(no subject)
urfaveraven: *9 pm* *knocks at Shannon's door*
Mandy 4 Terry: *yawns, walking over and opening the door* Hel- Terry.
urfaveraven: Yeah. *lifts his eyes to her, breath catching* M-mandy.
Mandy 4 Terry: Do you want to come in? Sorry about the mess, I didn't have time to tidy
urfaveraven: I... *moves his eyes past her* Well yeah, I didn't think I came out here to stand outside all night.
Mandy 4 Terry: *moves out of the doorway* So, how are you?
urfaveraven: *steps inside and shrugs* Tired. *turns towards her as she closes the door* Sorry I'm late.
Mandy 4 Terry: Don't worry about it, I know what it's like to work long and weird hours
urfaveraven: *nods and glances about the room* Shannon home?
Mandy 4 Terry: No, she went to her mum's, I think she took Thunder with her
urfaveraven: *smiles slightly* That explains the silence.
Mandy 4 Terry: yeah. You want a drink or something?
urfaveraven: *moves towards the sofa and scratches his ear* I... no. No, I'm ok. *looks at the sofa but doesn't sit down* *looks at her briefly* Thanks though.
Mandy 4 Terry: *sits on the sofa* I had a million things to say, but I can't remember them anymore
urfaveraven: *watches her* Heh. Yeah. *puts his hands in his pockets* So you... y-you look good. Different.
Mandy 4 Terry: Thanks, so do you. It's weird, seeing you after all this time, brings certain feelings back
urfaveraven: *clears throat, looking over her, out the front window* Yeah. I-it does.
Mandy 4 Terry: *sighs, looking straight ahead* Why didn't you believe me about Greg and Adam?
urfaveraven: *sighs, closing his eyes momentarily* Because I didn't. I-I don't know. Goddamn Zabini. *jaw tightens as his tomach turns* It all stems from him. You and him.
Mandy 4 Terry: I wish it never happened. he's a rat bastard, I don't know how I could have done what I did, especially when I loved you so much
urfaveraven: *can't look at her* Yeah... well... th-the past is... it's all in the past.
Mandy 4 Terry: yeah it is
urfaveraven: *shifts awkwardly on his feet* *after a long silence* So how's life treating you? Since I fucked everything up?
Mandy 4 Terry: Not bad. You already know about my graduating and becoming a doctor. I got a temp job at the hospital where I did placement at, and when the contract ended, I got offered a job over here. Nothing exciting
urfaveraven: *looks at her* Sounds pretty exciting.
Mandy 4 Terry: *looks at him* Not really, I'm sure your life is far more exciting
urfaveraven: *snorts slightly* Yeah well, I've been at the wharf for some time now. Working for the vet hospital. Nothing like living overseas.
Mandy 4 Terry: I wish I'd come back three years ago. It was hell working there, I mean, all my friends moved back home, Adam moved to California with his boyfriend, and my mum moved to Hong Kong or something, leaving me on my own
urfaveraven: *shakes his head smugly* She left you again huh?
Mandy 4 Terry: yeah, I thought she could actually change and become a better mother, I was such an idiot
urfaveraven: *face softens* You're not an idiot.
Mandy 4 Terry: I am, I'm an idiot for thinking she could change, I'm an idiot for staying in America, and I'm an idiot for thinking I could get over you
urfaveraven: Stop. You're not. *meets her eyes*
Mandy 4 Terry: I am, Merlin Terry, I still love you, that makes me an idiot
urfaveraven: *drops his eyes* Please don't. *rubs his forehead* I-I thought you wanted me here for the cat... *brow furrows*... which... I... clearly forgot....
Mandy 4 Terry: No, I told you, we needed to talk about things, that Angel didn't matter for now
urfaveraven: *moves to sit on the sofa, afraid his legs will give out* There's not much to talk about. I-I'm sorry I didn't believe you, I-I'm sorry I let Zabini get in my head a-and I-I'm sorry I freaked out with you in America. *pauses* *softer* But we can't go back.
Mandy 4 Terry: *blinks back tears* I know, you're with Luna a-and *wipes her eyes* and you don't love me anymore
urfaveraven: *closes his eyes, hurting* *barely audible* Mandy... please don't...
