FIC for: tarajeyul
Title: The Life of a Captain is Fraught with Peril
Recipient: tarajeyul
Fic or Art: Fic
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Oliver Wood, Charlie Weasley, mentions of Harry Potter
Warnings: None
Summary:Two accidents, a list, and a theory.
Notes: For tarajeyul. I’m sorry it’s not action/adventure or mystery/suspense, but there is Quidditch. My betas K, M, and S, I can't wait to give you the credit you deserve. Oh yes, and damn you and your maths, JKR. I hate fudging timelines.
~*~
Oliver never even had a chance to think that maybe he was doing well, that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. He’d just settled into position, just begun a preliminary scan, just begun to steel his nerves. Thankfully he’d already shifted his bits around to the most comfortable position he could find. And broomstick up the arsecrack, well, that was just something they all got used to.
His thoughts went as far as, “Ok, this is it, pecker up, Woo--
--My, what a comfy pillow.”
If that seems incongruous, well, it should. Unfortunately, it also happens to be one of the side effects of having one’s inner monologue interrupted by a sudden Bludger to the head, a drop of better than fifteen metres, and a week in hospital.
Oliver Wood began his dangerous life as a Quidditch player by spectacularly failing to finish his first game and suffering quite a lot of pain.
Not that it stopped him.
~*~
Charlie did not have the proper build for a Seeker. His Prewett stockiness should have worked against him, slowed him down, but as his record shows, it never really did. What his record didn’t show was that it made him a target.
Okay, well, his Quidditch record didn’t show it. His hospital record on the other hand…
But back on point, his not-your-average-Seeker-build made him a target. And as a player of an already highly targeted position, he racked up one of the longest lists of hospital stays in Hogwarts history. (Sorry, Hermione, not that Hogwarts, A History.)
In fact, when Oliver Wood explained to a terrified and tiny Harry Potter the extensive tradition of fouling a Seeker, it was largely from his vast experience watching and playing with Charlie Weasley that he was drawing.
Assaulted by Bludgers and subjected to the gauntlet of opposing teams, one must wonder why Charlie never switched to a position in which he could fight back.
Maybe he enjoyed it.
~*~
The Most Targeted and Most Injured Player Positions: A Ranking.
1) Keeper - Oliver Wood's speech to the contrary, it was his own position, not Charlie's, that was most routinely fouled. Think on it a second. Keepers are mostly stationary targets, compared to the other players. Sure, popular thought has the Seeker responsible for the win or loss of a game. Any Quidditch fan with a Weasley-level of appreciation could tell you that it's goal scoring that really makes the day. As protectors against that very point-scoring intrusion, Keepers are pelted with great frequency: Quaffles to the face, Bludgers to the knees and elbows, and far too frequent collisions with over-zealous Chasers and the occasional straying Seeker makes the position of Keeper highest on the list of deliberate and accidental injury. Wood's many bumps, bruises, scars, and fractures are a testament to that.
2) Seeker - Wood did not lie about the danger in this position. Keeper may be highest on the list, but Seeker runs a dangerously close second. While many of a Keeper's injuries are accidental in nature, Seekers are sought out by Beaters with their Bludgers, as well as dirty fighting Chasers and their Quaffles. The player able to win the most points in a single shot naturally is at high risk for fouling and injury. However, the factors that keep them from the top of the list are actually quite simple. Unlike Charlie Weasley, most Seekers are of the Harry Potter build, thus making them a much more difficult target to aim for and of course, to hit. They are also usually the fastest on the field. Being removed from game play and stuck in a cycle of observation and movement, they are primed to both see a threat coming and get out of its way. But they do get hit, they do collide, they plummet and slip and slam. Having every member of the opposing team trying to keep them out of the match secures their spot at number two.
