In with both feet
I still don't know how to write about it, and I can explain more in person.
Last weekend's CFS meeting was a fucking trial. It involved travel to a strange and unnatural land where the sun never shines (the interior of a convention centre). It involved working on a team in an increasingly hostile environment (where people are instructed to follow you and watch who you talk to). It involved a crucible-like challenge where I got to represent my beliefs, and those of my student union, in front of about fifty, and then later, a hundred, less-than-friendly and very political people.
A short Cambellian quest: and I even got to take things away from it:
- a small network of experienced allies
very useful
- more respect for aboriginal activists
and the need to fix the budget shortfall in Kamloops where we've not sent them their money in two years
- a bottle of Bailie's
it's too bad I'm not much for drinking - volunteers?
- two copies of the BC Fed bylaws which are otherwise hard to get ahold of
I returned their binders as requested, but kept the contents
- a better understanding of politics
especially the unpoken rules of eaving things unspoken, and party congresses in the Soviet Union
- an idea of how to fix a lot of problems in the SFSS, and, to an extent, my life
it's called "the specific practice of open communication"
- a renewed sense of gender identity
funny how no-one at the women's caucus challenged me directly, but there was a lot of talk about "ahem... the women's caucus... for women" in my presence... and my vote wasn't counted until my teammate called them on it... and a lot of the more 'politically inclined' (read: "vicious") women's caucus delagates snubbed me.
I want to go back there with a genderfucked female-bodied person and... well, we'll see.
Anyway, some of the younger delegates figured it out pretty quick - but I think that one or two of the older female delegates just thought I was stone. None of the guys knew... since they weren't there, and no-one would ever talk about it with them - perish the thought!
To aid, Rowan decided to refer to me as "she" throughout the weekend. Jo and Caitlin noticed and obliged.
I'd been telling people that "I'm indifferent on pronouns," in part to avoid imposing. I thought that I really didn't care; but to tell the truth, I really do prefer the female pronouns, titles and all that, but I'm not offended if people pass on it. Gender-neutrals are also cool at present.
Like I said, Part of not insisting was not imposing, but part of it was trying to avoid what I feared and now seems to be the case - I really do prefer to think of myselrf as female - realizing this, crossing this threshold, I realize that while I can turn back, I certainly don't want to.
Well shit, now I've gone and done it.
So, I'm back now, returning with the elixir - whose name is 'open communication and honesty.'
In politics
In gender
In with both feet.
Last weekend's CFS meeting was a fucking trial. It involved travel to a strange and unnatural land where the sun never shines (the interior of a convention centre). It involved working on a team in an increasingly hostile environment (where people are instructed to follow you and watch who you talk to). It involved a crucible-like challenge where I got to represent my beliefs, and those of my student union, in front of about fifty, and then later, a hundred, less-than-friendly and very political people.
A short Cambellian quest: and I even got to take things away from it:
- a small network of experienced allies
very useful
- more respect for aboriginal activists
and the need to fix the budget shortfall in Kamloops where we've not sent them their money in two years
- a bottle of Bailie's
it's too bad I'm not much for drinking - volunteers?
- two copies of the BC Fed bylaws which are otherwise hard to get ahold of
I returned their binders as requested, but kept the contents
- a better understanding of politics
especially the unpoken rules of eaving things unspoken, and party congresses in the Soviet Union
- an idea of how to fix a lot of problems in the SFSS, and, to an extent, my life
it's called "the specific practice of open communication"
- a renewed sense of gender identity
funny how no-one at the women's caucus challenged me directly, but there was a lot of talk about "ahem... the women's caucus... for women" in my presence... and my vote wasn't counted until my teammate called them on it... and a lot of the more 'politically inclined' (read: "vicious") women's caucus delagates snubbed me.
I want to go back there with a genderfucked female-bodied person and... well, we'll see.
Anyway, some of the younger delegates figured it out pretty quick - but I think that one or two of the older female delegates just thought I was stone. None of the guys knew... since they weren't there, and no-one would ever talk about it with them - perish the thought!
To aid, Rowan decided to refer to me as "she" throughout the weekend. Jo and Caitlin noticed and obliged.
I'd been telling people that "I'm indifferent on pronouns," in part to avoid imposing. I thought that I really didn't care; but to tell the truth, I really do prefer the female pronouns, titles and all that, but I'm not offended if people pass on it. Gender-neutrals are also cool at present.
Like I said, Part of not insisting was not imposing, but part of it was trying to avoid what I feared and now seems to be the case - I really do prefer to think of myselrf as female - realizing this, crossing this threshold, I realize that while I can turn back, I certainly don't want to.
Well shit, now I've gone and done it.
So, I'm back now, returning with the elixir - whose name is 'open communication and honesty.'
In politics
In gender
In with both feet.