I Can See You
I Can See You
Most people would look at him and say time had been kind. Those that knew him wouldn’t venture to say because they’d want to know his mood before talking. He himself knew that time was cruel, far crueler than he’d ever believed possible once upon a time. Once upon a time, when he had a brother and that made all the difference.
The world hadn’t end in fiery hell and instead of demons, man had made his own mistakes and they’d ended up with the Pulse instead. The irony of it wasn’t lost on Sam Winchester who had managed to retain some of his former humor over the years.
He sat at the bar, taking a long drink from his bottle and watching the world go by. Terminal City was just like the others, only he could feel more freaks around him, people that looked and acted human but we’re quite. Azazel hadn’t been the only demon who thought a half-human prodigy might be worth looking into, especially in the last days of the war that no one but hunters and demons had known about.
There were still ghosts and demons about but Sam left those to other hunters. He looked for his own kind now, the only one strong enough to bend or break them, to make sure they stayed on the straight and narrow. Familiar pain ached in his heart because there had only been one person who had been able to keep him on the right path. He’d made Sam promise to be this, to keep the fight going, to do his part, and it was that and that alone that had kept him, all these years, from trying to get to his brother.
The bar he was at was loud, different from the others but so many memories all wrapped up in one bar stool or another that he lost himself to them. It wasn’t until he felt someone sit beside him that he started to pull back into the here and now.
“So what was that about Alec?”
He felt the man beside him move, knew a woman was coming closer from the sound of her voice. “Just want to be alone Max, let it go.”
His eyes widened because he knew that voice. He knew that voice and it took everything in him not to turn and look at the face because no matter how close the voice was, he knew it wasn’t Dean.
“I was wrong, okay? I admit it.”
“Yeah you were wrong Max, because you just wouldn’t leave it be. You just couldn’t believe that I could be something other than this right? Alec, he’s just a no-good slacker who couldn’t take it in the real world? Right? Isn’t that it?” The man downed his shot. “Just get the hell back Max.”
Sam knew to stay where he was, knew that following the man would be a mistake, but he was out the door after throwing a few bills on the bar. Max was staring at the chair the young man had been and Sam felt a little sorry for her because it was obvious that the man’s outburst had come out of nowhere for her.
Outside, he saw the man walking and it hurt because he was the right height, had the same color hair as Dean. He didn’t run, but stayed a healthy pace back, following him until he came to an apartment building and went inside.
He didn’t like to do it often, but he let his mind drift into others until he found someone that was looking at the other man inside the building. It was a punch to the gut, seeing his face for the first time but Alec’s name was in the other person’s head and he knew it was real. He watched Alec go inside the apartment and made a note of the apartment number.
He slid into the building easily enough and his breath caught as he came to the door. He leaned back against the wall trying to decide what to do next. It wasn’t Dean. No matter how he looked or sounded, he would never be Dean. But why that face and why now? He couldn’t sense anything demonic in the man but they’d been able to fool him a time or two.
He was about to knock on the door when it opened. The guy stared at him with Dean’s face and growled in Dean’s voice. “Why are you following me?”
Sam searched the other’s face, took a look at the lithe form and remembered the days when Dean had been young and strong and they’d not been broken yet. Alec let him look his fill and it was only when he reached his eyes did he realize how long he’d taken.
“See something you like?”
It was such a Dean thing to say and Sam felt himself laughing in spite of the situation. “I’m sorry. I just… you remind me of someone.”
“Oh god not another twin…”
“Uh.. no.” He said, smiling. “He was older than me so definitely not your twin.”
There was something appraising in his look and Sam wasn’t sure what he was going to do when the other man smiled slightly. “So, wanna come in for a drink?”
Sam smiled. “Yeah, I think I’d like that.”
When he got inside he realized it was much nicer inside than it was out. Alec stood back, letting him in and locking the door behind them. Years ago that would have bothered Sam, but being telekinetic meant never having to worry about locked doors ever again.
“Name’s Alec.” The other man said as he walked into the kitchen area.
“Sam.”
“So Sam, you make a habit of stalking your friend’s look alikes?”
Sam wasn’t sure what to say to that. The guy obviously knew he’d been followed from the bar and that meant he’d had some training. Sam was pretty good with surveillance so Alec had to be really good to pick it up. “You’re my first time.” He decided to go with.
Alec poured two drinks and handed one to Sam, raising his in a toast. “Here’s to your cherry.” Sam laughed as they clinked drinks and took a small sip of it.
Alec came around to the other room, taking a seat at one end of the couch and turned to watch Sam sit on the other end. “So, you want to tell me about this friend of yours?”
“Dean? You seem pretty interested in him. It’s why you let me in, right?” Alec’s eyes widened and they appraised each other for a second. Sam gave his most winning smile, “Let’s just be honest, shall we? I came because you look like Dean. He… he died a while back and I… I followed you. You don’t just resemble him. You look just like him. You sound just like him. I… I needed to follow you.”
