fear filled the stranger’s eyes and he looked Arthur up and down, “You’re Gwen’s boyfriend?” he asked with a minor lack in confidence. He wouldn’t deny that the blonde did look like he could knock him for six should he say the wrong thing.
“What? No. We live together,” he answered as if it were the most normal thing in all the world.
“Oookay, I’m going to go now,” the stranger said with his cup of coffee in his hands and slinked back towards Gwen’s bedroom. Arthur’s jaw clenched. He poured himself a cup of he bitter liquid and downed it as quickly as he could.
Gwen’s bedroom door opened again and closed equally as quickly with Gwen appearing in front of him. It looked as though she had dressed for his benefit.
Arthur regarded her with wide eyes and took a long gulp from his new cup of coffee, “What the hell was that?” he confronted. He was all for her having a life but he didn’t particularly want to walk in on her sex partner the next morning.
“What?” Gwen said, she looked a cross between taken-aback and offended. She stopped in her path to the kettle to make herself a cup of tea, “I’m not allowed a sex life?” she asked. She was a musician, weren’t they all meant to be love, sex and rock ‘n’ roll? It wasn’t like she slept around. Besides, Lance was the first person she had ever brought back to the flat.
“Not with that guy.”
“What’s wrong with Lance?”
Arthur really didn’t know, there was just a vibe that he got radiating from the bloke that he didn’t like, “There’s something creepy about him that I don’t trust.”
“You spoke to him for a minute,” she said with a frown, “what would you know?”
“Did you speak to him much longer?”
“Oh fuck off, Arthur, like you’re any better.”
“At least I don’t pretend that it means anything.”
“I’m not pretending anything.”
“No? Then why are you acting defensive?” he crossed his arms over his chest and stood as tall as he could.
“I’m not.”
“Yeah, you are.”
“Look, I’m gunna go,” the roommates turned around to look in the direction of the voice. Gwen attempted a smile at him but it never reached her eyes, “I don’t want to get in the way.”
“You’re not,” Gwen said trying to sound convincing.
“I’m getting in the way of something,” he said and promptly left.
There was a pregnant silence between the pair of them. Gwen glared at him, “Thanks for that.”
“I’m sure you’ll have many happy times together,” Arthur replied sarcastically and walked towards his room.
Gwen grabbed one of the cushions from the sofa and launched it in his direction. It hit his closed bedroom door. She growled and kicked the back of the sofa with her bare foot, “Owh,” she pouted and rubbed her toes, “Wanker.”
X
The weeks passed quickly. The tension in the Pendragon flat didn’t pass easily.
The silences that had once become comfortable were once again filled to the brim with anger and hatred that made the habitat an impossible place to stay for a prolonged period of time.
After the success of her show gave Gwen a boost in her previously lagging confidence, she found herself more inspired than ever to write. At this rate she would have an all too long list of songs that she could use on the album.
Arthur stayed up in his office more.
Morgana and Merlin had started to relay the information between them if they needed to communicate at all. All Arthur needed to know was it was going well. Apart from that, the welfare of his acts was nothing to do with him.
Gwen had taken to staying in her room once she’d gotten home. She spent so much time at the studio that Arthur had started to beat her home nearly everyday.
If they ever crossed paths she would offer him a cup of tea or coffee or make painful small talk. It was getting to the point of ridiculousness.
If the papers cared enough they would have reported the fear of a lover’s tiff by now, not that they were anywhere near correct.
The singer found it easier to throw herself into her work than face the problems they were going through. She bonded with her new band mates from Will the drummer to Freya; whom Merlin seemingly bonded with quite nicely too. They were both completely loveable people, both of whom Gwen still needed to know better, but she always had time for them should they need her.
X
Gwen removed her headphones and hung them over the microphone stand. The door unclicked and was pushed open by a familiar face, “Hey,” she greeted as she found herself pulled into a warm embrace and kissed lightly on the lips. She grinned up at him; he had started coming to see her every day on his lunch break.
Gwaine teased her that it was getting serious now that that had started to happen but she just ignored him. She’d only known Lance for a couple of weeks. She didn’t know all that much about him yet.
From the production counter two figures remained stationery watching them; “You shouldn’t live with her any more. It’s not good for you.” Morgana stated. She made sure that the microphone into the studio was muted. Gwen shouldn’t hear what she was about to say from her over Arthur.
“You think I don’t know that?” he said inching the bridge of his nose between his finger and thumb and shook his head, “What do I do, Morgana?”
“Tell her the truth or kick her out. Maybe both, if neither of those gets the pair of you laid with each other.”
“He shouldn’t be here. He’s not good forher writing process.”
“Doesn’t help that you’re jealous of him.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Just fucking tell her you love her, Arthur. Is it really that hard?” Merlin inputted as he entered with a foot long sandwich from the sandwich shop and a cookie in a paper bag that he threw in Morgana’s direction.
“You told him?”
“As if,” Merlin laughed taking his seat next to the manager, “It was easy to see.”
“So you leapt to a conclusion?”
“Noooo… he took a tiny step and there conclusions were,” she said as she slid the cookie out of the paper packaging and took a large bite.
“Fuck the pair of you.”
“Ewh, no. Bad mental image,” Morgana complained screwing her eyes shut against the thought.
X
It wasn’t something that Arthur had ever done before, waited in the dark like a bit of a creep for a woman to come to him. It all seemed a little wrong, but this couldn’t wait any longer.
She was spending day after day late in the studio recording, getting the work done so the album could be released on time; a rare occurrence for nearly all bands. The more time she spent there, the more time Lance spent their and the more time Arthur spent in his office away from them. He didn’t want to see it.
He should have told Gwen something about inappropriate behaviour but knowing she would only call him on it anyway. Question him within an inch of his mental capability then take the final inch when she left him hanging once again.
Arthur heard the jangle of her keys and the scratch of metal against metal as she missed the lock the first time before she turned the lock to free the door, “I’m home!” she announced. She didn’t log that Arthur was sat in the main room as she walked in.
“I can see that,” he said with a tug of a smile.”
“Christ, Arthur, you scared me!” she exclaimed placing her hand against her chest as she heaved a breath.
“Sorry.”
