Apologies
Title: Apologies
Author:
hunters_retreat
Fandom: TSCC
Pairing: John/Derek
Summary: There it was. The Lie.
Author's Note: I'm sure i wrote this for comment_fic about a month ago but somehow it never got posted on my LJ.
Apologies
He'd never seen it before, the way Derek looked at him for a moment, but then rolled his eyes and looked around before looking back. He's spent most of his life learning how to tell the truth about people, learning how to read them. Derek had never lied to him before and it was almost startling. He'd never expected it, not over something like this.
They were alone, the safe house Derek had taken him to after the recent close call was in a mostly empty building. It had been a sole barb, a single comment and now Derek couldn't look at him too closely.
John took a step back and tilted his head slightly, trying to take in the implication. It'd been a simple enough question. Derek was jumpy and pacing and he was driving John insane with it. The place was too small for much movement and every time he took a seat in the chair across from John he was up and moving a moment later. He broke finally, grabbing him by the wrist and stopping him. "Just sit the hell down Derek."
"I can't."
"What? Can't stand to be near me?" Things had been hard lately. He knew what Derek was capable of, knew what had happened to Jessie. It hung between them and sometimes John felt it was creating a rift while others seemed like it was pulling them closer together.
"Stop being an idiot John."
It hit him like a gunshot suddenly, the way Derek wouldn't touch him, the way he watched him. He pushed Derek back into the wall without waiting for more recon because he knew the answer already. "Or is it because you do want to be near me?"
"Don't be ridiculous."
But there it was. The lie.
John pushed into the space between them, Derek's eyes wide and almost panicked. Funny how metal coming at them from different angles didn't make him flinch but face to face with his nephew made him quake. "Was it him Derek? Or just me?" John asked quietly. "Did you want to fuck him before you knew? Or does that just make it dirtier for you, make it sweeter?"
Derek swallowed thickly and John wanted to lick across his throat, but he had to know the answer. He needed to know that Derek wanted him and not the John he would someday become. "Me or him Derek. Which one do you want?"
"You." The word was thrust at him, Derek pushing with his arms as well, knocking John off him as he moved as far away as the small studio apartment would allow. "I'm dealing with it John, just back off!"
John smiled and Derek looked startled by it. John was getting used to his doe eyes though, used to it and thrilled to see the way he could surprise the older man. He didn't say anything, just dropped his jacket to the floor. His shirt followed.
"What the hell?"
"You lied to me Derek. I think you owe me an apology for that."
Derek licked his lips, eyes roaming over his body even as he tried to keep them on his face. "An apology?"
John nodded as he reached out and hooked his finger in Derek's belt, pulling him close enough to start undoing it. "Yeah." He said, words a bare whisper against his uncle's lips. "And i've got a really good idea how you can start."
Author:
hunters_retreat
Fandom: TSCC
Pairing: John/Derek
Summary: There it was. The Lie.
Author's Note: I'm sure i wrote this for comment_fic about a month ago but somehow it never got posted on my LJ.
Apologies
He'd never seen it before, the way Derek looked at him for a moment, but then rolled his eyes and looked around before looking back. He's spent most of his life learning how to tell the truth about people, learning how to read them. Derek had never lied to him before and it was almost startling. He'd never expected it, not over something like this.
They were alone, the safe house Derek had taken him to after the recent close call was in a mostly empty building. It had been a sole barb, a single comment and now Derek couldn't look at him too closely.
John took a step back and tilted his head slightly, trying to take in the implication. It'd been a simple enough question. Derek was jumpy and pacing and he was driving John insane with it. The place was too small for much movement and every time he took a seat in the chair across from John he was up and moving a moment later. He broke finally, grabbing him by the wrist and stopping him. "Just sit the hell down Derek."
"I can't."
"What? Can't stand to be near me?" Things had been hard lately. He knew what Derek was capable of, knew what had happened to Jessie. It hung between them and sometimes John felt it was creating a rift while others seemed like it was pulling them closer together.
"Stop being an idiot John."
It hit him like a gunshot suddenly, the way Derek wouldn't touch him, the way he watched him. He pushed Derek back into the wall without waiting for more recon because he knew the answer already. "Or is it because you do want to be near me?"
"Don't be ridiculous."
But there it was. The lie.
John pushed into the space between them, Derek's eyes wide and almost panicked. Funny how metal coming at them from different angles didn't make him flinch but face to face with his nephew made him quake. "Was it him Derek? Or just me?" John asked quietly. "Did you want to fuck him before you knew? Or does that just make it dirtier for you, make it sweeter?"
Derek swallowed thickly and John wanted to lick across his throat, but he had to know the answer. He needed to know that Derek wanted him and not the John he would someday become. "Me or him Derek. Which one do you want?"
"You." The word was thrust at him, Derek pushing with his arms as well, knocking John off him as he moved as far away as the small studio apartment would allow. "I'm dealing with it John, just back off!"
John smiled and Derek looked startled by it. John was getting used to his doe eyes though, used to it and thrilled to see the way he could surprise the older man. He didn't say anything, just dropped his jacket to the floor. His shirt followed.
"What the hell?"
"You lied to me Derek. I think you owe me an apology for that."
Derek licked his lips, eyes roaming over his body even as he tried to keep them on his face. "An apology?"
John nodded as he reached out and hooked his finger in Derek's belt, pulling him close enough to start undoing it. "Yeah." He said, words a bare whisper against his uncle's lips. "And i've got a really good idea how you can start."