meh

[how_do_i_smile]

things have been pretty crappy lately.

- im still heartbroken as ever. n not allowing my self to let go. cuz i realy do feel that he is "the one" n i cant let go of that. even if he doesnt feel that way anymore.. i cant help myself. n i wont just.. throw it all away. even if it means keeping all this in tomyself for ever n never bein able to be with him again.. i wanna be with him. n if i cant have him, i dont want no one.

- my brother got in a bad car accident last night.

- ive been super sick all week. n todays been really bad n i feel like death. n last night i went to bed at 7.

- ive lost like.. 6 pounds this week, n i wasnt lookin to do that =/

- i been lookin like crap cuz of how acky ive been feelin.

- schools stressing me out to death.

+ im goin to the show this weekend.

= *both* Travis will of course be there.. n everytime i look at him.. i miss him more.. n when i think about him... i get butterflies in my tummie. n it makes me just want to be with him 2098420402834-0 times more.

+ me n arlena get to have our RAVE!!

- i hate being so upset confused n sick. god dang it!! ..

im out.