“What you sitting in the dark for?” she asked flicking the light switch on, “Practising being a creeper?”
“It got dark whilst I was sat here and I couldn’t be bothered to move.”
“It got dark three hours ago.”
“Really?” she nodded, “Oh.”
“What’s on your mind?” he shook his head, “Oh come on, Arthur. I know you, you wouldn’t just sit there for three hours and not move if you weren’t thinking about something.”
“You,” he said nearly cutting her off.
“Me.”
“How I-“
“Arthur-“
“-feel about you-“
“-please.”
“I love you,” he said looking straight at her.
Her jaw dropped, she failed to speak for a second, her mouth moving like a guppy. She closed her eyes and shook away his ridiculous words, “I’m with Lance.”
“I’ll wait for you, as long as it takes.”
“This isn’t some whim; I’m in this for keeps.”
“He doesn’t love you.”
“Maybe not. But I didn’t say I loved him either.”
“In it for keeps without love? What’s the point?” he gesticulated wildly, waving his arms around in the air beside his head.
“I’m not just going to sleep with him and move on, Arthur. I’m not like that.”
“He is.”
“You don’t know him.”
“I know his type.”
“And I know yours. I know you. You don’t love me.”
“You obviously don’t know me that well then, do you?” he left her with her thoughts, shutting himself in his bedroom without turning on his light. He moved across the room, not ridding himself of any clothing before he collapsed on top of his duvet, head buried in his pillows as he willed his body to sleep.
X
Gwen closed down her studio, putting away her guitars and locking them in the cupboard so she wouldn’t have to carry them back and forth to the flat overnight. She didn’t want to ask Arthur to help after the week before. They had been deathly silent in the flat for most of the weekend. As far as she was aware she was the last one there, apart from the security guard who would eventually lock her out.
She departed down the corridor towards the side entrance of the building, passing one of the other studios. The door was ajar, which was bizarre, usually they were all locked once left unattended and there was no stream of light coming from inside. Gwen heard the crash of a symbol colliding with the floor violently drift from the studio.
She jumped; “Hello?”
She edged towards the open door. She pushed on the wood allowing it so slowly drift open.
The sight before her wasn’t one she had imagined.
Words escaped her, “Gwen-“
“No,” she shook her head and exhaled through her mouth, “He told me not to trust you,” she declared turning away from the sight displayed to her and briskly walking down te corridor.
“Gwen!” a firm hand grabbed her arm and tugged her around, “Gwen, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? You were fucking my band mate in our fucking studio and you’re sorry!?” she shouted yanking her arm from his grasp, “I should have listened to Arthur about you,” she said tears brimming in her eyes.
“What did he tell you, huh? How much of a wanker I must be for showing an interest in you? You know he only says that bull because he wants you for himself.”
“At least he wants me!” she argued back pushing back oh his chest to distance him from her and ran out of the studio door and out onto the street where her taxi was waiting to take her home.
X
The front door slammed shut, vibrating through the entire wall and alerting Arthur to her presence. The secondary slamming of her bedroom door was what pushed him into action. He pushed out from his home studio and headed straight towards his door.
He edged up to Gwen’s door and listened. He could hear the occasional sob and her breaths hitching in her throat; “Guinevere?” she didn’t answer, “Gwen?”
“Leave me alone, Arthur.”
“What’s wrong?” he called through the door.
“Nothing.”
“Guinevere, I’m coming in, okay?” she didn’t deny him so he turned the handle, opening the door. She was sat on the edge of her bed with her back to him. He’d never had much experience with crying girls. The only woman he had contact with, apart from Gwen, was Morgana and he’d only see her cry once when they were younger. He’d been the cause of her tears, so he’d never had to deal with them.
He sat down beside her, “What happened?”
“Doesn’t matter,” she said, wiping the tears from her cheeks.
“If its making you cry, then obviously it does,” Arthur wrapped his arm around her shoulder, bringing her into his chest. She sniffed, fisted her hand in his shirt.
“I trusted him. You told me not to, but I ignored you,” she said through her tears, her nose starting to run. She wiped at it with the back of her hand, “I should have listened to you; God, to everybody. Even Gwaine told me to leave him; told me he was bad news.”
He gently rocked her back and forth, running his hand over her hair trying to be soothing. She cried into is chest for a good five minutes before her sobs started to subside.
“I’ve given you patches on your shirt,” she said through her tears, she rubbed the wet patch and straightened his collar. She was very aware of his lack of tie and undone buttons. She caught his bare skin with the end of her fingers. She sniffed and wiped the tear tracks away again. She flattened her hand over the material she’s crumpled in her fist moments before.
She looked him in the eye for the first time since he’d come into her room. She hadn’t realised how close he was. How easy it would be to-
She cupped his jaw and within the next moment she kissed him once; a light peck on his bottom lip. He didn’t get a chance to respond before she kissed him once again, this time a little more harshly. Arthur would be lying if he had said he didn’t want this; he more than wanted it, but he didn’t want it like this.
He leant away from her, and took her hand away from his cheek, “You don’t want this.”
“You don’t know what I want,” she replied sharply.
“Then I don’t want it,” he said standing up and moving away from her, “Not like this,” he left abruptly and shut her door behind him. He kept a hold of the door handle and leant against the wood. He resisted the urge to swear loudly and crossed the corridor into his room.
He shut his door and leant against it and sighed. He pinched the bridge of his nose. He didn’t want it to happen like this. Not when she’d been using his shirt as a tissue. He just needed to give her time.
X
A persistent knocking on her bedroom door roused her from her personal recording session. She unplugged her headphones from the keyboard and headed to the door, wrapping the cord around her wrist as she walked.
She unlocked her door and pulled it open. She clapped eyes on her intruder and she stepped aside to let her in; “I didn’t think you’d answer,” Gwen shrugged, “Arthur’s worried about you.”
“That’s nice of him.”
“Gwen, you’ve not come out for days. You should be down in the studio but you’re here, cooped up in your room like a hermit. You’re not eating.”
“Morgana, I’m not in the mood for this,” she said sitting back in her seat. She swivelled around back to facing Morgana. She unwound the cable from her wrist and started to play with it. It was taking all her willpower not to cut off Morgana’s words by plugging her headphones back in and going back to work.
