Stargate Atlantis Fanfiction - Gravity - Part Seven: "Alone in the Storm"
Gravity:Part One: Curls
Gravity:Part Two: A Gift
Gravity:Part Three: Yoga
Gravity:Part Four: The Garden
Gravity:Part Five: The Gathering
Gravity:Part Six: Together
Gravity
~Alone in the Storm~
The crisp light of autumn gathered in the tower office, chasing shadows and afternoon warmth through the simple Atlantean room. John set his report down on the desk, trying his best to ignore what was missing from the office.
“Colonel Sheppard.”
John turned at the greeting.
“Is there something you needed, Colonel?” Colonel Caldwell asked as he entered the office and settled behind the desk, placing his laptop down.
“My report,” John answered simply, giving a slight nod in the direction of the waiting mission report.
“Thank you, Colonel,” Colonel Caldwell replied as he set the report next to the laptop before opening the computer. “Is there anything else?” The Atlantean expedition leader asked when the military commander had not made a move to leave, nor said anything further.
“No, Sir,” John answered, visibly trying to not look to the bare wall where Elizabeth’s tapestry had once hung.
“I’ll see you and your team then at 0900 tomorrow for the mission briefing.”
“Yes, Sir.” John turned to leave the office, still trying his best to not notice what was really missing.
“Colonel Sheppard,” Caldwell said, stopping the younger officer in his path and prompting John to turn back to his commanding officer.
“I’m just holding the seat,” the older officer said straightforwardly.
John nodded, silently considering the unspoken reassurance and support from the almost unsuspected source.
“Sir,” he said then and left the office, heading in the direction of the commissary.
Without an immediate mission, duties, or briefing to focus on, John allowed himself to drift absently through the corridors until he finally reached the commissary. Once there, it was almost a relief to become lost in the ocean of sound and movement in the open room. Conversations washed over him without note, and it wasn’t until Teyla unobtrusively directed the colonel to a table with Ronon and herself, that John finally settled with his lunch.
He nodded absently at what John hoped were the right moments, but otherwise, the only sounds that seemed clear to him were his lone heartbeat and the chill sounds of autumn rain beating against the stained glass.
“Are you going to eat that?” John finally heard Ronon ask after what must have been several unanswered minutes.
“What? Oh, no; here,” the military commander answered absently as he slid the turkey sandwich over to the former Runner.
Ronon tore into the sandwich. “What?” He mumbled in response to Teyla’s meaningful look.
She sighed and shook her head slightly before watching with concern as her friend and team leader stood up from the table.
“It’s okay,” John said with a distracted wave of his hand. “Enjoy.”
“John,” Teyla began to say before the colonel interrupted her gently.
“It’s okay,” he said, finally looking his worried friend in the eye. “I’m okay,” he tried to reassure her.
Ronon looked over to his friend as well, his own silent concern a counterpoint to Teyla’s.
“I’ll see you at 0900 tomorrow,” Colonel Sheppard said by way of parting and walked away before either of his friends could say anything further. They were the closest thing to family that he had, but there was no way that John could find to explain to either of them that there were just some wounds that could, or should not be healed.
His hand went to the ring that he carried in his pocket. John grasped it tightly in his palm, allowing the sensation to become painful before he finally drew the warm piece of jade out. He rolled the elaborate ring in his fingertips, feeling the intricate unity knot design slide in a familiar dance against them.
“It’s not okay, Elizabeth,” John murmured in an aching voice as he finally stood before the door of the Zen-garden. He waved his hand over the blue control crystals and entered the sanctuary. Without hesitation, he walked out onto the open balcony, welcoming the chilling sting of the autumn rain on his skin.
“Damn,” he swore with aching intensity, continuing to twist the dark jade ring in his fingers.
“It’s not okay. Oh God, Elizabeth, it’s not even in the same galaxy as, okay.”
John looked down at the ring in his fingers, tracing the rich design of the carving. He had picked it up months ago on a mission through the Gate, but had hesitated to give it to Elizabeth. He had hesitated at the edge of everything that the ring meant; the final commitment that it represented. He had hesitated at the pull of gravity.
“Set me as a seal upon your heart,” he whispered with longing, feeling more than the freezing wash of rain burn along his skin. “As a seal upon your arm, for love is stronger than death, eternal as the stars,” he gasped, twisting the ring in his fingers.
“I didn’t know,” he called into the stinging rain. “Elizabeth!” He yelled, finally releasing all the pain and emotion that he had been running from since the IOA review and returning to Atlantis without Elizabeth at his side. “Elizabeth!” He screamed into the now raging storm. “Elizabeth!”
He clenched his fists at his sides, the ring an almost bruising shape in his left hand as the storm washed over him. It was so loud in his ears that he almost missed the insistent call of the radio in his ear.
“Colonel Sheppard,” Dr. Beckett said, his voice urgent. “Colonel, where are you?”
John stepped out of the storm and answered the doctor’s call. “Yes, Carson.”
“I think that you should come to my office.”
“What is it, Carson?”
“I believe it’s best if we discuss this in my office, lad; it’s about Elizabeth.” Dr. Beckett insisted.
John felt a tight knot of worry settle in the pit of his belly. “Carson,” he started to say.
“Just meet me in my office, lad,” Dr. Beckett interrupted gently. “We’ll discuss everything there.”
