FIC for: enchantedescape
Title: Waivering Darkness
Recipient: enchantedescape
Fic or Art: Fic
Rating: PG-13 for talking and hinting at murder.
Characters: Lily Evans, Severus Snape, and Bellatrix Black
Word Count: 2200 +/-
Summary: The darkness lies within all of us. But is it as strong in some as it is in others?
Disclaimer: I do not own them. That right belongs solely to JKR, I just borrow them to keep the voices inside my head happy. No money is being made from this, trust me my bank account still says I'm a poor college student.
Author's Note: Whew. Its finally done. I hope you enjoy this. This is the second version of this fic (my computer ate the first one. I cried over it) and its not anything like the first one was, but here's to hoping you enjoy it anyway. Many thanks to my beta for being so patient with me on this. Any mistakes you may find are solely mine. Enjoy!
Darkness, it was always dark down here. She could never figure out why the dungeons were so dark and so cold. She pulled her cloak tighter around her as she made her way through the darkness. James had said to meet him down there, but Lily was beginning to think that it was all some joke. That at any minute either he or Sirius were going to jump out of the darkness and shadows and yell surprise at her and then make fun of her for believing them about the dungeons. She was about to turn around and head back up to the tower when the sounds of raised voices reached her ears.
“You want me to do what?”
“I didn’t stutter. Nor did he. You have your orders.”
Lily crept closer as the argument continued. She spotted an open door at the end of the hallway and figured that was where the argument was coming from. Moving closer to the wall she crept as close as she dared and gasped at the people in the room.
“And if I were to refuse. If I were to tell you the take your orders and shove them?”
“Oh Severus I don’t think you want to do that. Our Lord is not very forgiving of those who disobey him. It would be in your best interest to do as he says. I’ve heard that death is rather permanent.”
So it was true. Lily almost couldn’t believe that she was hearing this. She pinched herself and jumped when it hurt. So it wasn’t a dream. Bellatrix Black actually followed that mad man who called himself the Dark Lord. There had been rumors of a new dark power rising but Lily had dismissed them as just that rumors, but now it seemed that it was more than that. It was real, and it seemed like Severus had gotten himself mixed up in it somehow.
“Tell me Bella, how the hell am I suppose to do this? The stupid bint doesn’t go anywhere without an entourage. I would never be able to get her alone to find out.”
“You’re a smart boy Severus, figure it out. She’s only a Mud blood. It shouldn’t be that hard to out wit her. After all you are a Slytherin and she is but a stupid Gryffindor.”
Bella moved into Lily’s line of sight, as she had to hold in the gasp. The other girl had changed drastically since she had left Hogwarts two years ago. She was taller now and much paler, so much so that her black hair stood out greatly against the white of her skin. Well what skin was showing against her black outfit that is. Lily had to agree with the others, of all of their classmates, Black was the most frightening.
“Well Severus, what’s it going to be?”
“Does he really expect me to kill her?”
“The only good Mud Blood is a dead one Snape, you know that.”
He slumped against the wall as that thoughts tore through him. Granted he thought that about most of them, but this one was different. She had never been anything but kind to him; unlike her merry little band of misfits that she tagged around with.
“I don’t if the twit has gotten down on her knees and blown you Severus, you have a decision to make. Either she dies or you do. Whose life is more important?” Bella stopped in front him and watched him. She never did figure out what her Lord saw him. Other than his knowledge in potions the boy wasn’t good for anything. Like all Slytherins he had the love of the Dark Arts but it didn’t even come close to her, Rodolphus, or even Lucius. Yet her Lord wanted him, and wanted him now. Hence the orders she was to deliver. She couldn’t figure out why…he wouldn’t. Bella knelt down until she was on even ground with him.
“Do you love the Mud Blood Severus? Is that why you’re dragging your feet and considering disobeying our lord?”
Lily’s eyes widened as the word Mud blood was tossed out. There was only one person in the school they called that. It had been a favourite name for her from the Slytherins. They thought it great fun to tease and make fun of her by calling her that. It had hurt at first but after a while she had learned to just shrug it off and keep on going. Now though, now it seemed that the nickname was going to be the end of her, if Black and her new group of friends had anything to do with it.