“Well get in the mood for it. You have an album to record and a deadline to keep to.”
“Then I give up. I don’t need it.”
“Gwen, for god’s sake; grow up. It’s not the first time people have gone through this.”
“Are you done?” Gwen looked up from her seat, she caught Morgana’s icy glare, “I was in the middle of something.”
“Singing angry break-up written songs, yeah, I heard. That’s not you, Gwen. You don’t sing about that crap. That’s why you’ve been successful. You’re not like everybody else.”
“Yet like everybody else I get hurt, can you please just leave me alone? Maybe I just need to vent.”
“He’s not worth this.”
“I get it, Morgana, I do. Your brother made it perfectly clear. I just need to be left alone.”
“You’ve got until Monday. Then I want you back in that studio or I will drag you there myself,” she warned seriously. She took off out of Gwen’s door. It was another ten seconds before Gwen heard the front door slam and she was alone again.
x
Monday came around quickly. Gwen rose miraculously happy that morning. She stretched and for the first time since she’d caught Lance with another woman she smiled. She grabbed her guitar from the corner of the room and left as quickly as she could, still in her pyjamas. Nobody at the studio dared to judge. If he was more comfortable in her pyjamas they let her be.
She spent her day recording, happily redoing songs she wanted to try in new ways. Her mind was set on the job, she could do this and she could enjoy herself. She didn’t need Lance.
It was a long day for her. When she got home Arthur was already sat on the sofa watching some sort of documentary when she got in. She abandoned her guitar by the door and flopped on the other end of the sofa, stretching out and resting her feet on his lap. Unconsciously he rested his arm over her legs, “How was today?”
“Today was good. We really got somewhere.”
“Good, I’m glad.”
“Arthur,” she started hesitantly, “About the other day…”
“What about it?”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have,” she pulled her feet from his lap and sat cross legged. She leant towards him, “But thank you.”
“That’s okay,” he reached out and rub his hand over her bare forearm. She looked down at his hand and smiled meekly. Her gaze trailed back up to his eyes. The intensity of his gaze was enough to make even the bitterest of people melt. She gulped and subconsciously ran her tongue over her lips.
She pushed forwards and caught him off guard. Not enough that he didn’t respond as she kissed him, though.
X
The next morning Arthur had the earlier start, he got up from bed feeling more cheerful than he had for a long while. He climbed in the shower and ridded himself of the grime from the day before. It was hot, and soothing on his tense muscles.
He made his way back to his room in his towel.
He leant across his bed with a smile on his face. He pressed a short kiss to the bare shoulder of the figure lying in his bed. He gently nudged her shoulder with the tip of his nose and kissed her again. She didn’t wake.
He dressed himself quickly in a pair of smart jeans, shirt and suit jacket. She was still asleep when he needed to leave, and he didn’t have the heart to wake her. He pulled the top post-it off the pile and scribbled a note on it;
Gwen,
Had to go to work,
I’ll see you tonight.
X
X
Confusion struck the young singer when she woke. There was no pink, no purple and no patterns on the duvet she was lying beneath. She was suddenly very aware that this was still her apartment; it just wasn’t her room.
She swallowed. She slowly lifted the cover and chewed on her lower lip as she swore loudly to herself. She looked to the other side of the bed, knowing it was empty from the lack of warmth beside her. She noticed the neon yellow paper on the pillow next to her.
She read it over and over and bit down harder on her lip; no, he wouldn’t.
x
After a long day chasing various projects, Arthur was looking forward to a nice glass of wine and relaxing on the sofa with Gwen.
He hadn't expected to return to an empty flat with a lot of disappeared belongings, "Gwen?" he called out.
There was no answer.
He somehow knew that if he walked into her room now she wouldn't be there. He pushed open the door and found it, as he had thought, bare.
He noticed a piece of paper folded on her bed. He snatched it up and opened it; it was covered in her songwriter scrawl.
Arthur,
I'm sorry to leave like this but we both know it wouldn't be a good idea for me to stay here. The other night wasn't a mistake. I would be lying if I told you it was. I can't tell you how much what you have done for me means to me. There aren't enough words.
You have to understand why I’m doing this. I don’t want to hurt you. That’s the last thing I want to do. Part of me feels like none of this is real. That my failed relationship pushed me towards you. I know that that isn’t the case but I respect you too much to make you the rebound guy. You mean more to me than that, in whatever capacity I see you in, I know I don’t want to hurt you. I’m sorry.
Thank you for giving me the room; it was appreciated. You’ve given me so much and I know that I’ll never be able to repay you for what you’ve done. Thank you.
Don’t be angry with Gwaine and Leon. They’re just helping me out.
Gwen
Arthur had his phone out of his pocket before he’d finished her note. He tried her number first but it went straight to voicemail like he thought it would. He tried Gwaine next. He picked up after the fifth ring, “She’s not here.”
“Where is she?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“Gwaine, for fuck’s sake we’re not twelve. Where is she?”
“She’s staying with Leon.”
“Thank you.”
“I didn’t tell you.”
“I think she’ll know.”
X
He stood leaning against her door, a hand on either side. He'd been knocking for ten minutes. He knew she was there. He could hear her moving around and Leon had told him she was there when he’d phoned him, "Gwen! Open up! I'm not leaving until you talk to me. Gwen! Come on!"
The door opened before him, revealing her, "What do you want?"
"I want you to come back."
"No," she said, instantly shutting the door in his face. He blocked it from closing completely with his elbow, "Just go away, Arthur."
"I'm not leaving without you."
"Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"Because from the moment you moved in a void has been filled. From the moment you moved in I've been happy. The flat is empty without you,” he moved to cup her jaw but she moved away from him.
"We can't live together, Arthur, we can't."
"Why not?"
"Because it's not a good idea," she moved to shut the door but he stepped through, not letting her shut him out of her life. He grabbed her hand and pulled her around, "Arthur-" he pressed his lips to hers firmly, quietening her. He ran his tongue across her lip only to be rewarded with the touch of her own. It was brash and clashing, bruising and swelling their lips. Arthur gently nipped her lip as it came to a lingering end, "I can't," she whispered resting her forehead against his chin.
