Farscape Ficlit - "In Passing"
Disclaimer: You know the drill. *grin*
Title: In Passing
Genre: Farscape ficlit; John and Aeryn's kids grieve
Rating: G
Timeline: Several years after PKW
The soft hum of Moya's life surrounded me, following me out onto the Terrace as I stood silently looking out upon the stars. It was the sound that had lulled me to sleep as a child, and I took comfort in it now. Just as I took comfort in the sight of the stars about me, those that my father had once told me were my 'playground' when I was a child here on Moya. With care, I searched for the one star that I most needed to see at this moment.
"Ah, there," I whispered, spotting the brightest star, the one that my father had always named 'Aeryn.'
Wrapped in the soft hum of Moya, looking out upon the stars, I was very glad that my sisters and I had been able to contact Moya, Pilot, and the others. It was right that they should be gathering here, coming once more to the beginning. In this place, memories of my mother and father filled every chamber and their loving voices echoed down every corridor.
I felt a wistful sort of smile slip over my face as I spoke softly, "They used to dance here. I remember seeing them," I closed my eyes, letting the memory wash over me. "My mother would set her feet on top of my father's and she would rest her head on his shoulder. He would wrap his arms around her and hold her tight against him. And his face would be filled with all the wonder of his love for her. They would be so wrapped up in each other, dancing to a music that only they could hear."
"Moya and I remember," Pilot said quietly.
I opened my eyes slowly, taking in the stars once more before I made my way out the door and into the corridors of Moya. It wasn't difficult to find my sister Claudia; she was right where I had thought she would be.
I stood in the doorway of what had once been our parents' room on board Moya, watching my sister silently make her way through the room. Her hands brushed across a table and the wall, then over the bed as she felt her way through the echoes of our parents.
Seeing my sister listen to the voices of memory, brought to my mind my own remembrances.
"I remember, they used to sit on the bed and dad would brush mom's hair," I said softly.
My sister's blue eyes, filled with tears, met mine. She absently brushed her long, dark hair back from her face. "Mom would sit in front of dad, her eyes closed, leaning back a little bit," she said softly.
"Dad would brush her hair gently," I continued.
"And he would kiss her neck every so often," Claudia whispered as she remembered.
"Or smell her hair," I added.
"Because mom would scent it just for him," Claudia said, a small smile on her face as she remembered.
I nodded, sharing the memory of our parents here on Moya. "Where's Ny'eri?" I asked.
"She was hungry, so I told her that it was okay to go get something to eat," Claudia answered.
"How's she doing?"
"As well as can be expected," Claudia replied, her voice full of concern for our fifteen cycles old sister.
"Let's go find her."
Claudia nodded and walked out into the corridors with me. We reached the galley, but the only sign of our sister was the mess that she had left behind. Claudia sighed softly and began cleaning it up while I spoke to Pilot. "Pilot, can you locate Ny'eri for me?"
"She is here with me, D'argo," Pilot's calm voice answered.
I sighed softly myself and smiled a little, thinking that I should have guessed it; Ny'eri was fascinated with Pilot. "Thank you, Pilot, Claudia and I will come get her in a moment."
"Of course, D'argo," Pilot answered in his soothing voice.
I looked around the galley quietly for a moment. Even here, the voices and echoes of my mother and father lingered. "I remember one of the first times that mom cooked a special meal here for us," I said quietly. "I couldn't have been more than four or five cycles old, meaning that you were only two or three."
"Go on," Claudia prompted.
"Mom had gone to all this trouble to cook this meal for the Earth holiday, Christmas, but," I paused.
"But, what?" Claudia asked.
"Well, it was," I felt a wry smile work its way onto my face. "It was complete dren."
My sister giggled softly.
"I'm sorry, but that's the truth," I said, smiling. "And I wasn't eating any of it. But dad," I was half laughing now myself, "dad was eating every bite like it was the best meal ever. I remember that he had this big goofy grin on his face as he ate, and if you hadn't tasted the food, you would have thought it was the best meal ever. He just sat there eating, with this look of complete adoration on his face as he watched mom. Then, mom sat down and took a bite. That's when she realized that it really was dren, and dad was eating it for her."
"What happened then?" Claudia asked through her smile.