“I don’t love her, not in the way you think Bella. But I do have feelings of some sort for her.”
Bella sat down hard as she started to laugh.
“Oh that’s rich Snape - the Slytherin Half blood in love with the Gryffindor Mud Blood. Won’t this make for an interesting tale to the others? It should provide a good laugh for quite some time.”
“How did you know that?”
Bella sobered up quickly and glanced up at him through her dark lashes.
“Know what Severus? That you were a half blood? Its common knowledge amongst our house. Everyone knows that you aren’t as pure as you claim. Did you really think you could fool those of us who grew up in the old families? Nice try Snape, it didn’t work.” Bella got to her feet and started to pace again.
“I grow tired of this conversation Snape. I need an answer, now. What’s it going to be? Your life or hers?”
Lily sank back against the wall as she tried to digest what she had learned. She was to die, that is if Severus could go through with it. Either way she had been sentenced to death, and all because of something as trivial as blood. A substance that other than running through their bodies and helping to keep them alive didn’t mean a thing. It didn’t mean a thing in the world she came from, in this one though, in this world blood was everything. And she was going to die because hers wasn’t like theirs.
“I really don’t see why you need an answer Bella. I am a Slytherin. We save ourselves before we save others. Let me ask you something Bella. Have you done it?”
“Done what?”
“Taken a human life? Completed the mission that you lay before me. Have you done it before?”
Bella paused in her pacing and turned to face him.
“Does it matter?”
“Humor me. We were friends once Bella, friends that didn’t hide things from each other.”
“That was a long time ago Severus.”
“Not as long as you think. Now stop avoiding the question.”
“Will it make your decision easier, knowing my answer?”
“Probably not, but it will help me personally.”
Bella sighed as she sat down in a chair across from him.
“I have.”
Lily’s eyes grew wider. She couldn’t believe it. Here they were discussing murder as if it were the weather, and her murder no less. Deciding she had heard enough she turned and ran down the hallway, she had to find James, now.
Severus almost choked. He hadn’t expected her to come right out and say it let alone admit to it. In fact he had almost convinced himself that he was going to die for asking the question - yet there he was still alive and for the first time not sure what to do with the knowledge he now possessed.
“Was it hard for you?”
“Is that what this is about? Your afraid you won’t be able to do it?”
“Yes and no. I am not you Bella. Yes I grew up with the Dark Arts but I don’t worship them like you and the others. The Killing Curse has always been hard for me.”
“There are other ways of doing it. After all they say you are the brightest student in a very long time in Potions. Poison them. They would never know what hit them.”
“I assume you’ve done this?”
“Like I said there are many ways to make sure a person dies and stays dead. It doesn’t always have to happen with a flash of green light.” She leaned back into her chair and studied him. She had known Severus for a very long time. In fact he had been one of her first friends, but as time grew so did they and they grew further apart instead of closer and once they reached Hogwarts they had parted completely except for the passing hello or something similar. Yet in all of those years she had never known the man sitting across from her to be unsure about anything.
“What is it that is really bothering you? Something like this has never bothered you before.”
“Something like what?”
“Murder. I’ve seen you kill hundreds of times and never bat an eye. What’s different this time?”
“There is a difference in taking a human life and taking the life of an animal Bella.”
“I know.” And did she ever. Bella remembered the first time she had taken a human life. She had holed herself up in her bedroom afterwards and cried for a week. It was something, no matter who you are or how dark you claim to be, your first human life affects you in a way no one else can ever know.
“I agree. I have never taken a human life Ella, I don’t want it to change me like it has you.” Bella’s head shot up as he answered what she had thought was a private thought. Things were serious now if he had dropped back into using the nickname that only he was allowed to.
“I won’t lie to you and tell you its easy, its not. The first time you take a human life is always the hardest. Even I discovered that. But I will tell you that it gets easier with time. That after a while it doesn’t bother you any more, well not as much as that first one does.”
“How many Bella?”
“How many what?”
“You talk about murder like its nothing. How many have you killed in his name?”