He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, "yes, you can."
"Not whilst I'm recording. It wouldn't be right."
"Morgana's your manager."
"And you're hers."
"There's no rules. And nobody needs to know. The press know we live together. They don't need to know what goes on behind closed doors."
"What if we slip up?"
"We'll deal with that as we come to it," he said softly, hooking a rogue curl behind her ear, "Gwen," he started, "Guinevere, I miss you.”
“I’ve not been gone five minutes.”
“We don't have to do anything. Just come back."
"I shouldn't."
"But will you?"
"I don't have a choice," he cracked a smile at her. Slowly he tucked her hair behind her ears, seeking her permission as he closed the small gap between them. She leant to him, eyes closed.
"Good job you're still packed."
X
The crowd cheered. The lights dimmed and she made her way off stage. Gwen beamed. Her first headline performance and people were cheering. She handed her acoustic to the stage hand with a grin. In the darkness backstage she was pulled into a corner.
"I could have you done for harassment," she said against his kiss.
"You could, but you won't."
"No."
"You did a good job tonight."
"One more song to go," she said with a nervous smile, "I think you'll like it," she checked over her shoulder and caught Gwaine's eye, "Ready?"
"Whenever you're done," he replied with a suggestive smile.
Arthur dropped his grip from her waist. She pulled on his open shirt and placed one final kiss to his lips, "Knock them dead," he encouraged and guided her back towards the stage.
The crowd broke out into another round of woops and cheers. He watched her click her microphone out of the stand; "How you doing, alright?" she asked. The awkwardness she used to feel was gone, "Thank you so much for your support tonight. In return, I'd like to welcome three friends of mine to the stage!"
Gwaine, Leon and Percy walked on stage, greeted by a more feminine scream. Arthur laughed and caught Gwen's eye, "Have fun."
He first saw her on a Tuesday.
She was standing outside Waterstones with a guitar case at her feet. In it were a couple of home-made CDs and a scattering of coins that amounted to nothing more than a tenner. She had a pair of purple Doc Martens on her feet and daisies in her hair. She smiled as she sang and there was something about her that caught him.
He first spoke to her on a Thursday.
She was standing outside Waterstones with a guitar case at her feet. This time she had more money in it. As she sang a song she had written herself he smiled at her; “Nice voice.” She’d smiled at him and carried on singing as he walked away. She didn’t stop herself from watching him go.
He first fell in love with her on a Monday.
He doesn’t know exactly when he did, but he know he first realised it when she was unattainable to him but now, further down the line, his waiting paid off for him. He had the girl now. The girl he’d waited for.
Authors: mydoctortennant
Pairings/Characters: Arthur/Gwen, Gwen/Lance (o.O), Merlin, Morgana and introducing music sensation Caerleon (Members: Leon on Guitar, Gwaine on Bass and Percy on drums)
Warnings: Illusions of a sexual nature and language.
Disclaimer: Not real. Despite birthday wishes and night time prayers to Santa (all Hail Amy Pond!) Merlin still isn't mine!
Rating: MA15
Summary: Sometimes help comes from the most unexpected of places, even when you don't want it.
Author Notes: Written for ella_rose88 and beta'd by sgmajorshipper. Yes, Caerleon are inspired by my boys (for those that don't follow my obsessions that would be McFly) and I'm not ashamed to admit it XD
My Merlin Prompt Table 2010 :: 2011
Part One
A month later and Arthur was at behind his desk at the label offices. The studio was in the basement with his office above it on the ground floor; all of it soundproofed so he couldn’t hear anything. He leant back in his seat on two legs of his chair and put his feet on his desk. He was reading through a new proposal Morgana had presented him with that morning.
She was busy downstairs, working with Gwen of all people.
Over the last few weeks he had slowly worn her down; he kept going until she gave in just so he would shut up and stop giving her a nightly headache.
Morgana had come to the conclusion over the last couple of days that Gwen was good, but she did need a few other members to make up the rest of her ‘band’. They wanted her to adopt a set line-up. That way they could bond. They could write together, perform together. They’d have to get along well to travel so closely. It would have to be well planned. They already had a list of potentials they could use.
That was what they were working on now. Together they were talking to the ‘maybes’ whittling out those who Gwen instantly clicked with and those who she didn’t.
Arthur’s phone rang on his desk, making him jump out of his skin. He nearly fell backwards out of his chair, he flailed and grabbed out for the wooden top. He grabbed out for the phone quickly, his heart pounding in his chest, “Arthur,” he answered.
”We’re done.” Morgana announced and hung up.
Arthur abandoned his papers on his desk and left. He had people to hire and contracts to send out, but he needed to meet with Morgana first. Then Merlin.
Merlin needed in on this too.
X
There was something about having a roommate that made Arthur neater; after Gwen had moved in, his room had suddenly become immaculate. He washed up, he piled magazines, he put his books back on the shelves and didn’t leave towels in the middle of the bathroom floor.
He’d even started eating properly. He couldn’t look like he lived on Chinese take-out every night now, he had a substantial meal that he occasionally cooked for himself; much like now.
“How is everything going?” Arthur asked; he knew perfectly well that they had started laying tracks down left, right and centre. She got along well with her new musicians and everything seemed to be going well; or so Morgana said, but Arthur had learnt over the years to take what she said with a pinch of salt.
“So far so good. They’ve picked up the songs, made them better with their suggestions. We’ve got a good few tracks recorded now, so hopefully it’ll work. Merlin’s been giving us new ideas all over the place, which has been amazing.”
“So I was right, you should be with us.”
Gwen looked at him with a raised eyebrow but a smile soon broke out on her face, “If that’s what you want to hear, Arthur, yes, you were right.”
He smiled down at her. Slowly it disappeared, but he was still looking at her, studying her face as she too looked at him. The silence became awkward and Arthur cleared his throat. Gwen looked away down to the pots and pans he had on the hob bubbling away.
“What are we having?”
“Wondrous delight called ‘spagbol’ but we were out of ‘spag’ so it’s more of a ‘pasbol’.”
Gwen laughed, “I’m sure it’ll be just as good.”
“It will be better.”