Mandy 4 Terry: *sniffs* don't what?
urfaveraven: *turns his head from her* Don't cry. Th-this is killing me.
Mandy 4 Terry: killing you? why should it be killing you? you have a pretty girlfriend who you love and who loves you back
urfaveraven: *lifts his eyes to the ceiling* Uh.. because I loved you. *turns to her, brow furrowed* You think I've been fine all these years? That for an entire year I couldn't breath in without feeling a huge knot in my stomach?
Mandy 4 Terry: *looks away from him* I almost failed my first year, I missed that many classes because I was so heartbroken. I didn't stop crying for a week. I've not been fine, and I'm no where near to fine. My life means nothing to me anymore
urfaveraven: *shakes his head, making a face* Mandy, no. It'll all be okay. You and me, we'll be okay. Your life's not ended. You've got a great job and you just moved back home. Don't expect so much so quickly since uprooting yourself. I-it takes time.
Mandy 4 Terry: we'll be friends, only friends, and I can't live like that. I don't want to be just friends with you
urfaveraven: *searches her face* *forgets what he was going to say*
Mandy 4 Terry: I can't be just friends with you
urfaveraven: *opens his mouth to speak and pauses a moment* *throat dry* W-we can't be anything then. *digs his fingers into the sofa arm, feeling he's been hit in the stomach*
Mandy 4 Terry: I'm sorry Terry, but it just wouldn't work, I'd want you too much, and it'd tear me appart
urfaveraven: *quietly* Fine.
Mandy 4 Terry: *looks over at him* it's better this way
urfaveraven: *shrugs* Why'd you have me here? *looks at her* To give me this ultimatum?
Mandy 4 Terry: No, I wanted to talk to you, about this whole Greg and Adam thing
urfaveraven: *gets up* Fine. We've talked about it.
Mandy 4 Terry: Please don't leave like this
urfaveraven: What do you want me to do? Hang out, ch-chat some more about Greg? Zabini? *clenched jaw* I can barely stand as is it.
Mandy 4 Terry: I want things to go back to as they were
urfaveraven: Are you listening? That was a lifetime ago. I-I've already fucked it all up. There's nothing there.
Mandy 4 Terry: You didn't fuck it up, it was fucked up for us. We can start again
urfaveraven: *steps towards her* *stresses each word* We can not, Mandy. *softer* Other people are involved now...
Mandy 4 Terry: You mean Luna
urfaveraven: *meets her eyes*
Mandy 4 Terry: But, I love you
urfaveraven: You can't. Y-you can't even trust me. We can't trust each other... our judgements get so easily clouded...
Mandy 4 Terry: I do trust you Terry, I trust you with my life
urfaveraven: *frowns and drops his eyes from her* I have to go... should *motions to the door* ...just go...
Mandy 4 Terry: I love you, I always will, don't do this
urfaveraven: I can't not do it. *studies the floor then moves towards the door*
Mandy 4 Terry: You aren't making sense
urfaveraven: *furrows brow* I-I am, Mandy. I can't stay here. You said 'don't do this' and I need to. I-I need to go. *scratches the side of his face, rattling on* I-I didn't even bring Angel... I-I'll go get her packed up and send her over...
Mandy 4 Terry: I don't want you to go
urfaveraven: *looks at her* You want me to stay here? A-at Shannon's?
Mandy 4 Terry: I want you to stay with me
urfaveraven: Mandy. *gives her a look* *goes to the door and opens it* I-I'll be around if you need anything... help you get on your feet around here.
Mandy 4 Terry: Terry, please *looks up at him*
urfaveraven: *looks back at her* A few years with no word from you and now you're desparate for my company?
Mandy 4 Terry: I was busy, I wanted to contact you
urfaveraven: *nods* Busy... *a little hurt* I know how it goes... *turns from her again* Help Shannon out a bit, that'll get you busy again. *lies* I have to get home for dinner.