“More than I care to admit to. But I do what has to be done to protect us. As you must do as well.” Bella stood from her chair and moved across the room slowly.
“This conversation is over Severus. What answer do I give our Lord?”
“It will be done. Evans will die.”
Bella nodded and slipped out the door. She only hoped her friend was as strong as he projected. If he weren’t it would be the end of them all. If he fucked this up she knew, she didn’t know how she knew but she did that this would end badly, for all of them. That wasn’t something she was willing to let happen. With a thought forming she disappeared.
Severus sat in his tiny room for quite some time thinking about the deal he had just made. His life for that of one he cared for deeply. He had only lied partially when he told Bella that he put himself before all others. He put himself before all others save Lily. Next to Bella she had been the only person to give him the time of day; to be decent and civil to him and not look down on him for his looks. Next to Bella and Lucius Lily had been his only true friend. He had many acquaintances but friends were something he had very few. And now he was forced to end one of their lives, and all for some mad man who was no better than he. He had known for quite some time that their lord wasn’t as pure as the others. His blood was just as dirty as Severus and yet he wondered why he followed the other man. It was a question he couldn’t answer yet one he had best answer soon before his number of friends changed again. Dousing the lights he slipped into the shadows of the dungeons and headed for his common room. Maybe some time alone in front of the fire would provide him with the answers he was seeking.
~:+:~:+:~:+:~
bella knelt down in front of His chair and waited to be notice.
“What news do you bring me my faithful.”
“It is as you suspected my Lord. He waivers. His will is not as strong as the rest and I-“ she paused as she gave one last thought to her former friend. “I fear that he will betray us. He is not able to perform the task you give without doubt.”
“So he runs? To whom though will he run I wonder?”
Bella remained kneeling as she wondered the same thing. There weren’t many people he could run to and she feared he would run to the one that would get them all killed her friend before all of them.
“Leave me Bella. I must think on this for a while.”
“As you wish my Lord.” She rose and left quickly. It was going to be a very long few days. All of their fates would be decided and it rested solely on the shoulders of a seventeen-year-old boy. She hoped the darkness within him was enough to protect them all.
Recipient: enchantedescape
Fic or Art: Fic
Rating: PG-13 for talking and hinting at murder.
Characters: Lily Evans, Severus Snape, and Bellatrix Black
Word Count: 2200 +/-
Summary: The darkness lies within all of us. But is it as strong in some as it is in others?
Disclaimer: I do not own them. That right belongs solely to JKR, I just borrow them to keep the voices inside my head happy. No money is being made from this, trust me my bank account still says I'm a poor college student.
Author's Note: Whew. Its finally done. I hope you enjoy this. This is the second version of this fic (my computer ate the first one. I cried over it) and its not anything like the first one was, but here's to hoping you enjoy it anyway. Many thanks to my beta for being so patient with me on this. Any mistakes you may find are solely mine. Enjoy!
Darkness, it was always dark down here. She could never figure out why the dungeons were so dark and so cold. She pulled her cloak tighter around her as she made her way through the darkness. James had said to meet him down there, but Lily was beginning to think that it was all some joke. That at any minute either he or Sirius were going to jump out of the darkness and shadows and yell surprise at her and then make fun of her for believing them about the dungeons. She was about to turn around and head back up to the tower when the sounds of raised voices reached her ears.
“You want me to do what?”
“I didn’t stutter. Nor did he. You have your orders.”
Lily crept closer as the argument continued. She spotted an open door at the end of the hallway and figured that was where the argument was coming from. Moving closer to the wall she crept as close as she dared and gasped at the people in the room.
“And if I were to refuse. If I were to tell you the take your orders and shove them?”
“Oh Severus I don’t think you want to do that. Our Lord is not very forgiving of those who disobey him. It would be in your best interest to do as he says. I’ve heard that death is rather permanent.”
So it was true. Lily almost couldn’t believe that she was hearing this. She pinched herself and jumped when it hurt. So it wasn’t a dream. Bellatrix Black actually followed that mad man who called himself the Dark Lord. There had been rumors of a new dark power rising but Lily had dismissed them as just that rumors, but now it seemed that it was more than that. It was real, and it seemed like Severus had gotten himself mixed up in it somehow.