X
Swivel chairs were invented by the gods for days like this. The type of day that moved so slowly, giving you all the time in the world when you just couldn’t get anything done. A lanky man in his twenties was sat in one, now spinning around aimlessly. Gwen was off on her lunch and Morgana was in a meeting with Arthur.
Merlin should have been doing his work. He should have been mixing tracks like he had been all morning, but it had gotten to the point now where he was fed up of hearing the same verse, over and over.
Freya was sat in the studio still. She was plucking away at her bass strings, practising for the song she was meant to record in the afternoon. She was quiet, ridiculously so, but talented. Merlin wasn’t sure how she was fair when it came to touring, but for now she was a perfect arrangement. She added a lot to a song by simply playing around with the conventions of a bass line.
She looked up from her bass and caught Merlin’s eye from where he had stopped spinning and was watching her play. She smiled at him meekly, a pink dusting over her cheek creeping over her ears as well. He offered her a thumbs-up and she laughed and mouthed a thank you.
X
The second time Arthur stood in an audience watching Gwen perform it was in a much better venue. She’d recorded part of her album now and was testing the songs out on an audience that was interested in her and some that weren’t. They were the ones they aimed to impress; if they left the venue speaking her name they knew they’d done it.
So far so good. The crowd had been receptive to the three songs she had played already and all eyes were on the stage waiting for more.
Gwen looked across to Arthur who was sat by the bar. He nodded at her and raised his glass. She grinned and plucked at her guitar strings to begin her fourth song.
X
At the bar at the end of the show, before Gwen could reach Arthur to get the low-down she was intercepted by another man. He was of a similar height to Arthur but was in every way different. His hair was dark, black in the lack of light in the club. He was unshaven and darker skinned.
“You were amazing tonight,” he greeted with a polite smile.
“Thank you,” she didn’t try to push past him. His eyes were kind, his body language wasn’t imposing and he seemed like a nice guy.
“Lance,” he introduced and held out his hand, she took it and shook it firmly.
“Gwen,” she said out of common courtesy. It was still a foreign concept to her that anybody might know her name.
“It’s nice to meet you.”
“You too.”
From his seat beside the bar Arthur watched the exchange as the DJ started his set in the background, the thumping music grating through his mind. He’d never liked clubs over pubs for that precise reason. Still, it didn’t seem to bother Gwen as she accepted a dance from the dark and moderately handsome stranger who had approached her.
Arthur clenched his jaw. He downed the rest of his drink and slammed his glass down on the bar, “’Nother?” the barman enquired. Arthur declined with a shake of his head. He threw down a twenty pound note and left
He didn’t need to watch this hurrah and he had a bottle of wine at home in the fridge.
X
Despite the threat of a heavy hang over, Arthur forced himself out of bed at the usual time. He had a meeting with Morgana about a potential new solo artist that she wanted to sign to the label. Apparently it was some young kid who had ‘one hell of a voice’. It was typical Morgana. Anything she could market as a poster boy and she would do it. Half the time she was right though, so he would see it through.
He walked into the kitchen only wearing a pair of grey jogging bottoms. He stopped in his tracks when he realised he wasn’t alone. Before him stood a black haired, olive skinned man with a spattering of designer fuzz on his chin, “Who the hell are you?” Arthur asked reaching for a spare t-shirt that he had abandoned on the back of the sofa.
“I could ask you the same thing,” the bloke answered calmly. Arthur already wanted to punch him. The urge to do so heightened when he noticed that he was only wearing his boxers and last night’s too-tight t-shirt.
“This is my flat,” Arthur stated, and crossed his arms across his cheat and glared at him.
An acute fear filled the stranger’s eyes and he looked Arthur up and down, “You’re Gwen’s boyfriend?” he asked with a minor lack in confidence. He wouldn’t deny that the blonde did look like he could knock him for six should he say the wrong thing.
“What? No. We live together,” he answered as if it were the most normal thing in all the world.
“Oookay, I’m going to go now,” the stranger said with his cup of coffee in his hands and slinked back towards Gwen’s bedroom. Arthur’s jaw clenched. He poured himself a cup of he bitter liquid and downed it as quickly as he could.
Gwen’s bedroom door opened again and closed equally as quickly with Gwen appearing in front of him. It looked as though she had dressed for his benefit.
Arthur regarded her with wide eyes and took a long gulp from his new cup of coffee, “What the hell was that?” he confronted. He was all for her having a life but he didn’t particularly want to walk in on her sex partner the next morning.
“What?” Gwen said, she looked a cross between taken-aback and offended. She stopped in her path to the kettle to make herself a cup of tea, “I’m not allowed a sex life?” she asked. She was a musician, weren’t they all meant to be love, sex and rock ‘n’ roll? It wasn’t like she slept around. Besides, Lance was the first person she had ever brought back to the flat.
“Not with that guy.”
“What’s wrong with Lance?”
Arthur really didn’t know, there was just a vibe that he got radiating from the bloke that he didn’t like, “There’s something creepy about him that I don’t trust.”
“You spoke to him for a minute,” she said with a frown, “what would you know?”
“Did you speak to him much longer?”
“Oh fuck off, Arthur, like you’re any better.”
“At least I don’t pretend that it means anything.”
“I’m not pretending anything.”
“No? Then why are you acting defensive?” he crossed his arms over his chest and stood as tall as he could.
“I’m not.”
“Yeah, you are.”
“Look, I’m gunna go,” the roommates turned around to look in the direction of the voice. Gwen attempted a smile at him but it never reached her eyes, “I don’t want to get in the way.”
“You’re not,” Gwen said trying to sound convincing.
“I’m getting in the way of something,” he said and promptly left.
There was a pregnant silence between the pair of them. Gwen glared at him, “Thanks for that.”
“I’m sure you’ll have many happy times together,” Arthur replied sarcastically and walked towards his room.
Gwen grabbed one of the cushions from the sofa and launched it in his direction. It hit his closed bedroom door. She growled and kicked the back of the sofa with her bare foot, “Owh,” she pouted and rubbed her toes, “Wanker.”
X
The weeks passed quickly. The tension in the Pendragon flat didn’t pass easily.
