#161: The Morning After...
"The Morning After...."
Theatrical Muse
The morning after Jessica's death had probably been the prelude to the worst day of his life.
The grief, the anger - at the demon, at himself - the guilt all ate at him inside, never easing at all, just building up. The more he thought about it - and he couldn't stop thinking about it - the more it hurt; that constant pressure in his gut and heart, and that indescribable twist of pain no one could understand but someone who'd been through it before.
And he finally understood his father. Better than he'd ever wanted to in his life. But he didn't understand one thing. He didn't understand how dad could possibly live with it when all Sam wanted to do was curl up.
When all Sam had wanted to do, when he'd seen Jessica burning up on the ceiling like that, like his mom had, was stay right where he was and let the flames take him too.
The morning after Jessica's death was probably one of the hardest in his life; he didn't think he deserved to have survived the night. He hadn't wanted to.
And he certainly hadn't wanted to get up and see life go on when everything was all too familiar and yet would never be the same again.
~
Muse: Sam Winchester
Fandom: Supernatural
Word Count: 212
Theatrical Muse
The morning after Jessica's death had probably been the prelude to the worst day of his life.
The grief, the anger - at the demon, at himself - the guilt all ate at him inside, never easing at all, just building up. The more he thought about it - and he couldn't stop thinking about it - the more it hurt; that constant pressure in his gut and heart, and that indescribable twist of pain no one could understand but someone who'd been through it before.
And he finally understood his father. Better than he'd ever wanted to in his life. But he didn't understand one thing. He didn't understand how dad could possibly live with it when all Sam wanted to do was curl up.
When all Sam had wanted to do, when he'd seen Jessica burning up on the ceiling like that, like his mom had, was stay right where he was and let the flames take him too.
The morning after Jessica's death was probably one of the hardest in his life; he didn't think he deserved to have survived the night. He hadn't wanted to.
And he certainly hadn't wanted to get up and see life go on when everything was all too familiar and yet would never be the same again.
~
Muse: Sam Winchester
Fandom: Supernatural
Word Count: 212