Mandy 4 Terry: You said we'd be together forever, you lied to me
urfaveraven: *jaw tightens* Goodnight, Mandy. *leaves*
Mandy 4 Terry: *stares at the door, tears rolling down her face*
Mandy 4 Terry: *yawns, walking over and opening the door* Hel- Terry.
urfaveraven: Yeah. *lifts his eyes to her, breath catching* M-mandy.
Mandy 4 Terry: Do you want to come in? Sorry about the mess, I didn't have time to tidy
urfaveraven: I... *moves his eyes past her* Well yeah, I didn't think I came out here to stand outside all night.
Mandy 4 Terry: *moves out of the doorway* So, how are you?
urfaveraven: *steps inside and shrugs* Tired. *turns towards her as she closes the door* Sorry I'm late.
Mandy 4 Terry: Don't worry about it, I know what it's like to work long and weird hours
urfaveraven: *nods and glances about the room* Shannon home?
Mandy 4 Terry: No, she went to her mum's, I think she took Thunder with her
urfaveraven: *smiles slightly* That explains the silence.
Mandy 4 Terry: yeah. You want a drink or something?
urfaveraven: *moves towards the sofa and scratches his ear* I... no. No, I'm ok. *looks at the sofa but doesn't sit down* *looks at her briefly* Thanks though.
Mandy 4 Terry: *sits on the sofa* I had a million things to say, but I can't remember them anymore
urfaveraven: *watches her* Heh. Yeah. *puts his hands in his pockets* So you... y-you look good. Different.
Mandy 4 Terry: Thanks, so do you. It's weird, seeing you after all this time, brings certain feelings back
urfaveraven: *clears throat, looking over her, out the front window* Yeah. I-it does.
Mandy 4 Terry: *sighs, looking straight ahead* Why didn't you believe me about Greg and Adam?
urfaveraven: *sighs, closing his eyes momentarily* Because I didn't. I-I don't know. Goddamn Zabini. *jaw tightens as his tomach turns* It all stems from him. You and him.
Mandy 4 Terry: I wish it never happened. he's a rat bastard, I don't know how I could have done what I did, especially when I loved you so much
urfaveraven: *can't look at her* Yeah... well... th-the past is... it's all in the past.
Mandy 4 Terry: yeah it is
urfaveraven: *shifts awkwardly on his feet* *after a long silence* So how's life treating you? Since I fucked everything up?
Mandy 4 Terry: Not bad. You already know about my graduating and becoming a doctor. I got a temp job at the hospital where I did placement at, and when the contract ended, I got offered a job over here. Nothing exciting
urfaveraven: *looks at her* Sounds pretty exciting.
Mandy 4 Terry: *looks at him* Not really, I'm sure your life is far more exciting
urfaveraven: *snorts slightly* Yeah well, I've been at the wharf for some time now. Working for the vet hospital. Nothing like living overseas.
Mandy 4 Terry: I wish I'd come back three years ago. It was hell working there, I mean, all my friends moved back home, Adam moved to California with his boyfriend, and my mum moved to Hong Kong or something, leaving me on my own
urfaveraven: *shakes his head smugly* She left you again huh?
Mandy 4 Terry: yeah, I thought she could actually change and become a better mother, I was such an idiot
urfaveraven: *face softens* You're not an idiot.
Mandy 4 Terry: I am, I'm an idiot for thinking she could change, I'm an idiot for staying in America, and I'm an idiot for thinking I could get over you
urfaveraven: Stop. You're not. *meets her eyes*
Mandy 4 Terry: I am, Merlin Terry, I still love you, that makes me an idiot
urfaveraven: *drops his eyes* Please don't. *rubs his forehead* I-I thought you wanted me here for the cat... *brow furrows*... which... I... clearly forgot....
Mandy 4 Terry: No, I told you, we needed to talk about things, that Angel didn't matter for now
urfaveraven: *moves to sit on the sofa, afraid his legs will give out* There's not much to talk about. I-I'm sorry I didn't believe you, I-I'm sorry I let Zabini get in my head a-and I-I'm sorry I freaked out with you in America. *pauses* *softer* But we can't go back.
Mandy 4 Terry: *blinks back tears* I know, you're with Luna a-and *wipes her eyes* and you don't love me anymore
urfaveraven: *closes his eyes, hurting* *barely audible* Mandy... please don't...