“Tell me Bella, how the hell am I suppose to do this? The stupid bint doesn’t go anywhere without an entourage. I would never be able to get her alone to find out.”
“You’re a smart boy Severus, figure it out. She’s only a Mud blood. It shouldn’t be that hard to out wit her. After all you are a Slytherin and she is but a stupid Gryffindor.”
Bella moved into Lily’s line of sight, as she had to hold in the gasp. The other girl had changed drastically since she had left Hogwarts two years ago. She was taller now and much paler, so much so that her black hair stood out greatly against the white of her skin. Well what skin was showing against her black outfit that is. Lily had to agree with the others, of all of their classmates, Black was the most frightening.
“Well Severus, what’s it going to be?”
“Does he really expect me to kill her?”
“The only good Mud Blood is a dead one Snape, you know that.”
He slumped against the wall as that thoughts tore through him. Granted he thought that about most of them, but this one was different. She had never been anything but kind to him; unlike her merry little band of misfits that she tagged around with.
“I don’t if the twit has gotten down on her knees and blown you Severus, you have a decision to make. Either she dies or you do. Whose life is more important?” Bella stopped in front him and watched him. She never did figure out what her Lord saw him. Other than his knowledge in potions the boy wasn’t good for anything. Like all Slytherins he had the love of the Dark Arts but it didn’t even come close to her, Rodolphus, or even Lucius. Yet her Lord wanted him, and wanted him now. Hence the orders she was to deliver. She couldn’t figure out why…he wouldn’t. Bella knelt down until she was on even ground with him.
“Do you love the Mud Blood Severus? Is that why you’re dragging your feet and considering disobeying our lord?”
Lily’s eyes widened as the word Mud blood was tossed out. There was only one person in the school they called that. It had been a favourite name for her from the Slytherins. They thought it great fun to tease and make fun of her by calling her that. It had hurt at first but after a while she had learned to just shrug it off and keep on going. Now though, now it seemed that the nickname was going to be the end of her, if Black and her new group of friends had anything to do with it.
“I don’t love her, not in the way you think Bella. But I do have feelings of some sort for her.”
Bella sat down hard as she started to laugh.
“Oh that’s rich Snape - the Slytherin Half blood in love with the Gryffindor Mud Blood. Won’t this make for an interesting tale to the others? It should provide a good laugh for quite some time.”
“How did you know that?”
Bella sobered up quickly and glanced up at him through her dark lashes.
“Know what Severus? That you were a half blood? Its common knowledge amongst our house. Everyone knows that you aren’t as pure as you claim. Did you really think you could fool those of us who grew up in the old families? Nice try Snape, it didn’t work.” Bella got to her feet and started to pace again.
“I grow tired of this conversation Snape. I need an answer, now. What’s it going to be? Your life or hers?”
Lily sank back against the wall as she tried to digest what she had learned. She was to die, that is if Severus could go through with it. Either way she had been sentenced to death, and all because of something as trivial as blood. A substance that other than running through their bodies and helping to keep them alive didn’t mean a thing. It didn’t mean a thing in the world she came from, in this one though, in this world blood was everything. And she was going to die because hers wasn’t like theirs.
“I really don’t see why you need an answer Bella. I am a Slytherin. We save ourselves before we save others. Let me ask you something Bella. Have you done it?”
“Done what?”
“Taken a human life? Completed the mission that you lay before me. Have you done it before?”
Bella paused in her pacing and turned to face him.
“Does it matter?”
“Humor me. We were friends once Bella, friends that didn’t hide things from each other.”
“That was a long time ago Severus.”
“Not as long as you think. Now stop avoiding the question.”
“Will it make your decision easier, knowing my answer?”
“Probably not, but it will help me personally.”
Bella sighed as she sat down in a chair across from him.
“I have.”
Lily’s eyes grew wider. She couldn’t believe it. Here they were discussing murder as if it were the weather, and her murder no less. Deciding she had heard enough she turned and ran down the hallway, she had to find James, now.
