AOL Men
What is up with AOL men? Seriously... if another imbecile IM's me asking me the same tired ass questions like a/s/l? Do you cyber? What's your bra size? Can I call you/Will you call me? Do you like white men?(when I'm in a chat room specifically NAMED for that) Would you perform some sexual act.... blah blah freakin blah! I swear by all that is holy, I'm going to become a hacker and ruin your pathetic little life.
I always wonder what kind of answers these asses are getting that they would continually ask the same questions. Are there a lot of equally dim-witted easily pleased women out there that are feeding the fire? If there are, PLEASE, PLEASE for the love of God terminate your AOL membership. Save your fellow woman! As long as you're around these idiots will prosper!
Alright, so I'm being a tad bit melodramatic. Seriously though, I'm sick and tired of being asked these stupid questions. I am equally tired of the rest of the men who start out being so cordial and seemingly interested in me the person, not me the potentially huge-breasted fantasy fulfilling sex fiend, but then turn out to be exactly the same as the former. How dumb exactly do you think we are?
Every so often you get that one guy who's just passing the time, or genuinely is interested in you. I have been on AOL under various SN's for ten years this October. In those ten years, I have met exactly 5 men who were ONLY interested in chatting, getting to know me, passing the time or anything else NOT related to sex. That's right, 5!! That leaves me 5 fingers in which to accurately input the rest of the dumbasses names into my blocked list. (Those would be the same 5 fingers I'm NOT using when you're asking me if I want to cyber, if I do cyber, if I'll phone ya, and if you're dumbass comments have succeeded in arousing me. Which guess what? They're not. Even if I say they are, they're not. I'm laughing hysterically that you would be stimulated in ANY way by that. Oh yeah baby, stroke that mouse! It feels so good! Oh puh-lease!! get a grip buddy.....)
It doesn't seem like a very good record. On average, I spend oh I'm going to say 12 chattable hours on aol every week. I speak to on average 15 men every single week. For all of you mathematically challenged people out there, on average, in a ten year span I have had the misfortune of speaking with 7800 men from across this wonderful nation of ours and only 5 of them have never uttered those classic lines to me. Are you freakin' kidding me? 7800 men on AOL and 7795 of you are annoying perverted dipsh*ts.
That's another thing AOL men... do you honestly think that I care how big your *cough* member is? First of all, in the first 5 minutes of meeting you, I have no intention whatsoever of EVER seeing it in person, much less enjoying whatever size it was. Secondly, you're not fooling anyone. Every chick on AOL knows that whatever size a man says his penis is, you have to subtract 4 inches and remember that they own a penis pump and have an appointment next Tuesday with a sex therapist to discuss their sexual dysfunctions at the encouragement of their wives.
Which brings me to another point. Men, you're ALWAYS going to get caught. Especially when it says IN your profile that you're married. Think before you click that send button buddy. And trust me, if I wanted to bad enough, I could bust ya with your wife for that alone. Haven't you learned by now, the Internet is NOT a private place? Call up Mayor James West in Spokane. I think he'll tell you a thing or two about that! My mother has this lovely little saying she's always telling me. "What is done in the dark, will come to light." Remember that.
Question for ya....
Do I have a sign on my forehead? Does it read: Psychos, jerks, perverts, mentally challenged, emotionally stunted, immature and completely uninteresting, lying, cheating, screw-ups APPLY HERE?
I think not!
So back the hell up!
I always wonder what kind of answers these asses are getting that they would continually ask the same questions. Are there a lot of equally dim-witted easily pleased women out there that are feeding the fire? If there are, PLEASE, PLEASE for the love of God terminate your AOL membership. Save your fellow woman! As long as you're around these idiots will prosper!
Alright, so I'm being a tad bit melodramatic. Seriously though, I'm sick and tired of being asked these stupid questions. I am equally tired of the rest of the men who start out being so cordial and seemingly interested in me the person, not me the potentially huge-breasted fantasy fulfilling sex fiend, but then turn out to be exactly the same as the former. How dumb exactly do you think we are?
Every so often you get that one guy who's just passing the time, or genuinely is interested in you. I have been on AOL under various SN's for ten years this October. In those ten years, I have met exactly 5 men who were ONLY interested in chatting, getting to know me, passing the time or anything else NOT related to sex. That's right, 5!! That leaves me 5 fingers in which to accurately input the rest of the dumbasses names into my blocked list. (Those would be the same 5 fingers I'm NOT using when you're asking me if I want to cyber, if I do cyber, if I'll phone ya, and if you're dumbass comments have succeeded in arousing me. Which guess what? They're not. Even if I say they are, they're not. I'm laughing hysterically that you would be stimulated in ANY way by that. Oh yeah baby, stroke that mouse! It feels so good! Oh puh-lease!! get a grip buddy.....)
It doesn't seem like a very good record. On average, I spend oh I'm going to say 12 chattable hours on aol every week. I speak to on average 15 men every single week. For all of you mathematically challenged people out there, on average, in a ten year span I have had the misfortune of speaking with 7800 men from across this wonderful nation of ours and only 5 of them have never uttered those classic lines to me. Are you freakin' kidding me? 7800 men on AOL and 7795 of you are annoying perverted dipsh*ts.
That's another thing AOL men... do you honestly think that I care how big your *cough* member is? First of all, in the first 5 minutes of meeting you, I have no intention whatsoever of EVER seeing it in person, much less enjoying whatever size it was. Secondly, you're not fooling anyone. Every chick on AOL knows that whatever size a man says his penis is, you have to subtract 4 inches and remember that they own a penis pump and have an appointment next Tuesday with a sex therapist to discuss their sexual dysfunctions at the encouragement of their wives.
Which brings me to another point. Men, you're ALWAYS going to get caught. Especially when it says IN your profile that you're married. Think before you click that send button buddy. And trust me, if I wanted to bad enough, I could bust ya with your wife for that alone. Haven't you learned by now, the Internet is NOT a private place? Call up Mayor James West in Spokane. I think he'll tell you a thing or two about that! My mother has this lovely little saying she's always telling me. "What is done in the dark, will come to light." Remember that.
Question for ya....
Do I have a sign on my forehead? Does it read: Psychos, jerks, perverts, mentally challenged, emotionally stunted, immature and completely uninteresting, lying, cheating, screw-ups APPLY HERE?
I think not!
So back the hell up!