we were too precious to be true...
Jake broke up with me yesterday.
we're supposedly going to be friends though and stay in touch(i say supposedly because of what happened with Max)
basically he did it for two main reasons 1. he thinks its unfair to me to make me wait while he's gone for so long. he'll be in california for training for sept. and oct., then he goes home for thanksgiving, then for Christmas, then again for his time off before leaving for Iraq. plus depending on where they go in iraq he might not be able to contact anyone for the whole year he is gone. also he said that he might come home 'fucked up' or not come home at all and he doesn't want to put me through that. i told him that he can't "make me wait" that its my choice, but he still had other reasons-
2. he found out last thursday that another unit has gone to the part of iraq his unit was supposed to go to, so now his unit is probably going to Fascia, one of the worst parts of Iraq, the one they've been talking about in the news a lot. he says that if we stay together we'll get stronger feelings for each other and then he'll get depressed as it comes closer to the time he has to leave, that then he won't want to go, and he worries that while he's over there he'll mess up and get someone else or himself killed. he said that he needs to get into the mind set that he's going to war, that he might not come back and that he needs to focus on his training.
what sucks is that there's no way for me to really understand this reasoning. even if i can't see him or talk to him, its better to me to know that we are together. he said over and over that he knows this will be better for the future, for in the long run, and that he wants to be friends.
i hate that it has to be this way, but i know there is no way for me to change his mind. i think he's really starting to worry about iraq and i can't do anything to help him with that, and it sucks. it all sucks.
we're supposedly going to be friends though and stay in touch(i say supposedly because of what happened with Max)
basically he did it for two main reasons 1. he thinks its unfair to me to make me wait while he's gone for so long. he'll be in california for training for sept. and oct., then he goes home for thanksgiving, then for Christmas, then again for his time off before leaving for Iraq. plus depending on where they go in iraq he might not be able to contact anyone for the whole year he is gone. also he said that he might come home 'fucked up' or not come home at all and he doesn't want to put me through that. i told him that he can't "make me wait" that its my choice, but he still had other reasons-
2. he found out last thursday that another unit has gone to the part of iraq his unit was supposed to go to, so now his unit is probably going to Fascia, one of the worst parts of Iraq, the one they've been talking about in the news a lot. he says that if we stay together we'll get stronger feelings for each other and then he'll get depressed as it comes closer to the time he has to leave, that then he won't want to go, and he worries that while he's over there he'll mess up and get someone else or himself killed. he said that he needs to get into the mind set that he's going to war, that he might not come back and that he needs to focus on his training.
what sucks is that there's no way for me to really understand this reasoning. even if i can't see him or talk to him, its better to me to know that we are together. he said over and over that he knows this will be better for the future, for in the long run, and that he wants to be friends.
i hate that it has to be this way, but i know there is no way for me to change his mind. i think he's really starting to worry about iraq and i can't do anything to help him with that, and it sucks. it all sucks.