Phones and expectations
How many people have you had get mad at you for not answering your phone, maybe have assumed you're willfully ignoring them. And then, finding out you didn't have your phone were still upset unless you had a "good [enough] reason" or genuinely forgot your phone? Why do we have a sense of entitlement to 24/7 access to people? Or for them to "at least" keep checking their phone frequently throughout every waking hour--weekend, vacation, evenings.
I've had people get angry with me for not checking my phone at potty breaks when I'm on a long drive--and they *know* I'm on a long drive--and they have no unusual reason (like active work day on a critical project) to expect input from me. Their call had some urgency--but expecting instant access all the time? Expecting me to have my phone set to ring *while I'm driving* so I can pull off at the next exit and return their call? When, again, I've no reasons to *expect* an urgent call?
Feel entitled to constant checking of my phone, in case something might be urgent, and then immediate return of non-urgent calls or texts because, well, I saw their message.
While some people may *choose* to constantly check their phone, it's not okay for anyone (barring on call, special circumstances) to expect others to constantly check their phone as a matter of entitlement. Effectively, it's become more common than not for people to expect everyone to be "on call" for them, all the time.
What used to be access we expected of surgeons or critical mission staff that "were on call" in a rotation--and even then, the number was reserved for genuine emergencies--has fallen into a massive sense of entitlement that seems to me to be a majority trait.
The people who *don't* expect that, I'm seeing more and more, are considered exceptionally laid back and easy going, rather than just normal and average.
Hey. That's not okay. Even if you choose to provide that kind of access to you for everyone who has your number, you're not *entitled* to it from anyone else. You're just not. You're also not entitled, if someone usually chooses to provide that level of access, to have them not turn off their phone or leave it behind, just because. "Sorry I didn't get back to you, I was away from the phone," should *always* be enough expectation if someone whose usually "there" chooses not to be, unless they've been "missing" for 24 hours. And only that because you might genuinely be afraid something's happened to them. This is, of course, unless you've made prior arrangements of the "call me when you get there" variety.
People who feel entitled to that access? Grow up. You're being brats. That "sense of entitlement" everybody complains about in others? You're doing it.
I've had people get angry with me for not checking my phone at potty breaks when I'm on a long drive--and they *know* I'm on a long drive--and they have no unusual reason (like active work day on a critical project) to expect input from me. Their call had some urgency--but expecting instant access all the time? Expecting me to have my phone set to ring *while I'm driving* so I can pull off at the next exit and return their call? When, again, I've no reasons to *expect* an urgent call?
Feel entitled to constant checking of my phone, in case something might be urgent, and then immediate return of non-urgent calls or texts because, well, I saw their message.
While some people may *choose* to constantly check their phone, it's not okay for anyone (barring on call, special circumstances) to expect others to constantly check their phone as a matter of entitlement. Effectively, it's become more common than not for people to expect everyone to be "on call" for them, all the time.
What used to be access we expected of surgeons or critical mission staff that "were on call" in a rotation--and even then, the number was reserved for genuine emergencies--has fallen into a massive sense of entitlement that seems to me to be a majority trait.
The people who *don't* expect that, I'm seeing more and more, are considered exceptionally laid back and easy going, rather than just normal and average.
Hey. That's not okay. Even if you choose to provide that kind of access to you for everyone who has your number, you're not *entitled* to it from anyone else. You're just not. You're also not entitled, if someone usually chooses to provide that level of access, to have them not turn off their phone or leave it behind, just because. "Sorry I didn't get back to you, I was away from the phone," should *always* be enough expectation if someone whose usually "there" chooses not to be, unless they've been "missing" for 24 hours. And only that because you might genuinely be afraid something's happened to them. This is, of course, unless you've made prior arrangements of the "call me when you get there" variety.
People who feel entitled to that access? Grow up. You're being brats. That "sense of entitlement" everybody complains about in others? You're doing it.