(no subject)
I haven't written here in so so so long...I almost couldn't even think of my username n password...but rite now I just feel like there is absolutely no one I can even talk to that would remotely give a shit n even tho lately I don't ever wanna talk about this shit that's hurting me, rite now I just feel like I wish I had someone I could talk to...
things r just so so so so fucking bad...I mean ok, they aren't bad in the sense of like I'm homeless or dying or some shit, I hear all the fucking time from ppl how I should b thankful for all the shit I have n it could b worse n shit n in a way I see that but I also feel like it couldn't b worse because what the fuck kinda life can u have when u have like absolutely no one in it besides ur family? I mean I don't even have a person that I kno I could call or text rite now n talk to them about this shit n they'll give a fuck about it instead of just being like 'shut ur mouth bitch, all I want is to fuck, not deal with the fact ur a human being n can feel'...I don't even have a person I can go watch a fucking movie with or go shopping or anything...n I haven't since like sometime thru Sept-October...n it's getting to this point now where I'm just really dying inside...it's fucking horrible, n every day it gets more n more fucked up it seems like...I feel like no one at all in the world even sees me rite now...mostly they're just horny deuchehole jerks that just see a pussy to fuck...I am so tired of this way that I get treated, I just want even like one person to act as tho I mite have a function other than just sex, like nobody even wants to b around me for any other fucking reason...
I don't kno, I feel slightly dumb now for writing here, I don't really kno that it's helped at all, I'm still crying n still feel the same...I felt like wanting to actually write this here mite have been a sign that I haven't completely closed off or become totally numb inside but I'm not sure how true that is cuz I feel so much like closing off now cuz I just feel stupid...but who knos...who will even end up actually seeing this anyways? I'm probably as invisible here as I am everywhere else...
things r just so so so so fucking bad...I mean ok, they aren't bad in the sense of like I'm homeless or dying or some shit, I hear all the fucking time from ppl how I should b thankful for all the shit I have n it could b worse n shit n in a way I see that but I also feel like it couldn't b worse because what the fuck kinda life can u have when u have like absolutely no one in it besides ur family? I mean I don't even have a person that I kno I could call or text rite now n talk to them about this shit n they'll give a fuck about it instead of just being like 'shut ur mouth bitch, all I want is to fuck, not deal with the fact ur a human being n can feel'...I don't even have a person I can go watch a fucking movie with or go shopping or anything...n I haven't since like sometime thru Sept-October...n it's getting to this point now where I'm just really dying inside...it's fucking horrible, n every day it gets more n more fucked up it seems like...I feel like no one at all in the world even sees me rite now...mostly they're just horny deuchehole jerks that just see a pussy to fuck...I am so tired of this way that I get treated, I just want even like one person to act as tho I mite have a function other than just sex, like nobody even wants to b around me for any other fucking reason...
I don't kno, I feel slightly dumb now for writing here, I don't really kno that it's helped at all, I'm still crying n still feel the same...I felt like wanting to actually write this here mite have been a sign that I haven't completely closed off or become totally numb inside but I'm not sure how true that is cuz I feel so much like closing off now cuz I just feel stupid...but who knos...who will even end up actually seeing this anyways? I'm probably as invisible here as I am everywhere else...