Mandy 4 Terry: *sniffs* don't what?
urfaveraven: *turns his head from her* Don't cry. Th-this is killing me.
Mandy 4 Terry: killing you? why should it be killing you? you have a pretty girlfriend who you love and who loves you back
urfaveraven: *lifts his eyes to the ceiling* Uh.. because I loved you. *turns to her, brow furrowed* You think I've been fine all these years? That for an entire year I couldn't breath in without feeling a huge knot in my stomach?
Mandy 4 Terry: *looks away from him* I almost failed my first year, I missed that many classes because I was so heartbroken. I didn't stop crying for a week. I've not been fine, and I'm no where near to fine. My life means nothing to me anymore
urfaveraven: *shakes his head, making a face* Mandy, no. It'll all be okay. You and me, we'll be okay. Your life's not ended. You've got a great job and you just moved back home. Don't expect so much so quickly since uprooting yourself. I-it takes time.
Mandy 4 Terry: we'll be friends, only friends, and I can't live like that. I don't want to be just friends with you
urfaveraven: *searches her face* *forgets what he was going to say*
Mandy 4 Terry: I can't be just friends with you
urfaveraven: *opens his mouth to speak and pauses a moment* *throat dry* W-we can't be anything then. *digs his fingers into the sofa arm, feeling he's been hit in the stomach*
Mandy 4 Terry: I'm sorry Terry, but it just wouldn't work, I'd want you too much, and it'd tear me appart
urfaveraven: *quietly* Fine.
Mandy 4 Terry: *looks over at him* it's better this way
urfaveraven: *shrugs* Why'd you have me here? *looks at her* To give me this ultimatum?
Mandy 4 Terry: No, I wanted to talk to you, about this whole Greg and Adam thing
urfaveraven: *gets up* Fine. We've talked about it.
Mandy 4 Terry: Please don't leave like this
urfaveraven: What do you want me to do? Hang out, ch-chat some more about Greg? Zabini? *clenched jaw* I can barely stand as is it.
Mandy 4 Terry: I want things to go back to as they were
urfaveraven: Are you listening? That was a lifetime ago. I-I've already fucked it all up. There's nothing there.
Mandy 4 Terry: You didn't fuck it up, it was fucked up for us. We can start again
urfaveraven: *steps towards her* *stresses each word* We can not, Mandy. *softer* Other people are involved now...
Mandy 4 Terry: You mean Luna
urfaveraven: *meets her eyes*
Mandy 4 Terry: But, I love you
urfaveraven: You can't. Y-you can't even trust me. We can't trust each other... our judgements get so easily clouded...
Mandy 4 Terry: I do trust you Terry, I trust you with my life
urfaveraven: *frowns and drops his eyes from her* I have to go... should *motions to the door* ...just go...
Mandy 4 Terry: I love you, I always will, don't do this
urfaveraven: I can't not do it. *studies the floor then moves towards the door*
Mandy 4 Terry: You aren't making sense
urfaveraven: *furrows brow* I-I am, Mandy. I can't stay here. You said 'don't do this' and I need to. I-I need to go. *scratches the side of his face, rattling on* I-I didn't even bring Angel... I-I'll go get her packed up and send her over...
Mandy 4 Terry: I don't want you to go
urfaveraven: *looks at her* You want me to stay here? A-at Shannon's?
Mandy 4 Terry: I want you to stay with me
urfaveraven: Mandy. *gives her a look* *goes to the door and opens it* I-I'll be around if you need anything... help you get on your feet around here.
Mandy 4 Terry: Terry, please *looks up at him*
urfaveraven: *looks back at her* A few years with no word from you and now you're desparate for my company?
Mandy 4 Terry: I was busy, I wanted to contact you
urfaveraven: *nods* Busy... *a little hurt* I know how it goes... *turns from her again* Help Shannon out a bit, that'll get you busy again. *lies* I have to get home for dinner.
Mandy 4 Terry: You said we'd be together forever, you lied to me
urfaveraven: *jaw tightens* Goodnight, Mandy. *leaves*
Mandy 4 Terry: *stares at the door, tears rolling down her face*