trying to be happy
everyone who reads my lj probably already knows my feelings towards school so i'm not going to repeat myself. this week i was trying really hard not to feel that way and stop concentrating on those things that suck about my life and start focusing on what's cool (not much) with my life. it started out good everyday i'd try to list those things in my life (not a lot) which i was grateful for. here's what i've come up with for this week:
1) my health - atleast i'm not dying
2) i don't have any major deformencies (6 toes, misproportioned head, lazy eye, etc.)- not that i've noticed anyways
3) i don't have a huge birth mark that covers half of my face
4) i don't have a beard
5) i ate a pizza today at bowling! yay!
6) chris brought me a cookie/brownie/stuff plate
well that about wraps it up..... not alot but people always focus on all the shit that's wrong with their life that they never focus on the good. personally i think this list is fucking pathetic but i'm trying not to dwell on that. this list only concludes that i don't have a whole of purpose to keep going. its not like i'm really serving a purpose in anyone's life either, so what's the point. just the hope that things will get better, that's all i have left. and i'm not a big believer in "hope" either. hope only lets you down and i've been let down too much to afford that. well friends is on right now so g2g. the #7 thing on my list. YAY!!
1) my health - atleast i'm not dying
2) i don't have any major deformencies (6 toes, misproportioned head, lazy eye, etc.)- not that i've noticed anyways
3) i don't have a huge birth mark that covers half of my face
4) i don't have a beard
5) i ate a pizza today at bowling! yay!
6) chris brought me a cookie/brownie/stuff plate
well that about wraps it up..... not alot but people always focus on all the shit that's wrong with their life that they never focus on the good. personally i think this list is fucking pathetic but i'm trying not to dwell on that. this list only concludes that i don't have a whole of purpose to keep going. its not like i'm really serving a purpose in anyone's life either, so what's the point. just the hope that things will get better, that's all i have left. and i'm not a big believer in "hope" either. hope only lets you down and i've been let down too much to afford that. well friends is on right now so g2g. the #7 thing on my list. YAY!!