Do or do not there is no try.
I am so tired of trying.
I am so tired of having to try.
My life should not be determined by someone else. Yet, here I sit, afraid to move. Every day I feel as though I lose myself more and more. I come back, but for how long can I promise myself a return.
I dream. I dream all day long. Of a relationship - with reciprocating respect, honesty, and love.
-contradictorily- I dream of being alone. Wishful for so much, yet satisfied by none. Perhaps, I am growing less open hearted. I feel warm to the touch. Perhaps, I am too open hearted. I get hurt often.
I wish he would leave me alone. Get away from me. I don't care that there is something missing inside of you that clings to the very hateful side of me. He makes me sick; nauseous. I've lost my appetite. I'm losing weight. What does, "I won't stop trying" mean any way. I don't love you and I have not loved you in a long time. I felt trapped and so I encouraged myself to play along. I can't do it anymore.
No roommates. I want go at it on my own. I don't want to deal with anyone else's problems. I've got enough of my own.
I don't make enough money. I will no longer be able to go to college. A babysitter will no longer be so readily available. The convenience is not worth the misery.
Stop needing to be around me. Stop talking to me as if it were all ok. I just wrapped up telling you it is bloody over and you are pining about wanting to spend time together. He's MENTAL. Worse - he is making ME mental.
Please, let me go. Please, just let me go.
I've got to go... for the last time. I'm done. Fucking Christ.
I am so tired of having to try.
My life should not be determined by someone else. Yet, here I sit, afraid to move. Every day I feel as though I lose myself more and more. I come back, but for how long can I promise myself a return.
I dream. I dream all day long. Of a relationship - with reciprocating respect, honesty, and love.
-contradictorily- I dream of being alone. Wishful for so much, yet satisfied by none. Perhaps, I am growing less open hearted. I feel warm to the touch. Perhaps, I am too open hearted. I get hurt often.
I wish he would leave me alone. Get away from me. I don't care that there is something missing inside of you that clings to the very hateful side of me. He makes me sick; nauseous. I've lost my appetite. I'm losing weight. What does, "I won't stop trying" mean any way. I don't love you and I have not loved you in a long time. I felt trapped and so I encouraged myself to play along. I can't do it anymore.
No roommates. I want go at it on my own. I don't want to deal with anyone else's problems. I've got enough of my own.
I don't make enough money. I will no longer be able to go to college. A babysitter will no longer be so readily available. The convenience is not worth the misery.
Stop needing to be around me. Stop talking to me as if it were all ok. I just wrapped up telling you it is bloody over and you are pining about wanting to spend time together. He's MENTAL. Worse - he is making ME mental.
Please, let me go. Please, just let me go.
I've got to go... for the last time. I'm done. Fucking Christ.