Hate eye infection.
Background: I have a horrfic eye stye/tear duct infection/creature sprouting out of my eye. It is huge and looks like someone punched me in the face and I think it may actually have its own pulse. Everyone who sees it thinks I am abused (ex: my boss took one look at it and said "Who are you dating?" in all seriousness). Therefore, I have taken to wearing sunglasses at all hours of the day. Partially, to keep people from asking questions, but mostly because I am very, very vain.
A little while ago, while I was trying to convince alien-spawn to depart, and depart for good (by using a hot compress, of course), Emma decided to make up lyrics about my current deformation, sung to the tune of Spice Girls songs. Emma, if you read this, I encourage you to post the songs you wrote. They all involve words like "infection" and "eye puss".
Anyway, while I was in the shower, I made up my own. It is to be sung to the chorus of "Stop":
Stop right now
You hurt so very much
I need some relief like a pin point touch
Hey you, always on my eye
Gotta go away baby I don't want no stye.
A-thank you.
And no, I'm not drunk. But I would like to be. Ingrid, go buy me beer.
A little while ago, while I was trying to convince alien-spawn to depart, and depart for good (by using a hot compress, of course), Emma decided to make up lyrics about my current deformation, sung to the tune of Spice Girls songs. Emma, if you read this, I encourage you to post the songs you wrote. They all involve words like "infection" and "eye puss".
Anyway, while I was in the shower, I made up my own. It is to be sung to the chorus of "Stop":
Stop right now
You hurt so very much
I need some relief like a pin point touch
Hey you, always on my eye
Gotta go away baby I don't want no stye.
A-thank you.
And no, I'm not drunk. But I would like to be. Ingrid, go buy me beer.