Dinner.

[howie_lovie]

It has been hours since my dinner with Jane Austen.  Hours which I have spent cleaning and washing dishes, since I do not believe a dirty home becomes me.  I have quite an amount of opinions as to the occurrences of the evening, and I will make some of these known, while others shall remain rather obscure, as I divulge what I wish, when I wish.

I

Comments

[playful_jane]

I honestly don't know where these horrid teachers get off, giving us so much homework when we obviously have lives to be living! It's extremely arrogant of them.

[howie_lovie]

Well, they are teachers, you know. They can't be faulted for doing their jobs.

We can always simply not do homework.

[playful_jane]

Yes, but then we might develop some sort of horrible guilt complex which will plague us as we get older and tear our mental health to shreds. I suggest some teachers (*coughRobertscough*) are too enthusiastic about their jobs and ought to hold back a bit.

[howie_lovie]

You think too much of us, Jane. That we would feel guilty for not doing homework is preposterous.

[playful_jane]

I stand corrected. I would feel horribly guilty and develop the complex, etc.

[howie_lovie]

I doubt it, and should you feel guilty, I would figure a way of ridding you of such guilt.

[playful_jane]

Such as? And use your own imagination this time, Phillips. Mine needs a rest; it's late.

[howie_lovie]

I refuse to think of such a matter when the need is not present. Feel guilty, and then we shall discuss and put into practice possibilities.

[playful_jane]

I am now feeling quite guilty and out-of-spirits. Please, present your possibilities.

[howie_lovie]

Lying does not become you, Jane. You are too tired to be feeling guilty.

[playful_jane]

No, I did truly feel guilty! I'm not sure about what, but as you can see, I'm feeling guilty! Would you like me to be guilty about something in particular? Very well. Not only did I not get as much done in your garden as I would have liked, but I also didn't help you with the dishes, which is quite unforgiveable.

[howie_lovie]

As host, it was my duty to wash the dishes, therefore your guilt is missplaced; and I told you you were not to work on the garden while we were conversing, thus, you should not feel guilty because of that.

Problem solved.

[playful_jane]

Yet everyone knows reason has no effect on the guilty; hence, I am unaffected, and you must conclude that I am truly guilty and use your wonderful imagination to relieve me of my sorrows.

[howie_lovie]

You cannot persuade me with your witty reparte and illogical mind, Jane. When I feel you are truly feeling guilty, I will endeavour as to what I spoke of earlier.

[playful_jane]

Perhaps I ought to feel guilty for trying to make you think I was guilty when I truly did feel guilty?

And illogical mind! Tsk! What nonsense!

[howie_lovie]

Indeed, what nonsense.