3) Chaser - Chasers are constantly in the thick of match. For the same scoring reasons as Keepers, it is advantageous to knock them off course, foul away the Quaffle in their possession, impede their progress to the hoops. However, an individual Chaser doesn't pose nearly the threat of a Seeker, and is moving far more than any other player on the field. As such, it is not as pressing to target them, and they pose a more difficult target to hit. Of course, ask any Chaser and they'll tell you that they're at the top of the injured list.
4) Beater - One might expect, given the, er, violent nature of the position, that Beaters would be the most frequently fouled and injured. If one expected that, one would be forgetting that Beaters are the only Quidditch players armed with clubs. They are also the players trained and prepared to deal with high-speed objects whizzing towards their faces. And with the reflexes to smash away said high-speed objects, well, let's just say most Beater injuries were not the results of match play. The tempers that usually go hand-in-hand with Beater positions on the other hand...
~*~
Oliver Wood and Charlie Weasley. Two Quidditch players in dangerous positions, both of whom were frequently and often seriously hurt in the line of 'duty'. Two Quidditch players who kept it up, became Captains, led their teams to victory. One had the wrong build which, along with a bit of thrill-seeking behavior, resulted in him possessing an almost unrivaled hospital record. The other survived two minutes into his first game before being hospitalized.
Okay, true, they were never attacked by Dementors. No one ever jinxed their brooms to throw them off (though a Ravenclaw Chaser once tried to set the tail of Charlie's broom on fire) and, to the best of my knowledge, neither was ever set upon by Thestrals. And, fortunately for them, due to the linear nature of time, neither ever had to play against the infamous Fulcheon Finch who, in 1904, earned his infamy by knocking players to the ground and sitting on them until they were unable to get back into the air.
But they both took their knocks. Why keep doing it? Shall we look at their later careers? Oliver continued to play, professionally, meaning higher stakes and harder knocks. Charlie quit Quidditch, choosing instead to play with animals that, when they weren't trying to eat his face, were attempting to turn his arse into a well done roast. More danger, worse hurts for both of them. Were they both mad?
Nah. They just enjoyed it.
~*~
Recipient: tarajeyul
Fic or Art: Fic
Rating: PG-13
Characters: Oliver Wood, Charlie Weasley, mentions of Harry Potter
Warnings: None
Summary:Two accidents, a list, and a theory.
Notes: For tarajeyul. I’m sorry it’s not action/adventure or mystery/suspense, but there is Quidditch. My betas K, M, and S, I can't wait to give you the credit you deserve. Oh yes, and damn you and your maths, JKR. I hate fudging timelines.
~*~
Oliver never even had a chance to think that maybe he was doing well, that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. He’d just settled into position, just begun a preliminary scan, just begun to steel his nerves. Thankfully he’d already shifted his bits around to the most comfortable position he could find. And broomstick up the arsecrack, well, that was just something they all got used to.
His thoughts went as far as, “Ok, this is it, pecker up, Woo--
--My, what a comfy pillow.”
If that seems incongruous, well, it should. Unfortunately, it also happens to be one of the side effects of having one’s inner monologue interrupted by a sudden Bludger to the head, a drop of better than fifteen metres, and a week in hospital.
Oliver Wood began his dangerous life as a Quidditch player by spectacularly failing to finish his first game and suffering quite a lot of pain.
Not that it stopped him.
~*~
Charlie did not have the proper build for a Seeker. His Prewett stockiness should have worked against him, slowed him down, but as his record shows, it never really did. What his record didn’t show was that it made him a target.
Okay, well, his Quidditch record didn’t show it. His hospital record on the other hand…
But back on point, his not-your-average-Seeker-build made him a target. And as a player of an already highly targeted position, he racked up one of the longest lists of hospital stays in Hogwarts history. (Sorry, Hermione, not that Hogwarts, A History.)
In fact, when Oliver Wood explained to a terrified and tiny Harry Potter the extensive tradition of fouling a Seeker, it was largely from his vast experience watching and playing with Charlie Weasley that he was drawing.
