The Last Post: Dialogue Challenge. So Long & Thanks for all the Fish.
So Long & Thanks for all the Fish.
By: underlucius and eumenides1
Rating G
Characters: The Random Death Eaters
This place has gone to the dogs, it seems.
I like going to the dogs.
What?
Greyhounds. The woof woofs.
They do not call them the woof woofs.
They call horses the gee gees.
Aren't they a band?
No, you're thinking of the B52s.
Possibly…
What we doing here anyway?
We're just here to close up.
Why us?
No-one left. Just us. OMC.
Now they WERE a great band. *sings* Enola Gay…
Trust you. Original Male Characters, you numbskull.
Ah. Yes. I don't recognise this place though. Pretty.
No, they never let us in before.
Yeah. Pretentious gits.
It's special here, though. Unique, you know?
It's had its bits removed?
You're thick as a plank. I'm surprised somebody hasn't built a house out of you. Not EUNUCH. UNIQUE. Original. Not your humdrum, workaday sort of place.
Oh. Yeah, I guess so.
Look. Here's the library.
*sits down and reads* I don't understand most of it.
Well, that's hardly a surprise. Not enough pictures for you, are there?
I like pictures. There are numbers, though.
That's true. Bit of a craze, that. Numbered paragraphs.
I like 'em.
You do?
Yep. Handy. Helps me to know which paragraph comes next, see?
I didn't know you could count, actually. You really are an idiot, aren't you? No wonder you never made it to Minion.
Minion? I should be so lucky. I'll be lucky if I make Flunky by the time I retire.
You do know that Sir's retirement plan includes being swept under the rug?
Yep. Bought my own rug already. Nice little Persian number with its own fireplace. Room for two. *nudge nudge*
Please. I hope my future includes more than sharing the floorboards with you for eternity.
Hoping Malfoy will wave his Axminster at you, are you?
Shut up. Give me a hand with this dustsheet, this place is filthy.
Not really filthy. No more than an R. What's that there?
Some kind of sign. *wipes off retired Minion*
What's it say?
"Last one to leave please turn out the lights"
Oh. …
That's it then?
Yes. Looks like it.
Can't be helped. Say goodnight, RDE2
Goodnight RDE2
You… never mind. Come on. *sigh*
"…."
Well, that's that.
In the style of an Oscar winner (and I feel a bit like one, because I feel privileged to have been co-founder and moderator of this comm. which started as an idea and grew and grew like Topsy, and like Topsy, made a difference) I would like to thank: -
eumenides1 who was my co-founder, who believed in this project right from the very beginning, supported me, pimped, read and scouted, participated and defended me when there were "literati" arguments.
gehayi despite recurring illness and inconvenience, joined the team with whole-hearted enthusiasm. She has taken on the task of completely cataloguing the memories, so that we could all walk away with a smile on our faces. She worked tirelessly at this for weeks, cross-referencing and tagging and they are truly a magnificent achievement and a lasting legacy for anyone who finds this community after today.
To gredandfeorge, nassima, valteaall the others whose names I can't find at short notice - all the lovely lovely artists who let us use their beautiful art for the layouts. It was generous and kind of you.
To all the member-writers who were kind enough to join in my experiment and to turn it into something tangible which made the newsletters sit up and heads turn. There was rarely a time when a post on this comm. didn't make some or all of the newletters. Thank you for writing some of the most beautiful words I've ever read and made me want to set fire to my keyboard in my jealousy. For braving the detractors and being just damned PROUD to be a member, which in turn made people strive to be invited too. If I have any regrets about this comm., then it's that I didn't have more time and more capacity to search LJ inside out and find more members.
Last by not least by any stretch of the imagination, I'd like to thank YOU, the watcher. Even if you only lurked and didn't ever comment, it was lovely to know you were there, and so exciting to see the watcher list grow and grow and grow. It proved to me that there was a place for the community and that I wasn't wrong. Pretentious? Perhaps, at times. Snobby? For sure. . But if I was, I was in the best damned company on the net. I hope you had as much fun as I did.