Severus almost choked. He hadn’t expected her to come right out and say it let alone admit to it. In fact he had almost convinced himself that he was going to die for asking the question - yet there he was still alive and for the first time not sure what to do with the knowledge he now possessed.
“Was it hard for you?”
“Is that what this is about? Your afraid you won’t be able to do it?”
“Yes and no. I am not you Bella. Yes I grew up with the Dark Arts but I don’t worship them like you and the others. The Killing Curse has always been hard for me.”
“There are other ways of doing it. After all they say you are the brightest student in a very long time in Potions. Poison them. They would never know what hit them.”
“I assume you’ve done this?”
“Like I said there are many ways to make sure a person dies and stays dead. It doesn’t always have to happen with a flash of green light.” She leaned back into her chair and studied him. She had known Severus for a very long time. In fact he had been one of her first friends, but as time grew so did they and they grew further apart instead of closer and once they reached Hogwarts they had parted completely except for the passing hello or something similar. Yet in all of those years she had never known the man sitting across from her to be unsure about anything.
“What is it that is really bothering you? Something like this has never bothered you before.”
“Something like what?”
“Murder. I’ve seen you kill hundreds of times and never bat an eye. What’s different this time?”
“There is a difference in taking a human life and taking the life of an animal Bella.”
“I know.” And did she ever. Bella remembered the first time she had taken a human life. She had holed herself up in her bedroom afterwards and cried for a week. It was something, no matter who you are or how dark you claim to be, your first human life affects you in a way no one else can ever know.
“I agree. I have never taken a human life Ella, I don’t want it to change me like it has you.” Bella’s head shot up as he answered what she had thought was a private thought. Things were serious now if he had dropped back into using the nickname that only he was allowed to.
“I won’t lie to you and tell you its easy, its not. The first time you take a human life is always the hardest. Even I discovered that. But I will tell you that it gets easier with time. That after a while it doesn’t bother you any more, well not as much as that first one does.”
“How many Bella?”
“How many what?”
“You talk about murder like its nothing. How many have you killed in his name?”
“More than I care to admit to. But I do what has to be done to protect us. As you must do as well.” Bella stood from her chair and moved across the room slowly.
“This conversation is over Severus. What answer do I give our Lord?”
“It will be done. Evans will die.”
Bella nodded and slipped out the door. She only hoped her friend was as strong as he projected. If he weren’t it would be the end of them all. If he fucked this up she knew, she didn’t know how she knew but she did that this would end badly, for all of them. That wasn’t something she was willing to let happen. With a thought forming she disappeared.
Severus sat in his tiny room for quite some time thinking about the deal he had just made. His life for that of one he cared for deeply. He had only lied partially when he told Bella that he put himself before all others. He put himself before all others save Lily. Next to Bella she had been the only person to give him the time of day; to be decent and civil to him and not look down on him for his looks. Next to Bella and Lucius Lily had been his only true friend. He had many acquaintances but friends were something he had very few. And now he was forced to end one of their lives, and all for some mad man who was no better than he. He had known for quite some time that their lord wasn’t as pure as the others. His blood was just as dirty as Severus and yet he wondered why he followed the other man. It was a question he couldn’t answer yet one he had best answer soon before his number of friends changed again. Dousing the lights he slipped into the shadows of the dungeons and headed for his common room. Maybe some time alone in front of the fire would provide him with the answers he was seeking.
~:+:~:+:~:+:~
bella knelt down in front of His chair and waited to be notice.
“What news do you bring me my faithful.”
“It is as you suspected my Lord. He waivers. His will is not as strong as the rest and I-“ she paused as she gave one last thought to her former friend. “I fear that he will betray us. He is not able to perform the task you give without doubt.”
“So he runs? To whom though will he run I wonder?”
Bella remained kneeling as she wondered the same thing. There weren’t many people he could run to and she feared he would run to the one that would get them all killed her friend before all of them.
“Leave me Bella. I must think on this for a while.”
“As you wish my Lord.” She rose and left quickly. It was going to be a very long few days. All of their fates would be decided and it rested solely on the shoulders of a seventeen-year-old boy. She hoped the darkness within him was enough to protect them all.