Confusion!
What a Weekend!
Friday Sean, my bf, came down to Tuscaloosa to see me. What i had thought was going to be a good weekend, ended up being not so good after all. He got to his sister's apartment, which is my best friends Jenny's apartment as well, Friday and i was there. I went back to my place cause i needed to work on an essay that was due. I had spoke to him and the plans were for he and i to go to dinner and me rent a movie. He was going to spend some time with his sister while i done my essay, good plans. I get a test message later while typing my essay that his sister brought him food, no big deal. And also that Jamie had given him so liquor or whateva. He said he was going to catch a ride over here. I thought that he was going to get someone to bring him over. Which was kewl.. But me misunderstanding, he meant for me to come get him. So i did. On the drive back to my place, he told me that he was going to go to the bar or something like that, a club here in tuscaloosa on the strip i think, with Jamie and Morgan. Said he wouldn't be gone long.. YEAH RIGHT!!! I knew they would be gone forever... So there goes my plans.. He's a big boi, he can do what he wants. So he stays at my place for about 30 min's maybe.. And then they pick him up and they leave.. Whateva.. I get ready for bed and lay and watch "Diary of a mad black woman" or whateva.. He text messages me and all that crap.. "Baby please don't be mad, stay awake till i get there, unlock the door, blah blah" ROTTED!!! I let him know how i felt...
Saturday... I cooked lunch for Sean, Jenny, and I. It was good. Kristen and Beth came over too. It was fun. I worked on my essay some more, Sean was suppose to be working on his as well.. Well he told me he wanted to spend time with me, etc. I asked him directly... If it was going to be me sitting home alone AGAIN watching a movie or what? Cause if he was going to do whateva... Then i was going to b'ham cause i'm not just waiting on his ass and sitting here alone... I don't deserve that, not from him nor anyone else... I know what i want and that's just the way it's going to be... Simple as that... Once again.. Chris was left in the dark.. He pulls the same bullshit.. Calls, Texts, and comes over later that night... Ugh.. Really under my skin at this point.. This boy just don't know HOW to have a relationship, at all! I told him that i didn't think he and i was going to work out, etc. Blah Blah..
Sunday.. Jenny calls asking me to go to eat lunch at a mexican restaurant, of course.. So Jenny, Megan, Sean, and I all go to eat lunch. Food was okay.. We go to target after wards.. It was fun. Get back to the apartment.. Later Sean says he needs to go to Bessemer to do something.. I offered to ride with him. So we went and done what needed to be done and then went to the Outlet there.. It wasn't that impressive. Came back to the apartment and he leaves to go to some chicks house. Fine with me whateva.. I had to try and finish my essay anywayz.. Not a problem with me.. Well, i get a phone call asking to come to bham to do a show cause someone canceled on her. Didn't need to cause needed to finish my essay for Monday morning. But i did.. It was an okay performance.. Nobody really there... But it was fun.. He text me saying he was one his way home later around 12am..
What a Weekend Huh? Rotted, i would say.. This weekend will be MUCH better i hope, and the upcoming weekends as well.. (o: It really don't bother me that much cause i really don't care about a relationship right now...
My heart says i'm in love with someone else, my heart tells me i'm suppose to be with someone else.. I prayed and prayed for God to open this guy's eyes. And i believe he did, or hope he did... Yet, things happened and went wrong. He had some problems with his health and had to move back home, Ms. He's now like 3 hr's away from me.. My hearts hurts and calls out to him, i know how i feel and i don't know what to do. I've told him, i've showed him... But? What else is there to do? If i knew the words to speak or the actions to do... I would do it... But, without knowing i can't )o: Long distance relationship? Yeah, i would do it... I would do anything for him.. Cause i know what i know.. I know how i feel and what my heart says and feels. "Listen to Your Heart" I have... Even before i had to tell him goodbye.. I listened to my heart... Yet, it has done be no good.. just hurt and pain. I Love You Michael... I Miss You )o: What else i can say or do? I would sacrifice anything... anything...
My LIFE of CONFUSION, HURT, PAIN, ETC.!