"Mom just looked over to dad, and she got this funny look in her eye. Before we knew it, mom had tossed some of the food right at dad. It hit him directly between the eyes with this wet kind of sound. And she was laughing."
"What did dad do?"
"What do you think? He threw some back at her with this big goofy grin on his face too. You were giggling like nothing else. Then it just turned into a big food fight." I was laughing as much as Claudia by this point in the story. "I remember that it ended in this big mess, all of us covered in goop, and dad kissing mom, saying 'Merry Christmas Aeryn,"
I felt my smile turn quietly sad.
My sister brushed her hands together lightly and looked around herself before she spoke, "Well, it's cleaned up here," Claudia said quietly. "Let's go get Ny'eri."
I nodded, and we both headed down to Pilot's Den. We spotted our youngest sister perched out of the way on Pilot's console. 1812, the DRD that dad had taught to play the classic overture, sat next to Ny'eri, chirping quietly.
"Hey guys," the dark haired, blue eyed girl said eagerly. "Come listen to this."
Ny'eri, of all of us, looked the most like our mother. I imagined that she looked a lot like our mother must have looked at her age. Pilot had seen it too, the resemblance to Aeryn Sun, and maybe that was part of why he had taken to her and let her pester him so much. Most of our time here on Moya, Ny'eri had spent in the Pilot's Den.
"Listen to what?" Claudia asked.
"This," she said to us, then turned to Pilot. "Pilot, will you play it for them too?"
"Yes, Ny'eri Sun Crichton," Pilot said in his serene voice and moved one of his hands to activate a panel on his console. As soon as he did, we heard the voices of our parents filling the Den like ghosts out of the past.
"Come on, Aeryn," our father was saying. "You know you want to."
I could imagine my father grinning at my mother, pouring on his boyish charm to get her to do whatever he was asking her to do.
"And how do you know this, John Crichton?" My mother was asking, and I could hear the smile in her voice.
"Because you love me,” my father answered confidently.
My mother laughed lightly in the recording. Then, with a soft sigh from her, we heard the most beautiful voice begin to sing. Ny'eri was sitting by Pilot looking very pleased with herself while Claudia and I exchanged surprised looks. The voice in the recording, our mother's voice, soared and swooped effortlessly through the notes of the love song.
When the song was done, we heard our father's voice once more as he sighed with seeming contentment, "Ahh, Aeryn, I love you." The recording ended and again Moya's soft sounds were predominant in the chamber.
"I didn't know that mother could sing like that," Claudia said, wonder in her voice.
"I didn't either," I said, knowing the same wonder filled my voice. "Pilot?"
The Leviathan Pilot's voice was gentle as he spoke, "Your mother often sang to your father when no one else but Moya or I could hear. Moya liked your mother's singing very much, it was she that requested that we remember it. If you like, I can arrange for you to have recordings of those times that we heard your mother sing."
"Yes, Pilot," Ny'eri answered eagerly.
"No, Pilot," I said at the same time, and Ny'eri scowled at me. I addressed her, "Ny'eri, understand. If mom had wanted to share this with people besides dad, she would have."
"But Moya and Pilot got to hear it," Ny'eri protested.
Claudia spoke to her sister gently then, "No, Ny'eri. I think that I understand what D'argo means. This was something that mom meant just for dad, only dad. They shared lots with us, with everyone, but this," Claudia paused, searching for the words.
"This was their own special thing, Ny'eri. Something just the two of them shared. I think that we should let it remain that way, even if it would be nice to hear their voices again.," I completed the thought.
"Okay," Ny'eri conceded, not entirely happy about it. But she would understand someday, I was certain. She addressed Pilot, "I guess we don't want them, Pilot."
"Very well," he said, Pilot scanned his console before he spoke once more, "The others are requesting permission to board."
"Of course, Pilot," I said.
"We'll meet them D'argo and bring them to the Terrace," Claudia said quietly, her voice subdued.
I nodded, thanked Pilot, and followed my sisters out of the chamber. They went to the docking bay, and I headed back to the Terrace. As I made my way through Moya's corridors, I could hear the voices of my parents as I remembered them in this place; arguments full of anger and passion, matched by moments of laughter and joy. I could remember them working together to fix something on my father's module, or eating in the galley, or sitting on the Terrace wrapped up in each other.
