[ota] so stop your sighing
24 is supposed to be a Good Year. A completely, utterly Special Year. In some ways, it is. In some ways, it wrecks a bigger hole in his heart than 16 or 18 had.
But he's done what good Spades--and good Chives--do... sort of. He'd locked himself in his room, fully intent on washing half-real blood from his hands, and found Piper. Had managed, instead, to let the pain out with choked words and exhausted terror that didn't Manifest in the physical. Grief came in words; for the first time in his life, tears. Tears for Feilim, tears for Isaac, even tears for David. Tears little Joker hands had carefully smoothed away and left no sign of on his cheeks.
The next day, the sun was just a little brighter. The silver shone just a little more. The kitchen air tasted just a little more like the Clockwork that makes a man feel completely at ease. And to get some genuinely Good News on top of all that?
The Spades are going to have, for the first time since before Agnus held the position, an Actually Smiling Butler bringing them tea.
Marvel and despair as suits. He's going to enjoy feeling Happy while he can. And he's still going to fix your hair into neatness, you sloppy ridiculous folk.
But he's done what good Spades--and good Chives--do... sort of. He'd locked himself in his room, fully intent on washing half-real blood from his hands, and found Piper. Had managed, instead, to let the pain out with choked words and exhausted terror that didn't Manifest in the physical. Grief came in words; for the first time in his life, tears. Tears for Feilim, tears for Isaac, even tears for David. Tears little Joker hands had carefully smoothed away and left no sign of on his cheeks.
The next day, the sun was just a little brighter. The silver shone just a little more. The kitchen air tasted just a little more like the Clockwork that makes a man feel completely at ease. And to get some genuinely Good News on top of all that?
The Spades are going to have, for the first time since before Agnus held the position, an Actually Smiling Butler bringing them tea.
Marvel and despair as suits. He's going to enjoy feeling Happy while he can. And he's still going to fix your hair into neatness, you sloppy ridiculous folk.