and you're back again, only different than before...
... after the sky.
i stole this quote from my friend dan's away message:
"No two shows are alike in the making. Each show is a living piece of your life in a small unreal world with its own character and integrity; its own new set of memorable experiences and incredible happenings. You begin to love and adapt to its strangeness. Dreams harden into substance. Values come into focus. You wish it would never end. The dream world vanishes like mist before a rising sun; part of you vanishes with it. And back you land in the real world with a thud- fogged, uneasy, jittery, difficult to get along with. There is only one cure. A new show. A new, small unreal world; new visions, experiences, incredible happenings. Again you love it, adapt to it, wish it would never end. But end it does. Another part of you vanishes. That's show business."-Anonymous
i tried several times to write this entry. the page has been open for hours, with a blank window just waiing to receive the words that can express the emotions i feel about the show, and about the whole process of creating this wonderful thing that MCMP just put up. and i can't. because one emotion isn't discernable among the clutter. i think i went through the show not realizing. not seeing that this was it. and so during the run, i was just trying t do my best. to act well, to entertain. to do what i love. but then afterwards, when the audience errupted into a thunderous applause and my old friends came up to me and sincerely ocngratulated me on a fine piece of work and not just a performance. MCMP as a group has meant so much to me and has saved my life on so many occasions that leaving it is so bittersweet. i know that the underclassmen are amazing and dedicated, but it's like leaving a baby. a thing mark and i have raised up to a level that reaches the incredible. i'm so proud.
and so, final performance (at curtain and not before), i cried. but smiled. and when we came out after bows, and the overture was still going, the crowd jumped up and gave a standing O. after they had already died down, and i sobbed. and i looked at mom, and she had tears in her eyes. so i got hugs and cried some more and had just died down when i saw mark. so we did our customary hug, which requires space being made. bascially, a running leap into his arms and then a spin and a hug. and once again, everyone turned to us and applauded. just us. that was the moment for me. this is worth everything. i know how much we've done, and i'm so proud of it. i cannot say how much. it was a joy to do this show, and a perfect one to end our career at middlebury with. so much love went in, and it shone through in the performance. and i don't think i'll ever be the same.
i stole this quote from my friend dan's away message:
"No two shows are alike in the making. Each show is a living piece of your life in a small unreal world with its own character and integrity; its own new set of memorable experiences and incredible happenings. You begin to love and adapt to its strangeness. Dreams harden into substance. Values come into focus. You wish it would never end. The dream world vanishes like mist before a rising sun; part of you vanishes with it. And back you land in the real world with a thud- fogged, uneasy, jittery, difficult to get along with. There is only one cure. A new show. A new, small unreal world; new visions, experiences, incredible happenings. Again you love it, adapt to it, wish it would never end. But end it does. Another part of you vanishes. That's show business."-Anonymous
i tried several times to write this entry. the page has been open for hours, with a blank window just waiing to receive the words that can express the emotions i feel about the show, and about the whole process of creating this wonderful thing that MCMP just put up. and i can't. because one emotion isn't discernable among the clutter. i think i went through the show not realizing. not seeing that this was it. and so during the run, i was just trying t do my best. to act well, to entertain. to do what i love. but then afterwards, when the audience errupted into a thunderous applause and my old friends came up to me and sincerely ocngratulated me on a fine piece of work and not just a performance. MCMP as a group has meant so much to me and has saved my life on so many occasions that leaving it is so bittersweet. i know that the underclassmen are amazing and dedicated, but it's like leaving a baby. a thing mark and i have raised up to a level that reaches the incredible. i'm so proud.
and so, final performance (at curtain and not before), i cried. but smiled. and when we came out after bows, and the overture was still going, the crowd jumped up and gave a standing O. after they had already died down, and i sobbed. and i looked at mom, and she had tears in her eyes. so i got hugs and cried some more and had just died down when i saw mark. so we did our customary hug, which requires space being made. bascially, a running leap into his arms and then a spin and a hug. and once again, everyone turned to us and applauded. just us. that was the moment for me. this is worth everything. i know how much we've done, and i'm so proud of it. i cannot say how much. it was a joy to do this show, and a perfect one to end our career at middlebury with. so much love went in, and it shone through in the performance. and i don't think i'll ever be the same.