This last, I thought of as I entered the star filled chamber. I searched the stars again, once more finding my mother's. I had seen my father's star charts, full of names that I had no reference for; Earth names like Huey, Louie, and Dewie, Larry, Curly, and Moe. The one constant was the central star, always named Aeryn.
The sound of voices broke me from my thoughts as the others entered. It had taken ages it seemed to find them, and we had never found Noranti, but Stark was here, as were Rygel and Chiana. I missed seeing D'argo, the Luxon warrior that was named for, and Jool, both killed during the war between the Scarrens and the Peacekeepers.
As they gathered before me, my sisters remained with the small group. I noticed that 1812 chirped quietly at Ny'eri's feet. Both Claudia and Ny'eri had asked that I be the one to speak, saying that they couldn't do it. And now, I could see why, having the others gathered about them, they were both crying enough that it would have been nearly impossible to understand them through the tears.
I took a deep breath and began, "Thank you all for coming. My sisters and I am very glad to have you here with us. It just felt right that we gather here to remember my mother and father in this place where it all began."
I felt a wry smile slip onto my face. "My father used to say that he knew he loved my mother the first time that she beat the dren out of him here on, Moya. For that, if no other reason, it's good to be doing this here."
I saw small smiles on the others' faces as they remembered Aeryn and John as they had been.
"My sisters and I have been talking about our parents today, sharing with each other what we remember, and I think I've now decided what I remember most about them. What I remember most about my parents is how much they loved each other. Even when they fought," I smiled a little as I thought about it, “and boy could they fight, they always loved each other. They lived for each other, and they would have died for each other. They had a love that even time would have lied down and been still for. And the best thing about it for us, was that it included me, and Claudia, and Ny'eri, and all of you, their friends."
I looked over the small group, fighting back my own tears as I saw my sisters weeping. "That love is their mark on the Universe." Suddenly, I couldn't handle it. My parents just couldn't be dead, not when they had survived torture, and war, and death. Even if they had died proudly, saving some children from a collapsed building on Marontu, it wasn't fair. It couldn't be. Then, I thought about my parents, and how they had been.
With an effort, I gathered myself together to say calmly, "In the end, the most important thing to say about their deaths, is that they lived..."
FIN- at least, it is what it is
Title: In Passing
Genre: Farscape ficlit; John and Aeryn's kids grieve
Rating: G
Timeline: Several years after PKW
The soft hum of Moya's life surrounded me, following me out onto the Terrace as I stood silently looking out upon the stars. It was the sound that had lulled me to sleep as a child, and I took comfort in it now. Just as I took comfort in the sight of the stars about me, those that my father had once told me were my 'playground' when I was a child here on Moya. With care, I searched for the one star that I most needed to see at this moment.
"Ah, there," I whispered, spotting the brightest star, the one that my father had always named 'Aeryn.'
Wrapped in the soft hum of Moya, looking out upon the stars, I was very glad that my sisters and I had been able to contact Moya, Pilot, and the others. It was right that they should be gathering here, coming once more to the beginning. In this place, memories of my mother and father filled every chamber and their loving voices echoed down every corridor.
I felt a wistful sort of smile slip over my face as I spoke softly, "They used to dance here. I remember seeing them," I closed my eyes, letting the memory wash over me. "My mother would set her feet on top of my father's and she would rest her head on his shoulder. He would wrap his arms around her and hold her tight against him. And his face would be filled with all the wonder of his love for her. They would be so wrapped up in each other, dancing to a music that only they could hear."
"Moya and I remember," Pilot said quietly.
I opened my eyes slowly, taking in the stars once more before I made my way out the door and into the corridors of Moya. It wasn't difficult to find my sister Claudia; she was right where I had thought she would be.
I stood in the doorway of what had once been our parents' room on board Moya, watching my sister silently make her way through the room. Her hands brushed across a table and the wall, then over the bed as she felt her way through the echoes of our parents.
Seeing my sister listen to the voices of memory, brought to my mind my own remembrances.
"I remember, they used to sit on the bed and dad would brush mom's hair," I said softly.
My sister's blue eyes, filled with tears, met mine. She absently brushed her long, dark hair back from her face. "Mom would sit in front of dad, her eyes closed, leaning back a little bit," she said softly.
"Dad would brush her hair gently," I continued.
"And he would kiss her neck every so often," Claudia whispered as she remembered.