The silences that had once become comfortable were once again filled to the brim with anger and hatred that made the habitat an impossible place to stay for a prolonged period of time.
After the success of her show gave Gwen a boost in her previously lagging confidence, she found herself more inspired than ever to write. At this rate she would have an all too long list of songs that she could use on the album.
Arthur stayed up in his office more.
Morgana and Merlin had started to relay the information between them if they needed to communicate at all. All Arthur needed to know was it was going well. Apart from that, the welfare of his acts was nothing to do with him.
Gwen had taken to staying in her room once she’d gotten home. She spent so much time at the studio that Arthur had started to beat her home nearly everyday.
If they ever crossed paths she would offer him a cup of tea or coffee or make painful small talk. It was getting to the point of ridiculousness.
If the papers cared enough they would have reported the fear of a lover’s tiff by now, not that they were anywhere near correct.
The singer found it easier to throw herself into her work than face the problems they were going through. She bonded with her new band mates from Will the drummer to Freya; whom Merlin seemingly bonded with quite nicely too. They were both completely loveable people, both of whom Gwen still needed to know better, but she always had time for them should they need her.
X
Gwen removed her headphones and hung them over the microphone stand. The door unclicked and was pushed open by a familiar face, “Hey,” she greeted as she found herself pulled into a warm embrace and kissed lightly on the lips. She grinned up at him; he had started coming to see her every day on his lunch break.
Gwaine teased her that it was getting serious now that that had started to happen but she just ignored him. She’d only known Lance for a couple of weeks. She didn’t know all that much about him yet.
From the production counter two figures remained stationery watching them; “You shouldn’t live with her any more. It’s not good for you.” Morgana stated. She made sure that the microphone into the studio was muted. Gwen shouldn’t hear what she was about to say from her over Arthur.
“You think I don’t know that?” he said inching the bridge of his nose between his finger and thumb and shook his head, “What do I do, Morgana?”
“Tell her the truth or kick her out. Maybe both, if neither of those gets the pair of you laid with each other.”
“He shouldn’t be here. He’s not good forher writing process.”
“Doesn’t help that you’re jealous of him.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Just fucking tell her you love her, Arthur. Is it really that hard?” Merlin inputted as he entered with a foot long sandwich from the sandwich shop and a cookie in a paper bag that he threw in Morgana’s direction.
“You told him?”
“As if,” Merlin laughed taking his seat next to the manager, “It was easy to see.”
“So you leapt to a conclusion?”
“Noooo… he took a tiny step and there conclusions were,” she said as she slid the cookie out of the paper packaging and took a large bite.
“Fuck the pair of you.”
“Ewh, no. Bad mental image,” Morgana complained screwing her eyes shut against the thought.
X
It wasn’t something that Arthur had ever done before, waited in the dark like a bit of a creep for a woman to come to him. It all seemed a little wrong, but this couldn’t wait any longer.
She was spending day after day late in the studio recording, getting the work done so the album could be released on time; a rare occurrence for nearly all bands. The more time she spent there, the more time Lance spent their and the more time Arthur spent in his office away from them. He didn’t want to see it.
He should have told Gwen something about inappropriate behaviour but knowing she would only call him on it anyway. Question him within an inch of his mental capability then take the final inch when she left him hanging once again.
Arthur heard the jangle of her keys and the scratch of metal against metal as she missed the lock the first time before she turned the lock to free the door, “I’m home!” she announced. She didn’t log that Arthur was sat in the main room as she walked in.
“I can see that,” he said with a tug of a smile.”
“Christ, Arthur, you scared me!” she exclaimed placing her hand against her chest as she heaved a breath.
“Sorry.”
“What you sitting in the dark for?” she asked flicking the light switch on, “Practising being a creeper?”
“It got dark whilst I was sat here and I couldn’t be bothered to move.”
“It got dark three hours ago.”
“Really?” she nodded, “Oh.”
“What’s on your mind?” he shook his head, “Oh come on, Arthur. I know you, you wouldn’t just sit there for three hours and not move if you weren’t thinking about something.”
“You,” he said nearly cutting her off.
“Me.”
“How I-“
“Arthur-“
“-feel about you-“
“-please.”
“I love you,” he said looking straight at her.
Her jaw dropped, she failed to speak for a second, her mouth moving like a guppy. She closed her eyes and shook away his ridiculous words, “I’m with Lance.”
“I’ll wait for you, as long as it takes.”
“This isn’t some whim; I’m in this for keeps.”
“He doesn’t love you.”
“Maybe not. But I didn’t say I loved him either.”
“In it for keeps without love? What’s the point?” he gesticulated wildly, waving his arms around in the air beside his head.
“I’m not just going to sleep with him and move on, Arthur. I’m not like that.”
“He is.”
“You don’t know him.”
“I know his type.”
“And I know yours. I know you. You don’t love me.”
“You obviously don’t know me that well then, do you?” he left her with her thoughts, shutting himself in his bedroom without turning on his light. He moved across the room, not ridding himself of any clothing before he collapsed on top of his duvet, head buried in his pillows as he willed his body to sleep.
X
Gwen closed down her studio, putting away her guitars and locking them in the cupboard so she wouldn’t have to carry them back and forth to the flat overnight. She didn’t want to ask Arthur to help after the week before. They had been deathly silent in the flat for most of the weekend. As far as she was aware she was the last one there, apart from the security guard who would eventually lock her out.
She departed down the corridor towards the side entrance of the building, passing one of the other studios. The door was ajar, which was bizarre, usually they were all locked once left unattended and there was no stream of light coming from inside. Gwen heard the crash of a symbol colliding with the floor violently drift from the studio.
She jumped; “Hello?”
She edged towards the open door. She pushed on the wood allowing it so slowly drift open.
The sight before her wasn’t one she had imagined.
Words escaped her, “Gwen-“
“No,” she shook her head and exhaled through her mouth, “He told me not to trust you,” she declared turning away from the sight displayed to her and briskly walking down te corridor.
“Gwen!” a firm hand grabbed her arm and tugged her around, “Gwen, I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? You were fucking my band mate in our fucking studio and you’re sorry!?” she shouted yanking her arm from his grasp, “I should have listened to Arthur about you,” she said tears brimming in her eyes.