-
Alec took in all in and nodded when he was finished. “I look like someone because I was made in a lab. I’m transgenic.”
Sam’s mouth opened at the words, knew what it meant and understood exactly how much trust Alec was giving him with those words. “Why would they give you his face?”
Alec smiled. “Seems like a pretty good one to me.” He said. “Don’t get too many complaints about it normally.” He looked at Sam then and before Sam realized he had moved, Alec was straddling his hips, pressing in to Sam. “Doesn’t seem like you have a complaint about it either.”
Sam wanted to tell him to stop, that this was wrong, but it wasn’t Dean and just because he looked like that didn’t mean he was Dean. This was a total stranger and there was no reason to stop him, no reason he couldn’t want this and the other man would never know the shame he felt for needing this as badly as he did.
He didn’t hesitate once he’d made his choice. He wrapped his hand around the base of Alec’s neck and pulled him down into his lips. The kiss was aggressive and bruising, both needing to control and push. When Alec pulled back Sam was gripping his shirt so hard he could almost hear the seams ripping. He loosened his grasp on the shirt and as soon as he did so Alec was removing it.
Sam sat up a little as Alec’s hands moved to his own shirt. As his hands dropped, he let them rest on Alec’s ass, pulling him close. “Tell me to go.”
Alec pushed Sam’s shoulders back with more strength than he’d thought he was capable of. “No.” He said, kissing Sam hard. “Got you this far, not letting you back out now.” Then he was crawling out of Sam’s lap and pulling him up. He kissed him, taking control and walking Sam backwards towards the bedroom.
He was stopped before he hit the bed, but it was only because Alec’s hands went to the front of his pants and began unbuttoning them. The zipper went down quickly, no building anticipation but the sudden rush of sensation as his pants were stripped off and he was shoved backwards onto the bed. Alec was naked quick enough without any help from Sam and he was crawling up the bed towards him, cat crawls that made him shiver.
When Alec pressed against him then it was all fast and frantic, kissed that bit and clashed, cocks rubbing together and Sam thought he could come just for that.
Alec bit into his neck, bringing blood to the surface. “Sam… let me…”
“Yeah.” He said, not knowing or caring what he was asking for. He wanted it anyway. Alec leaned over Sam, grabbing for something in the nightstand and Sam knew what it was he was going for.
He took a deep breath as Alec sat back on his heels. The other man smiled at him and there was such a resemblance to Dean that he had to bit his bottom lip to keep from saying his name.
“You think too much during sex Sam.” Alec said with a wicked grin as he leaned forward, taking the tip of Sam’s cock in his mouth.
That settled the thinking for the night and Sam found his hands falling to play in his short hair. He felt Alec’s hand on his balls, rolling and gripping them as he took Sam further into his mouth. He felt the slicked fingers moving across his entrance then, circling and finally the pressure as one finger slipped inside him.
He moaned from the dual sensations and then Alec was working him, stretching him good and wide. When Sam was begging for more, Alec removed the three fingers he’d worked into him and slicked himself up before pushing into Sam.
He felt the almost forgotten burn of it, the pain that was just this side of pleasure and relaxed into it, relaxed into the press of Alec’s body and the feel of his hands and lips and teeth. Alec’s pace is brutal but Sam’s hips are thrusting with his, forcing him deeper and harder.
When Sam comes, it’s with the wrong name on his lips but it doesn’t seem to faze Alec at all. He rolls off of Sam and after a few minutes he turns to look at him.
Sam took a deep breath as he watched Alec for a minute. “I don’t want to leave. For the first time in years, I don’t want to be on the road anymore.”
Alec licked his lips lightly. “I know you see someone else when you look at me Sam, but if you could see me too, I think I’d like to have you around.”
Sam brought their lips together, felt Alec’s smooth fingers against his cheek and he smiled. “Yeah, I can see you Alec.”
“Then don’t go.”
Sam smiled at him then. Ever since Dean’s death, he’d been drifting, living for the fight that had consumed their lives. He wouldn’t get a chance at Dean’s ending. Dean, diagnosed with cancer and deciding to end his life like a rock n roll god. Sam had helped him, helped him drink, helped him find the women and drugs, and in the end, he’d given Dean the pills that he would never wake from. Of all the things Dean Winchester had been capable of, dieing scared and weak in a hospital bed wasn’t one of them.
He looked at Alec and couldn’t imagine Alec giving up the fight, couldn’t imagine the younger man that defeated, but then he hadn’t lost everything the way Dean had, hadn’t been to Hell and back and spent his life running the way they had. He didn’t blame Dean for any of those things. He loved Dean. But Alec was different from Dean and he was starting to feel like he might be able to find something here, some happiness that had been denied him.
He smiled again, took a deep breath. It was time to put his ghosts to rest anyway.
“I will always see you Alec.”