"Or smell her hair," I added.
"Because mom would scent it just for him," Claudia said, a small smile on her face as she remembered.
I nodded, sharing the memory of our parents here on Moya. "Where's Ny'eri?" I asked.
"She was hungry, so I told her that it was okay to go get something to eat," Claudia answered.
"How's she doing?"
"As well as can be expected," Claudia replied, her voice full of concern for our fifteen cycles old sister.
"Let's go find her."
Claudia nodded and walked out into the corridors with me. We reached the galley, but the only sign of our sister was the mess that she had left behind. Claudia sighed softly and began cleaning it up while I spoke to Pilot. "Pilot, can you locate Ny'eri for me?"
"She is here with me, D'argo," Pilot's calm voice answered.
I sighed softly myself and smiled a little, thinking that I should have guessed it; Ny'eri was fascinated with Pilot. "Thank you, Pilot, Claudia and I will come get her in a moment."
"Of course, D'argo," Pilot answered in his soothing voice.
I looked around the galley quietly for a moment. Even here, the voices and echoes of my mother and father lingered. "I remember one of the first times that mom cooked a special meal here for us," I said quietly. "I couldn't have been more than four or five cycles old, meaning that you were only two or three."
"Go on," Claudia prompted.
"Mom had gone to all this trouble to cook this meal for the Earth holiday, Christmas, but," I paused.
"But, what?" Claudia asked.
"Well, it was," I felt a wry smile work its way onto my face. "It was complete dren."
My sister giggled softly.
"I'm sorry, but that's the truth," I said, smiling. "And I wasn't eating any of it. But dad," I was half laughing now myself, "dad was eating every bite like it was the best meal ever. I remember that he had this big goofy grin on his face as he ate, and if you hadn't tasted the food, you would have thought it was the best meal ever. He just sat there eating, with this look of complete adoration on his face as he watched mom. Then, mom sat down and took a bite. That's when she realized that it really was dren, and dad was eating it for her."
"What happened then?" Claudia asked through her smile.
"Mom just looked over to dad, and she got this funny look in her eye. Before we knew it, mom had tossed some of the food right at dad. It hit him directly between the eyes with this wet kind of sound. And she was laughing."
"What did dad do?"
"What do you think? He threw some back at her with this big goofy grin on his face too. You were giggling like nothing else. Then it just turned into a big food fight." I was laughing as much as Claudia by this point in the story. "I remember that it ended in this big mess, all of us covered in goop, and dad kissing mom, saying 'Merry Christmas Aeryn,"
I felt my smile turn quietly sad.
My sister brushed her hands together lightly and looked around herself before she spoke, "Well, it's cleaned up here," Claudia said quietly. "Let's go get Ny'eri."
I nodded, and we both headed down to Pilot's Den. We spotted our youngest sister perched out of the way on Pilot's console. 1812, the DRD that dad had taught to play the classic overture, sat next to Ny'eri, chirping quietly.
"Hey guys," the dark haired, blue eyed girl said eagerly. "Come listen to this."
Ny'eri, of all of us, looked the most like our mother. I imagined that she looked a lot like our mother must have looked at her age. Pilot had seen it too, the resemblance to Aeryn Sun, and maybe that was part of why he had taken to her and let her pester him so much. Most of our time here on Moya, Ny'eri had spent in the Pilot's Den.
"Listen to what?" Claudia asked.
"This," she said to us, then turned to Pilot. "Pilot, will you play it for them too?"
"Yes, Ny'eri Sun Crichton," Pilot said in his serene voice and moved one of his hands to activate a panel on his console. As soon as he did, we heard the voices of our parents filling the Den like ghosts out of the past.
"Come on, Aeryn," our father was saying. "You know you want to."
I could imagine my father grinning at my mother, pouring on his boyish charm to get her to do whatever he was asking her to do.
"And how do you know this, John Crichton?" My mother was asking, and I could hear the smile in her voice.
"Because you love me,” my father answered confidently.
My mother laughed lightly in the recording. Then, with a soft sigh from her, we heard the most beautiful voice begin to sing. Ny'eri was sitting by Pilot looking very pleased with herself while Claudia and I exchanged surprised looks. The voice in the recording, our mother's voice, soared and swooped effortlessly through the notes of the love song.