“What did he tell you, huh? How much of a wanker I must be for showing an interest in you? You know he only says that bull because he wants you for himself.”
“At least he wants me!” she argued back pushing back oh his chest to distance him from her and ran out of the studio door and out onto the street where her taxi was waiting to take her home.
X
The front door slammed shut, vibrating through the entire wall and alerting Arthur to her presence. The secondary slamming of her bedroom door was what pushed him into action. He pushed out from his home studio and headed straight towards his door.
He edged up to Gwen’s door and listened. He could hear the occasional sob and her breaths hitching in her throat; “Guinevere?” she didn’t answer, “Gwen?”
“Leave me alone, Arthur.”
“What’s wrong?” he called through the door.
“Nothing.”
“Guinevere, I’m coming in, okay?” she didn’t deny him so he turned the handle, opening the door. She was sat on the edge of her bed with her back to him. He’d never had much experience with crying girls. The only woman he had contact with, apart from Gwen, was Morgana and he’d only see her cry once when they were younger. He’d been the cause of her tears, so he’d never had to deal with them.
He sat down beside her, “What happened?”
“Doesn’t matter,” she said, wiping the tears from her cheeks.
“If its making you cry, then obviously it does,” Arthur wrapped his arm around her shoulder, bringing her into his chest. She sniffed, fisted her hand in his shirt.
“I trusted him. You told me not to, but I ignored you,” she said through her tears, her nose starting to run. She wiped at it with the back of her hand, “I should have listened to you; God, to everybody. Even Gwaine told me to leave him; told me he was bad news.”
He gently rocked her back and forth, running his hand over her hair trying to be soothing. She cried into is chest for a good five minutes before her sobs started to subside.
“I’ve given you patches on your shirt,” she said through her tears, she rubbed the wet patch and straightened his collar. She was very aware of his lack of tie and undone buttons. She caught his bare skin with the end of her fingers. She sniffed and wiped the tear tracks away again. She flattened her hand over the material she’s crumpled in her fist moments before.
She looked him in the eye for the first time since he’d come into her room. She hadn’t realised how close he was. How easy it would be to-
She cupped his jaw and within the next moment she kissed him once; a light peck on his bottom lip. He didn’t get a chance to respond before she kissed him once again, this time a little more harshly. Arthur would be lying if he had said he didn’t want this; he more than wanted it, but he didn’t want it like this.
He leant away from her, and took her hand away from his cheek, “You don’t want this.”
“You don’t know what I want,” she replied sharply.
“Then I don’t want it,” he said standing up and moving away from her, “Not like this,” he left abruptly and shut her door behind him. He kept a hold of the door handle and leant against the wood. He resisted the urge to swear loudly and crossed the corridor into his room.
He shut his door and leant against it and sighed. He pinched the bridge of his nose. He didn’t want it to happen like this. Not when she’d been using his shirt as a tissue. He just needed to give her time.
X
A persistent knocking on her bedroom door roused her from her personal recording session. She unplugged her headphones from the keyboard and headed to the door, wrapping the cord around her wrist as she walked.
She unlocked her door and pulled it open. She clapped eyes on her intruder and she stepped aside to let her in; “I didn’t think you’d answer,” Gwen shrugged, “Arthur’s worried about you.”
“That’s nice of him.”
“Gwen, you’ve not come out for days. You should be down in the studio but you’re here, cooped up in your room like a hermit. You’re not eating.”
“Morgana, I’m not in the mood for this,” she said sitting back in her seat. She swivelled around back to facing Morgana. She unwound the cable from her wrist and started to play with it. It was taking all her willpower not to cut off Morgana’s words by plugging her headphones back in and going back to work.
“Well get in the mood for it. You have an album to record and a deadline to keep to.”
“Then I give up. I don’t need it.”
“Gwen, for god’s sake; grow up. It’s not the first time people have gone through this.”
“Are you done?” Gwen looked up from her seat, she caught Morgana’s icy glare, “I was in the middle of something.”
“Singing angry break-up written songs, yeah, I heard. That’s not you, Gwen. You don’t sing about that crap. That’s why you’ve been successful. You’re not like everybody else.”
“Yet like everybody else I get hurt, can you please just leave me alone? Maybe I just need to vent.”
“He’s not worth this.”
“I get it, Morgana, I do. Your brother made it perfectly clear. I just need to be left alone.”
“You’ve got until Monday. Then I want you back in that studio or I will drag you there myself,” she warned seriously. She took off out of Gwen’s door. It was another ten seconds before Gwen heard the front door slam and she was alone again.
x
Monday came around quickly. Gwen rose miraculously happy that morning. She stretched and for the first time since she’d caught Lance with another woman she smiled. She grabbed her guitar from the corner of the room and left as quickly as she could, still in her pyjamas. Nobody at the studio dared to judge. If he was more comfortable in her pyjamas they let her be.
She spent her day recording, happily redoing songs she wanted to try in new ways. Her mind was set on the job, she could do this and she could enjoy herself. She didn’t need Lance.
It was a long day for her. When she got home Arthur was already sat on the sofa watching some sort of documentary when she got in. She abandoned her guitar by the door and flopped on the other end of the sofa, stretching out and resting her feet on his lap. Unconsciously he rested his arm over her legs, “How was today?”
“Today was good. We really got somewhere.”
“Good, I’m glad.”
“Arthur,” she started hesitantly, “About the other day…”
“What about it?”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have,” she pulled her feet from his lap and sat cross legged. She leant towards him, “But thank you.”
“That’s okay,” he reached out and rub his hand over her bare forearm. She looked down at his hand and smiled meekly. Her gaze trailed back up to his eyes. The intensity of his gaze was enough to make even the bitterest of people melt. She gulped and subconsciously ran her tongue over her lips.
She pushed forwards and caught him off guard. Not enough that he didn’t respond as she kissed him, though.
X
The next morning Arthur had the earlier start, he got up from bed feeling more cheerful than he had for a long while. He climbed in the shower and ridded himself of the grime from the day before. It was hot, and soothing on his tense muscles.
He made his way back to his room in his towel.