John was tempted to call Carson back over the radio and demand that he explain himself, but the military commander knew that the doctor would simply direct him once more to the office. The colonel returned the jade ring to his pocket and ran a shaking hand through his wet hair. With a final deep breath, he headed out the garden door and in the direction of the infirmary…
Gravity:Part Two: A Gift
Gravity:Part Three: Yoga
Gravity:Part Four: The Garden
Gravity:Part Five: The Gathering
Gravity:Part Six: Together
Gravity
~Alone in the Storm~
The crisp light of autumn gathered in the tower office, chasing shadows and afternoon warmth through the simple Atlantean room. John set his report down on the desk, trying his best to ignore what was missing from the office.
“Colonel Sheppard.”
John turned at the greeting.
“Is there something you needed, Colonel?” Colonel Caldwell asked as he entered the office and settled behind the desk, placing his laptop down.
“My report,” John answered simply, giving a slight nod in the direction of the waiting mission report.
“Thank you, Colonel,” Colonel Caldwell replied as he set the report next to the laptop before opening the computer. “Is there anything else?” The Atlantean expedition leader asked when the military commander had not made a move to leave, nor said anything further.
“No, Sir,” John answered, visibly trying to not look to the bare wall where Elizabeth’s tapestry had once hung.
“I’ll see you and your team then at 0900 tomorrow for the mission briefing.”
“Yes, Sir.” John turned to leave the office, still trying his best to not notice what was really missing.
“Colonel Sheppard,” Caldwell said, stopping the younger officer in his path and prompting John to turn back to his commanding officer.
“I’m just holding the seat,” the older officer said straightforwardly.
John nodded, silently considering the unspoken reassurance and support from the almost unsuspected source.
“Sir,” he said then and left the office, heading in the direction of the commissary.
Without an immediate mission, duties, or briefing to focus on, John allowed himself to drift absently through the corridors until he finally reached the commissary. Once there, it was almost a relief to become lost in the ocean of sound and movement in the open room. Conversations washed over him without note, and it wasn’t until Teyla unobtrusively directed the colonel to a table with Ronon and herself, that John finally settled with his lunch.
He nodded absently at what John hoped were the right moments, but otherwise, the only sounds that seemed clear to him were his lone heartbeat and the chill sounds of autumn rain beating against the stained glass.
“Are you going to eat that?” John finally heard Ronon ask after what must have been several unanswered minutes.
“What? Oh, no; here,” the military commander answered absently as he slid the turkey sandwich over to the former Runner.
Ronon tore into the sandwich. “What?” He mumbled in response to Teyla’s meaningful look.
She sighed and shook her head slightly before watching with concern as her friend and team leader stood up from the table.
“It’s okay,” John said with a distracted wave of his hand. “Enjoy.”
“John,” Teyla began to say before the colonel interrupted her gently.
“It’s okay,” he said, finally looking his worried friend in the eye. “I’m okay,” he tried to reassure her.
Ronon looked over to his friend as well, his own silent concern a counterpoint to Teyla’s.
“I’ll see you at 0900 tomorrow,” Colonel Sheppard said by way of parting and walked away before either of his friends could say anything further. They were the closest thing to family that he had, but there was no way that John could find to explain to either of them that there were just some wounds that could, or should not be healed.
His hand went to the ring that he carried in his pocket. John grasped it tightly in his palm, allowing the sensation to become painful before he finally drew the warm piece of jade out. He rolled the elaborate ring in his fingertips, feeling the intricate unity knot design slide in a familiar dance against them.
“It’s not okay, Elizabeth,” John murmured in an aching voice as he finally stood before the door of the Zen-garden. He waved his hand over the blue control crystals and entered the sanctuary. Without hesitation, he walked out onto the open balcony, welcoming the chilling sting of the autumn rain on his skin.
“Damn,” he swore with aching intensity, continuing to twist the dark jade ring in his fingers.
“It’s not okay. Oh God, Elizabeth, it’s not even in the same galaxy as, okay.”
John looked down at the ring in his fingers, tracing the rich design of the carving. He had picked it up months ago on a mission through the Gate, but had hesitated to give it to Elizabeth. He had hesitated at the edge of everything that the ring meant; the final commitment that it represented. He had hesitated at the pull of gravity.
“Set me as a seal upon your heart,” he whispered with longing, feeling more than the freezing wash of rain burn along his skin. “As a seal upon your arm, for love is stronger than death, eternal as the stars,” he gasped, twisting the ring in his fingers.
“I didn’t know,” he called into the stinging rain. “Elizabeth!” He yelled, finally releasing all the pain and emotion that he had been running from since the IOA review and returning to Atlantis without Elizabeth at his side. “Elizabeth!” He screamed into the now raging storm. “Elizabeth!”
He clenched his fists at his sides, the ring an almost bruising shape in his left hand as the storm washed over him. It was so loud in his ears that he almost missed the insistent call of the radio in his ear.
“Colonel Sheppard,” Dr. Beckett said, his voice urgent. “Colonel, where are you?”
John stepped out of the storm and answered the doctor’s call. “Yes, Carson.”
“I think that you should come to my office.”
“What is it, Carson?”
“I believe it’s best if we discuss this in my office, lad; it’s about Elizabeth.” Dr. Beckett insisted.
John felt a tight knot of worry settle in the pit of his belly. “Carson,” he started to say.
“Just meet me in my office, lad,” Dr. Beckett interrupted gently. “We’ll discuss everything there.”
John was tempted to call Carson back over the radio and demand that he explain himself, but the military commander knew that the doctor would simply direct him once more to the office. The colonel returned the jade ring to his pocket and ran a shaking hand through his wet hair. With a final deep breath, he headed out the garden door and in the direction of the infirmary…