(no subject)
My head is spiltting and I just can't make it stop. I am feeling all kinds of pain and pitty for myself. I cannot make it end. I try and try to put these people behind me and no matter how hard I try they just keep comming back into my life. It's not that I don't want them there. Because ideally I want each and everylast one of these people next to my side forever and ever. I love these individuals more than life it's self. They all keep trying to involve themselves back in my life. Everytime I let them back in or think about letting them back in, all hell breaks loose in my mind. All I can remember is how they hurt me or how they will hurt me again. The green mosnter of jealousy come into play as well and I certainly do not like the person I become when I have these thoughts.
Lindsey Rupp - X bestfriend
Mikey Saban - X bestfriend
Dan Towers - X boyfriend
Mitch McGuire - X boyfriend
You all have been removed from my bl in hopes that I will stop checking your away messages. It's unhealthy to have these thoughts. I let you all in once and you all hurt me so much that I can never trust you ever every again. Not only did you betray my trust since the world we live in is so small, I get bits and pieces of the heartache you caused me from people that are not even you. Not one day goes by that I dont think about you or wish things were different but this is how the cards were dealt, obviously in your favor.
I wish you all the best, I just don't ever ever ever want to be a part of it again.
I gave you guys everything I had and you used it against me. Everylast bit of it. Strange how one second I can be fine and then the next something of a memory or someone says something and I'm back in the same boat I was when you all hurt me.
-edit- the thing is ill love you forever and ever.
Lindsey Rupp - X bestfriend
Mikey Saban - X bestfriend
Dan Towers - X boyfriend
Mitch McGuire - X boyfriend
You all have been removed from my bl in hopes that I will stop checking your away messages. It's unhealthy to have these thoughts. I let you all in once and you all hurt me so much that I can never trust you ever every again. Not only did you betray my trust since the world we live in is so small, I get bits and pieces of the heartache you caused me from people that are not even you. Not one day goes by that I dont think about you or wish things were different but this is how the cards were dealt, obviously in your favor.
I wish you all the best, I just don't ever ever ever want to be a part of it again.
I gave you guys everything I had and you used it against me. Everylast bit of it. Strange how one second I can be fine and then the next something of a memory or someone says something and I'm back in the same boat I was when you all hurt me.
-edit- the thing is ill love you forever and ever.