When the song was done, we heard our father's voice once more as he sighed with seeming contentment, "Ahh, Aeryn, I love you." The recording ended and again Moya's soft sounds were predominant in the chamber.
"I didn't know that mother could sing like that," Claudia said, wonder in her voice.
"I didn't either," I said, knowing the same wonder filled my voice. "Pilot?"
The Leviathan Pilot's voice was gentle as he spoke, "Your mother often sang to your father when no one else but Moya or I could hear. Moya liked your mother's singing very much, it was she that requested that we remember it. If you like, I can arrange for you to have recordings of those times that we heard your mother sing."
"Yes, Pilot," Ny'eri answered eagerly.
"No, Pilot," I said at the same time, and Ny'eri scowled at me. I addressed her, "Ny'eri, understand. If mom had wanted to share this with people besides dad, she would have."
"But Moya and Pilot got to hear it," Ny'eri protested.
Claudia spoke to her sister gently then, "No, Ny'eri. I think that I understand what D'argo means. This was something that mom meant just for dad, only dad. They shared lots with us, with everyone, but this," Claudia paused, searching for the words.
"This was their own special thing, Ny'eri. Something just the two of them shared. I think that we should let it remain that way, even if it would be nice to hear their voices again.," I completed the thought.
"Okay," Ny'eri conceded, not entirely happy about it. But she would understand someday, I was certain. She addressed Pilot, "I guess we don't want them, Pilot."
"Very well," he said, Pilot scanned his console before he spoke once more, "The others are requesting permission to board."
"Of course, Pilot," I said.
"We'll meet them D'argo and bring them to the Terrace," Claudia said quietly, her voice subdued.
I nodded, thanked Pilot, and followed my sisters out of the chamber. They went to the docking bay, and I headed back to the Terrace. As I made my way through Moya's corridors, I could hear the voices of my parents as I remembered them in this place; arguments full of anger and passion, matched by moments of laughter and joy. I could remember them working together to fix something on my father's module, or eating in the galley, or sitting on the Terrace wrapped up in each other.
This last, I thought of as I entered the star filled chamber. I searched the stars again, once more finding my mother's. I had seen my father's star charts, full of names that I had no reference for; Earth names like Huey, Louie, and Dewie, Larry, Curly, and Moe. The one constant was the central star, always named Aeryn.
The sound of voices broke me from my thoughts as the others entered. It had taken ages it seemed to find them, and we had never found Noranti, but Stark was here, as were Rygel and Chiana. I missed seeing D'argo, the Luxon warrior that was named for, and Jool, both killed during the war between the Scarrens and the Peacekeepers.
As they gathered before me, my sisters remained with the small group. I noticed that 1812 chirped quietly at Ny'eri's feet. Both Claudia and Ny'eri had asked that I be the one to speak, saying that they couldn't do it. And now, I could see why, having the others gathered about them, they were both crying enough that it would have been nearly impossible to understand them through the tears.
I took a deep breath and began, "Thank you all for coming. My sisters and I am very glad to have you here with us. It just felt right that we gather here to remember my mother and father in this place where it all began."
I felt a wry smile slip onto my face. "My father used to say that he knew he loved my mother the first time that she beat the dren out of him here on, Moya. For that, if no other reason, it's good to be doing this here."
I saw small smiles on the others' faces as they remembered Aeryn and John as they had been.
"My sisters and I have been talking about our parents today, sharing with each other what we remember, and I think I've now decided what I remember most about them. What I remember most about my parents is how much they loved each other. Even when they fought," I smiled a little as I thought about it, “and boy could they fight, they always loved each other. They lived for each other, and they would have died for each other. They had a love that even time would have lied down and been still for. And the best thing about it for us, was that it included me, and Claudia, and Ny'eri, and all of you, their friends."
I looked over the small group, fighting back my own tears as I saw my sisters weeping. "That love is their mark on the Universe." Suddenly, I couldn't handle it. My parents just couldn't be dead, not when they had survived torture, and war, and death. Even if they had died proudly, saving some children from a collapsed building on Marontu, it wasn't fair. It couldn't be. Then, I thought about my parents, and how they had been.
With an effort, I gathered myself together to say calmly, "In the end, the most important thing to say about their deaths, is that they lived..."
FIN- at least, it is what it is