There It Was
There It Was
He knew it wasn’t possible, but sometimes…
He shook his head. The last thing Jared needed to do was think things like that. The last thing he needs, he thinks, is to be working someplace like this. There was a time when he thought working in the private sector would be a good idea, when the stress of his job got too much and he wanted to get away.
When he watched the other man walk into the room though, he realized he’d just traded one set of stressful situations for another. He didn’t believe what they were doing was illegal, but definitely amoral and there were times when he wanted to shrug off the hefty pay check and great benefits and forget the rest. Of course that was when he remembered his mom’s hospital bills and he shut his mouth.
Romeo had come back from the engagement still dressed to the nines, only the line of his custom tailored pants showing that he wasn’t as freshly pressed as he had been when he left.
When treatment was over, Jared was waiting for him. Romeo smiled at him and Jared forced himself to hold back his own smile, giving just the smallest back so that others wouldn’t wonder what was in his head.
“I would like to swim now.” Romeo said as they walked together.
Jared just nodded. “You do seem to enjoy swimming.” He ignored the memories in his head. He ignored the thought of skin under his fingers and chlorine in his nostrils as they clung together.
“Do you want to swim with me?” Romeo asked politely like he did every time Jared followed him down there.
He took a deep breath. He remembered the special arrangement he had with DeWitt, remembered how many days he’d been in and how many more they had left. Remembered the days when Romeo had a name and how they’d lost everything when a serial killer had followed Jared home, trying to take down the detective that was too close to him. He tried not to remember walking in with his lover to find their son dean and his mother a bloody mess, barely alive and still, years later, not recovered. He remembered losing him then and the offer that he would never have to remember.
Jensen didn’t remember, but Jared did. It only took a look though, and the memories feel back. Jensen was gone for another 392 days. Jared would watch his back, would ‘handle’ him as he had promised DeWitt, but when it was over Jared would be forced with it all alone. He loved Jensen and knew it was the only chance to save him, but he wasn’t so sure anymore there would be a way to save them when it was done.
Sometimes though… sometimes Romeo looked at him, and it looked like Jensen. It wasn’t possible, but there it was.
He knew it wasn’t possible, but sometimes…
He shook his head. The last thing Jared needed to do was think things like that. The last thing he needs, he thinks, is to be working someplace like this. There was a time when he thought working in the private sector would be a good idea, when the stress of his job got too much and he wanted to get away.
When he watched the other man walk into the room though, he realized he’d just traded one set of stressful situations for another. He didn’t believe what they were doing was illegal, but definitely amoral and there were times when he wanted to shrug off the hefty pay check and great benefits and forget the rest. Of course that was when he remembered his mom’s hospital bills and he shut his mouth.
Romeo had come back from the engagement still dressed to the nines, only the line of his custom tailored pants showing that he wasn’t as freshly pressed as he had been when he left.
When treatment was over, Jared was waiting for him. Romeo smiled at him and Jared forced himself to hold back his own smile, giving just the smallest back so that others wouldn’t wonder what was in his head.
“I would like to swim now.” Romeo said as they walked together.
Jared just nodded. “You do seem to enjoy swimming.” He ignored the memories in his head. He ignored the thought of skin under his fingers and chlorine in his nostrils as they clung together.
“Do you want to swim with me?” Romeo asked politely like he did every time Jared followed him down there.
He took a deep breath. He remembered the special arrangement he had with DeWitt, remembered how many days he’d been in and how many more they had left. Remembered the days when Romeo had a name and how they’d lost everything when a serial killer had followed Jared home, trying to take down the detective that was too close to him. He tried not to remember walking in with his lover to find their son dean and his mother a bloody mess, barely alive and still, years later, not recovered. He remembered losing him then and the offer that he would never have to remember.
Jensen didn’t remember, but Jared did. It only took a look though, and the memories feel back. Jensen was gone for another 392 days. Jared would watch his back, would ‘handle’ him as he had promised DeWitt, but when it was over Jared would be forced with it all alone. He loved Jensen and knew it was the only chance to save him, but he wasn’t so sure anymore there would be a way to save them when it was done.
Sometimes though… sometimes Romeo looked at him, and it looked like Jensen. It wasn’t possible, but there it was.