He leant across his bed with a smile on his face. He pressed a short kiss to the bare shoulder of the figure lying in his bed. He gently nudged her shoulder with the tip of his nose and kissed her again. She didn’t wake.
He dressed himself quickly in a pair of smart jeans, shirt and suit jacket. She was still asleep when he needed to leave, and he didn’t have the heart to wake her. He pulled the top post-it off the pile and scribbled a note on it;
Gwen,
Had to go to work,
I’ll see you tonight.
X
X
Confusion struck the young singer when she woke. There was no pink, no purple and no patterns on the duvet she was lying beneath. She was suddenly very aware that this was still her apartment; it just wasn’t her room.
She swallowed. She slowly lifted the cover and chewed on her lower lip as she swore loudly to herself. She looked to the other side of the bed, knowing it was empty from the lack of warmth beside her. She noticed the neon yellow paper on the pillow next to her.
She read it over and over and bit down harder on her lip; no, he wouldn’t.
x
After a long day chasing various projects, Arthur was looking forward to a nice glass of wine and relaxing on the sofa with Gwen.
He hadn't expected to return to an empty flat with a lot of disappeared belongings, "Gwen?" he called out.
There was no answer.
He somehow knew that if he walked into her room now she wouldn't be there. He pushed open the door and found it, as he had thought, bare.
He noticed a piece of paper folded on her bed. He snatched it up and opened it; it was covered in her songwriter scrawl.
Arthur,
I'm sorry to leave like this but we both know it wouldn't be a good idea for me to stay here. The other night wasn't a mistake. I would be lying if I told you it was. I can't tell you how much what you have done for me means to me. There aren't enough words.
You have to understand why I’m doing this. I don’t want to hurt you. That’s the last thing I want to do. Part of me feels like none of this is real. That my failed relationship pushed me towards you. I know that that isn’t the case but I respect you too much to make you the rebound guy. You mean more to me than that, in whatever capacity I see you in, I know I don’t want to hurt you. I’m sorry.
Thank you for giving me the room; it was appreciated. You’ve given me so much and I know that I’ll never be able to repay you for what you’ve done. Thank you.
Don’t be angry with Gwaine and Leon. They’re just helping me out.
Gwen
Arthur had his phone out of his pocket before he’d finished her note. He tried her number first but it went straight to voicemail like he thought it would. He tried Gwaine next. He picked up after the fifth ring, “She’s not here.”
“Where is she?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“Gwaine, for fuck’s sake we’re not twelve. Where is she?”
“She’s staying with Leon.”
“Thank you.”
“I didn’t tell you.”
“I think she’ll know.”
X
He stood leaning against her door, a hand on either side. He'd been knocking for ten minutes. He knew she was there. He could hear her moving around and Leon had told him she was there when he’d phoned him, "Gwen! Open up! I'm not leaving until you talk to me. Gwen! Come on!"
The door opened before him, revealing her, "What do you want?"
"I want you to come back."
"No," she said, instantly shutting the door in his face. He blocked it from closing completely with his elbow, "Just go away, Arthur."
"I'm not leaving without you."
"Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"Because from the moment you moved in a void has been filled. From the moment you moved in I've been happy. The flat is empty without you,” he moved to cup her jaw but she moved away from him.
"We can't live together, Arthur, we can't."
"Why not?"
"Because it's not a good idea," she moved to shut the door but he stepped through, not letting her shut him out of her life. He grabbed her hand and pulled her around, "Arthur-" he pressed his lips to hers firmly, quietening her. He ran his tongue across her lip only to be rewarded with the touch of her own. It was brash and clashing, bruising and swelling their lips. Arthur gently nipped her lip as it came to a lingering end, "I can't," she whispered resting her forehead against his chin.
He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, "yes, you can."
"Not whilst I'm recording. It wouldn't be right."
"Morgana's your manager."
"And you're hers."
"There's no rules. And nobody needs to know. The press know we live together. They don't need to know what goes on behind closed doors."
"What if we slip up?"
"We'll deal with that as we come to it," he said softly, hooking a rogue curl behind her ear, "Gwen," he started, "Guinevere, I miss you.”
“I’ve not been gone five minutes.”
“We don't have to do anything. Just come back."
"I shouldn't."
"But will you?"
"I don't have a choice," he cracked a smile at her. Slowly he tucked her hair behind her ears, seeking her permission as he closed the small gap between them. She leant to him, eyes closed.
"Good job you're still packed."
X
The crowd cheered. The lights dimmed and she made her way off stage. Gwen beamed. Her first headline performance and people were cheering. She handed her acoustic to the stage hand with a grin. In the darkness backstage she was pulled into a corner.
"I could have you done for harassment," she said against his kiss.
"You could, but you won't."
"No."
"You did a good job tonight."
"One more song to go," she said with a nervous smile, "I think you'll like it," she checked over her shoulder and caught Gwaine's eye, "Ready?"
"Whenever you're done," he replied with a suggestive smile.
Arthur dropped his grip from her waist. She pulled on his open shirt and placed one final kiss to his lips, "Knock them dead," he encouraged and guided her back towards the stage.
The crowd broke out into another round of woops and cheers. He watched her click her microphone out of the stand; "How you doing, alright?" she asked. The awkwardness she used to feel was gone, "Thank you so much for your support tonight. In return, I'd like to welcome three friends of mine to the stage!"
Gwaine, Leon and Percy walked on stage, greeted by a more feminine scream. Arthur laughed and caught Gwen's eye, "Have fun."
He first saw her on a Tuesday.
She was standing outside Waterstones with a guitar case at her feet. In it were a couple of home-made CDs and a scattering of coins that amounted to nothing more than a tenner. She had a pair of purple Doc Martens on her feet and daisies in her hair. She smiled as she sang and there was something about her that caught him.
He first spoke to her on a Thursday.
She was standing outside Waterstones with a guitar case at her feet. This time she had more money in it. As she sang a song she had written herself he smiled at her; “Nice voice.” She’d smiled at him and carried on singing as he walked away. She didn’t stop herself from watching him go.
He first fell in love with her on a Monday.
He doesn’t know exactly when he did, but he know he first realised it when she was unattainable to him but now, further down the line, his waiting paid off for him. He had the girl now. The girl he’d waited for.