Thank you all, so much.
underlucius
By: underlucius and eumenides1
Rating G
Characters: The Random Death Eaters
This place has gone to the dogs, it seems.
I like going to the dogs.
What?
Greyhounds. The woof woofs.
They do not call them the woof woofs.
They call horses the gee gees.
Aren't they a band?
No, you're thinking of the B52s.
Possibly…
What we doing here anyway?
We're just here to close up.
Why us?
No-one left. Just us. OMC.
Now they WERE a great band. *sings* Enola Gay…
Trust you. Original Male Characters, you numbskull.
Ah. Yes. I don't recognise this place though. Pretty.
No, they never let us in before.
Yeah. Pretentious gits.
It's special here, though. Unique, you know?
It's had its bits removed?
You're thick as a plank. I'm surprised somebody hasn't built a house out of you. Not EUNUCH. UNIQUE. Original. Not your humdrum, workaday sort of place.
Oh. Yeah, I guess so.
Look. Here's the library.
*sits down and reads* I don't understand most of it.
Well, that's hardly a surprise. Not enough pictures for you, are there?
I like pictures. There are numbers, though.
That's true. Bit of a craze, that. Numbered paragraphs.
I like 'em.
You do?
Yep. Handy. Helps me to know which paragraph comes next, see?
I didn't know you could count, actually. You really are an idiot, aren't you? No wonder you never made it to Minion.
Minion? I should be so lucky. I'll be lucky if I make Flunky by the time I retire.
You do know that Sir's retirement plan includes being swept under the rug?
Yep. Bought my own rug already. Nice little Persian number with its own fireplace. Room for two. *nudge nudge*
Please. I hope my future includes more than sharing the floorboards with you for eternity.
Hoping Malfoy will wave his Axminster at you, are you?
Shut up. Give me a hand with this dustsheet, this place is filthy.
Not really filthy. No more than an R. What's that there?
Some kind of sign. *wipes off retired Minion*
What's it say?
"Last one to leave please turn out the lights"
Oh. …
That's it then?
Yes. Looks like it.
Can't be helped. Say goodnight, RDE2
Goodnight RDE2
You… never mind. Come on. *sigh*
"…."
Well, that's that.
In the style of an Oscar winner (and I feel a bit like one, because I feel privileged to have been co-founder and moderator of this comm. which started as an idea and grew and grew like Topsy, and like Topsy, made a difference) I would like to thank: -
eumenides1 who was my co-founder, who believed in this project right from the very beginning, supported me, pimped, read and scouted, participated and defended me when there were "literati" arguments.
gehayi despite recurring illness and inconvenience, joined the team with whole-hearted enthusiasm. She has taken on the task of completely cataloguing the memories, so that we could all walk away with a smile on our faces. She worked tirelessly at this for weeks, cross-referencing and tagging and they are truly a magnificent achievement and a lasting legacy for anyone who finds this community after today.
To gredandfeorge, nassima, valteaall the others whose names I can't find at short notice - all the lovely lovely artists who let us use their beautiful art for the layouts. It was generous and kind of you.
To all the member-writers who were kind enough to join in my experiment and to turn it into something tangible which made the newsletters sit up and heads turn. There was rarely a time when a post on this comm. didn't make some or all of the newletters. Thank you for writing some of the most beautiful words I've ever read and made me want to set fire to my keyboard in my jealousy. For braving the detractors and being just damned PROUD to be a member, which in turn made people strive to be invited too. If I have any regrets about this comm., then it's that I didn't have more time and more capacity to search LJ inside out and find more members.
Last by not least by any stretch of the imagination, I'd like to thank YOU, the watcher. Even if you only lurked and didn't ever comment, it was lovely to know you were there, and so exciting to see the watcher list grow and grow and grow. It proved to me that there was a place for the community and that I wasn't wrong. Pretentious? Perhaps, at times. Snobby? For sure. . But if I was, I was in the best damned company on the net. I hope you had as much fun as I did.
Thank you all, so much.
underlucius