Villetantism

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Another from the archive, February 2001. Written for and first published in oxbridge.tat, a newsgroup whose sole purpose was distraction. The thread was entitled "Utilitarianism", but it had evidently drifted a long way from there. Let's now call it

Incompletions

I never reared a young gazelle
   To glad me with its soft bright eye;
I never wrote a villanelle,

For when the verse is flowing well
   There are so many forms to try:
"I never reared a young gazelle",

"I do not love thee, Doctor Fell",
   (Although the poet knew not why,
I never wrote a villanelle),

"Send not to know for whom the bell"---
   No! "A nos moutons!" is the cry.
"I never reared a young gazelle..."

...but on the primrose path to hell,
   I start to write, then lay it by.
I never wrote a villanelle,

Ballade or Thesis; now I smell
The fear of those who, dying, cry
   "I never reared a young gazelle,
    I never wrote a villanelle".