Christopher...
Friday Sean, my bf, came down to Tuscaloosa to see me. What i had thought was going to be a good weekend, ended up being not so good after all. He got to his sister's apartment, which is my best friends Jenny's apartment as well, Friday and i was there. I went back to my place cause i needed to work on an essay that was due. I had spoke to him and the plans were for he and i to go to dinner and me rent a movie. He was going to spend some time with his sister while i done my essay, good plans. I get a test message later while typing my essay that his sister brought him food, no big deal. And also that Jamie had given him so liquor or whateva. He said he was going to catch a ride over here. I thought that he was going to get someone to bring him over. Which was kewl.. But me misunderstanding, he meant for me to come get him. So i did. On the drive back to my place, he told me that he was going to go to the bar or something like that, a club here in tuscaloosa on the strip i think, with Jamie and Morgan. Said he wouldn't be gone long.. YEAH RIGHT!!! I knew they would be gone forever... So there goes my plans.. He's a big boi, he can do what he wants. So he stays at my place for about 30 min's maybe.. And then they pick him up and they leave.. Whateva.. I get ready for bed and lay and watch "Diary of a mad black woman" or whateva.. He text messages me and all that crap.. "Baby please don't be mad, stay awake till i get there, unlock the door, blah blah" ROTTED!!! I let him know how i felt...
Saturday... I cooked lunch for Sean, Jenny, and I. It was good. Kristen and Beth came over too. It was fun. I worked on my essay some more, Sean was suppose to be working on his as well.. Well he told me he wanted to spend time with me, etc. I asked him directly... If it was going to be me sitting home alone AGAIN watching a movie or what? Cause if he was going to do whateva... Then i was going to b'ham cause i'm not just waiting on his ass and sitting here alone... I don't deserve that, not from him nor anyone else... I know what i want and that's just the way it's going to be... Simple as that... Once again.. Chris was left in the dark.. He pulls the same bullshit.. Calls, Texts, and comes over later that night... Ugh.. Really under my skin at this point.. This boy just don't know HOW to have a relationship, at all! I told him that i didn't think he and i was going to work out, etc. Blah Blah..
Sunday.. Jenny calls asking me to go to eat lunch at a mexican restaurant, of course.. So Jenny, Megan, Sean, and I all go to eat lunch. Food was okay.. We go to target after wards.. It was fun. Get back to the apartment.. Later Sean says he needs to go to Bessemer to do something.. I offered to ride with him. So we went and done what needed to be done and then went to the Outlet there.. It wasn't that impressive. Came back to the apartment and he leaves to go to some chicks house. Fine with me whateva.. I had to try and finish my essay anywayz.. Not a problem with me.. Well, i get a phone call asking to come to bham to do a show cause someone canceled on her. Didn't need to cause needed to finish my essay for Monday morning. But i did.. It was an okay performance.. Nobody really there... But it was fun.. He text me saying he was one his way home later around 12am..
What a Weekend Huh? Rotted, i would say.. This weekend will be MUCH better i hope, and the upcoming weekends as well.. (o: It really don't bother me that much cause i really don't care about a relationship right now...
My heart says i'm in love with someone else, my heart tells me i'm suppose to be with someone else.. I prayed and prayed for God to open this guy's eyes. And i believe he did, or hope he did... Yet, things happened and went wrong. He had some problems with his health and had to move back home, Ms. He's now like 3 hr's away from me.. My hearts hurts and calls out to him, i know how i feel and i don't know what to do. I've told him, i've showed him... But? What else is there to do? If i knew the words to speak or the actions to do... I would do it... But, without knowing i can't )o: Long distance relationship? Yeah, i would do it... I would do anything for him.. Cause i know what i know.. I know how i feel and what my heart says and feels. "Listen to Your Heart" I have... Even before i had to tell him goodbye.. I listened to my heart... Yet, it has done be no good.. just hurt and pain. I Love You Michael... I Miss You )o: What else i can say or do? I would sacrifice anything... anything...
My LIFE of CONFUSION, HURT, PAIN, ETC.!
Christopher...