Assaulted by Bludgers and subjected to the gauntlet of opposing teams, one must wonder why Charlie never switched to a position in which he could fight back.
Maybe he enjoyed it.
~*~
The Most Targeted and Most Injured Player Positions: A Ranking.
1) Keeper - Oliver Wood's speech to the contrary, it was his own position, not Charlie's, that was most routinely fouled. Think on it a second. Keepers are mostly stationary targets, compared to the other players. Sure, popular thought has the Seeker responsible for the win or loss of a game. Any Quidditch fan with a Weasley-level of appreciation could tell you that it's goal scoring that really makes the day. As protectors against that very point-scoring intrusion, Keepers are pelted with great frequency: Quaffles to the face, Bludgers to the knees and elbows, and far too frequent collisions with over-zealous Chasers and the occasional straying Seeker makes the position of Keeper highest on the list of deliberate and accidental injury. Wood's many bumps, bruises, scars, and fractures are a testament to that.
2) Seeker - Wood did not lie about the danger in this position. Keeper may be highest on the list, but Seeker runs a dangerously close second. While many of a Keeper's injuries are accidental in nature, Seekers are sought out by Beaters with their Bludgers, as well as dirty fighting Chasers and their Quaffles. The player able to win the most points in a single shot naturally is at high risk for fouling and injury. However, the factors that keep them from the top of the list are actually quite simple. Unlike Charlie Weasley, most Seekers are of the Harry Potter build, thus making them a much more difficult target to aim for and of course, to hit. They are also usually the fastest on the field. Being removed from game play and stuck in a cycle of observation and movement, they are primed to both see a threat coming and get out of its way. But they do get hit, they do collide, they plummet and slip and slam. Having every member of the opposing team trying to keep them out of the match secures their spot at number two.
3) Chaser - Chasers are constantly in the thick of match. For the same scoring reasons as Keepers, it is advantageous to knock them off course, foul away the Quaffle in their possession, impede their progress to the hoops. However, an individual Chaser doesn't pose nearly the threat of a Seeker, and is moving far more than any other player on the field. As such, it is not as pressing to target them, and they pose a more difficult target to hit. Of course, ask any Chaser and they'll tell you that they're at the top of the injured list.
4) Beater - One might expect, given the, er, violent nature of the position, that Beaters would be the most frequently fouled and injured. If one expected that, one would be forgetting that Beaters are the only Quidditch players armed with clubs. They are also the players trained and prepared to deal with high-speed objects whizzing towards their faces. And with the reflexes to smash away said high-speed objects, well, let's just say most Beater injuries were not the results of match play. The tempers that usually go hand-in-hand with Beater positions on the other hand...
~*~
Oliver Wood and Charlie Weasley. Two Quidditch players in dangerous positions, both of whom were frequently and often seriously hurt in the line of 'duty'. Two Quidditch players who kept it up, became Captains, led their teams to victory. One had the wrong build which, along with a bit of thrill-seeking behavior, resulted in him possessing an almost unrivaled hospital record. The other survived two minutes into his first game before being hospitalized.
Okay, true, they were never attacked by Dementors. No one ever jinxed their brooms to throw them off (though a Ravenclaw Chaser once tried to set the tail of Charlie's broom on fire) and, to the best of my knowledge, neither was ever set upon by Thestrals. And, fortunately for them, due to the linear nature of time, neither ever had to play against the infamous Fulcheon Finch who, in 1904, earned his infamy by knocking players to the ground and sitting on them until they were unable to get back into the air.
But they both took their knocks. Why keep doing it? Shall we look at their later careers? Oliver continued to play, professionally, meaning higher stakes and harder knocks. Charlie quit Quidditch, choosing instead to play with animals that, when they weren't trying to eat his face, were attempting to turn his arse into a well done roast. More danger, worse hurts for both of them. Were they both mad?
Nah. They just enjoyed it.
~*~